have you been to head cracking, life breaking relationships before?

@maryannemax (12173)
Sweden
April 22, 2007 10:11am CST
i had been to some relationships which almost broke my life. relationships where i felt my self-esteem were so low and felt my confidence level so down. i was able to get through everything after sometime. with thinking positively, looking positively onto life and with the people around who love and care for me, i can say, i am a better, stronger person after those head cracking relationships. now,i am happy with the person i love and the person who loves me. how about you? how do you deal in such situations? how do you get on?
5 people like this
20 responses
• Philippines
23 Apr 07
I don't get into such a relationship like that. If ever I have, I'll just pray.I know God is always there for me no matter what happen. He will listen to what my sayings and prayers to him. I don't want to give up.
• Philippines
23 Apr 07
Hello, anisa, welcome to mylot. I hope that you will enjoy it here. I like your attitude about not giving up on life for an undesirable experience. That is a good attitude. Keep it up and good luck. keep that faith as strong as it is now, that is, if you can no longer make it any stronger.
@bubuth (1816)
• Philippines
22 Nov 12
I also experienced to feel so down after I broke up in my first relationship. It is really hard to move on that time specially because that is my first relationship. I always hangout with my friends that time, I came home late, I always play music so loud, and I really don't know what to do that time just to forget my first relationship but after I coped in that kind situation I realize that I become stronger and I learn lot of lessons from my first relationship. Everything that happened has a good reason.
• United States
24 Apr 07
Oh yes, I had a relationship like this, he cheated on me every chance he could get and then would put me down when it finally ended I didn't think I had anything to live for, took me another year before I even wanted to go out and 2 years before I started dating again. I look back at it now and wondered how I got through, mostly I started involving myself in working out at the Gym and playing online. It has been almost 3.5 years now and I know I have moved on, I rarely think of those days.
@thai11 (239)
• United States
24 Apr 07
Prior to my current relationship, I was with a man for 4 years and we were engaged for the last year of the realtionship, to skip a long drawn out story- He cheated on me, told me on my dad's b-day which is X-Mas eve!!!So not only did this A-hole ruin my life(so it seemed at that time)he ruined the winter holidays!!!! I thought my life was over and like you, i turned to my friends for support. My parents weren't much support b/c they didn't like the guy in the first place- I was blessed to meet my current boyfriend that same New Year's Eve. I believe in God so I was blessed with having this guy break up with me and meeting my current love in the matter of a couple of weeks!! You have to stay positive and one has to keep the faith!! I have now learned that if a relationship doesn't work out its for the best, no matter whose fault it is so don't get caught up on "he did this or she did that" You'll go in circles and you'll slow down your healing process- F him if he didn't want you cuz there's a million more out there who will!!!
@god_spear (498)
• Philippines
24 Apr 07
It is really hard to accept the things that you dont like to happened, yues i experienced that also, when you someone very much, then there came a time that you have to be apart and go your separate ways, iut hard. On that situation i dont know wha to do, it seems that im going crazy maybe because its my first love. But as time goes by i learned to accept the truth and i learned a lesson well, that ion our life there are atimes that we should take it slowly meaning one should not take life seriously, one should take life lightly.
@meljessxena (2319)
• Australia
23 Apr 07
i have been in such relationship, and i thought my world come crashing down at my feet. i changed into a completely different person and didnt want to go anywhere. but i moved away and met new people and started bringing myself back to life, then i met a wonderful guy that loves me for me.
@Marie2473 (8523)
• Sweden
23 Apr 07
I had a relationship like this for 4 years as you know. He was jealous, abusive and also cheating on me. I was so blind, and he made sure that my selfesteem was lower than low. This was his way of keeping me from leaving him... Eventually I somehow found the strenght in my family and the few friends I had left and got out. The work afterwards was so hard. It took a long time for me to find myself again.. Today - I am like u - happy and in love with a wonderful man.. NOW I know what real love is...
• United States
23 Apr 07
i've never been in that kind of situation because i don't get into serious relationships im just fooling around most of the time
@Augustta (1860)
• Poland
23 Apr 07
rated "+" your post because i like. second,i never was in such a situation,oh,maybe when i was teenager and the person who i love don't love me...but nothing so serious like you say. i think in a way those experience is very good because how my boyfriend say"what don't kill you make you stronger"... augusta
@subha12 (18453)
• India
23 Apr 07
actually i myself never had been to such relationship. But i feel sorry for u. Then let me tell you that i have seen this type of devastating relationship with one of my friend. it was a nightmare for him when it broke. He was in such a bad shape at that time.We some friends helped him a lot to overcome this. i think its better to engage more into work and as time is the best healer u will be in a short time forget all.
