Making people feel good about themselves.

Teddy bears - Good friends are trustworthy
@mssnow (9484)
United States
April 25, 2007 1:58am CST
I am the type of person who likes to build a person up and make them feel good about themselves. I find their good qualities and use those to build them up. I am doing it because it pleases me and no other reason. Some people automatically assume because I do this I want something from that person. Some just can't understand that there are people out there like me. I think they have been burned by people who used them or maybe some other reason. Some people don't trust anyone, which is just sad. Because there are people who CAN be trusted. My question to you is why do you think people get upset with me for trying to make people feel good about themselves?? Are you the type of person who doesn't trust people.? Do you try to make people feel good about themselves? Do you try to make someone smile? or do you just assume that people would assume you want something by doing this??
8 people like this
37 responses
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
25 Apr 07
You sure make me feel good about myself, especially when I am down and have the 'black' periods and it's a great feeling knowing that you are there for me and vice versa. To be honest I am very wary of strangers and I have a big brick wall which I put up when I meet someone new. I have been abused, used and manipulated as well as bullied in the past so you can understand why I am very reserved, shy and mistrusting at first. It has made me very cautious and I can never have a relationship.
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
25 Apr 07
I'm glad i can help you Wolfie. You and I have a special bond and that will be for as long as we stay in touch. Your like my sweet lil bro. You do help me too. Thanks for being you my good friend abd little bro :) Hugs to you. PS: I know it doesnt mean much to you but when you call me princess it puts a big smile on my face :).
1 person likes this
@angela2006 (1845)
• China
25 Apr 07
you are a kind person. when I am a child,I was very timid and had no confidence because many people say me"unly",of course,it is a fact that I have no good look.so when I seldom went out or played with other children.after going to school,my teachers taught me that look is not so important to a person ,it is the treasure what our parens gave us,we should value it.we can study very hard to boost our quality.so till now,I am a excellent girl in others'eyes.I appreciate my teachers so much.
2 people like this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
25 Apr 07
I bet you are a wonderful person. you seem to have a kind heart and thats what matters in life. how we are on the inside. :) Thanks for your comment
@maryannemax (12156)
• Sweden
25 Apr 07
i like the feeling of making one's day brighter. i love to make people smile. and by doing so, i can smile, too. i always try to find the positive traits of a person. especially those who have low self esteem. they need something to push them up and make them believe in themselves... and ofcourse, be able to love themselves more. maybe some are not just up for the praise that's why they hate to hear such positive words. if so, then don't continue. they don't deserve your time and effort. anne
1 person likes this
@maryannemax (12156)
• Sweden
25 Apr 07
yup. if you find them not that irritated yet, make them feel better by telling them positive words. you can go on and on. but if that person really isn't accepting, better stop then. take care
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
25 Apr 07
LOL yes I agree. Now I have tried just today to make someone feel good about themselves. but Im sure I will end up getting yelled at. lol All you can do is try right??
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
25 Apr 07
Thank you anne, very well spoken indeed. but maybe those people need to hear it more. who knows?
@aprilgrl (4460)
• United States
25 Apr 07
I try to make people happy and make them laugh. I have always like to make others smile and it makes me feel good when I make them happy and smile.
1 person likes this
@maryannemax (12156)
• Sweden
25 Apr 07
yup. there's a feeling of happiness in us, too when we make others happy. we feel so complete when we help others build their self confidence.
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
25 Apr 07
Yes i know i fel god when i make others smile. It brings my spirits up as well.
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
25 Apr 07
sorry about my typing. I meant to say I feel good. lol I so hate double letters lol
• Singapore
25 Apr 07
I will usually try to read them with my wizardy perceptions. I do believe that there are such nice people around. I would definitely you are one judging by what you said in this discussion. ;-)
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
25 Apr 07
And the lord of war wizards. honors me with his presence once again. LOL Thank you for your kind words. They mean alot to me :)
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
25 Apr 07
I'm not mocking you lol hey if you look at my profile page it says I am 7 lol.
• Singapore
25 Apr 07
Geez, I am just a 6 yrs old in diapers! Don't mock me, alright? :P
1 person likes this
@easy888 (10405)
• Australia
25 Apr 07
Hello,mssnow,I am very similar with you,i always want other people to be happy,as long as they are happy,i will be happy,too.I am not looking for rewards from them. I will also be happy if someone treat me good and want to make me smile, I will not assume them they will ask me for something later.
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
25 Apr 07
I can tell you are that type of person. People who are alike attract each other as friends i think. You and I have become friends :) keep up the good work!!
1 person likes this
• United States
26 Apr 07
I try to help build people's self esteem up. I hate seeing people downing themselves. It's one thing I truely cannot stand. I don't allow such things in my home. My children know that if they don't have anything nice to say, they better think of something. Words like, stupid, idiot, hate, or anything else that could be hurtful is not allowed to be said in my home.
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
26 Apr 07
Thats a good thing to teach your children well done :)
@Gwapako_28 (2140)
• Philippines
26 Apr 07
I went to my client office today. I go there to teach and give some instructions to her clerk. While i am talking to Leigh the clerk, she is trying to tell me about her salary and the task she is doing everyday. She told me that she is quiting her job soon. And i tell her not to think bad about many task and just have a low salary. Because that experiences will mold her into a better person and she will learn more and more from that task and someday it can be her weapon in finding a good job with a good salary!And i see her smile and comfort that i know deep inside,it somehow ease her.
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
26 Apr 07
well you at least tried to make her feel better :)
• United States
26 Apr 07
Well first i think you are right that people think you are doing it to get something in return from