• Philippines
23 Apr 07
Almost everyone of us had our share of this experience. The best way to deal with it, will be to give it a good shrug of the shoulders because, there are still so many good things in store for us. Besides, if the guy didn't fit well to our standards, it is best that we break it up with them before the relationship got to a more serious set up.
• India
23 Apr 07
i thank god for that but i havent been in such kind of relationship may be i cant take that so god has kept me away from that i wish all the best may god take care to those who find themselves in such condition
@Hobbz05 (84)
• Canada
23 Apr 07
Hmm i would have to say i'm still not fully over my last relationship it's hard to cope with sometimes expecially when u have a child involved. but at the end of that relationship i'd say my self esteem was pretty low and my life seemed to have changed to the point where i didn't know where to go next. One minute ur waking up everyday next to someone and having ur child around all the time the next u don't see ur child to often and its very hard to deal with sometimes. Having a child involded makes it twice as hard cause instead of getting over the person u were with, now u have to get over them and still have to keep in contact for the sake of the child n such.
@bmodina (241)
• Philippines
23 Apr 07
yeah before with my girlfriend coz we love each other in 6 months but the problem is during love making she will be the one do it for me, coz i don't know how to do it, i was ignorant that time or still innocent that's why she broke me up coz she thinks im not a guy, coz we guys be the one to do it, not girls, and now im realize im a mistake, coz its in the movies could do it, you know x rated movies, coz they pay the actors and actresses that a girl be the one to do it with guy, but in reality men should always do it with girls, and that's my mistake and my problem i was obssesed in a movies but now i realize i wont do it again for what i did, and now if i have a new girlfriend when we do love making il be the one to do it.
@maribel1218 (3085)
• Philippines
23 Apr 07
Such a relief to hear that you are strong to overcome that life breaking relationship my friend. You are such a brave woman!! I was never into a life breaking relationship before but I have one serious relationship that I can say made me look into one man as differently as before it made me a man hater that's why I joined the military reserve course to prove to all men that if they can do it we can too!! But in that very same training I meet the man who will prove to me that a brave woman needs a soft spoken man and a responsible young lad too! that no matter how angry I am to my former ex's it erases all my negative outlook and heal my broken heart unnoticed. I can say what we undergone before made us a great person and more stronger than before! miss you friend! Take care!
• United States
23 Apr 07
Yes, i have, and the bad thing is that that was my first relationship! I had a hard time accepting the fact that he is out of my life! it tortured me a lot. But as i grow older, i realized that you must not give all. You must leave something for yourself just in case you will be left alone. Love yourself also, that is the lesson i learned.
23 Apr 07
Yes indeed. My first girl friend was really cruel after being pretty much cool. I don't know why but she turned out to be a utter witch. I think we all would of done. Even with my wife I've been through which we've both found hard the loss of our daughter make me feel like my life was broken. Life all about picking ourselves up and getting on with it. things like my daughter will always be apart of me as my first girl friend now means nothing. Not worth wasting time really. ~Joey
@kgwat70 (13398)
• United States
22 Apr 07
My first relationship was the hardest one after breaking up with her as I loved her very much but she did not love me enough to want to marry me. It was very hard to deal with for a while but after some time had passed I was okay and we are still very good friends. She is married now and has a child and am happy for her and her husband and child, though I still wish I was her husband. The other ladies I dated that did not work out were not as devastating as they were not the right ones for me. i am glad that you are happy and found someone that you love and loves you back.
@easy888 (10405)
• Australia
22 Apr 07
Hello,maryannnemax,I am single now but I had been into a relationship which had broken my heart for a while,I have been recovered now of course. I was cheated by my ex-boyfriend one and a half year before, he told me he was single when i met him at the beginning,but actually I found out that he had hooked up with some other girls at the same time and not letting me knew that,he tried to find excuse for himself but I could not be tolerant about it. I was sad for a while at that time but then I understood that I should not be unhappy because he should be the one to be unhappy as he just broke up with a nice woman,since then,it seems that I enjoy my 'single'life pretty much.
@borzack (597)
• Malaysia
22 Apr 07
i think i have been there once. it was my first true love i guess. but when we broke up, i felt like it's the end of the world to me. that was the most horrible day of my life. and i've never open my heart to anyone until now.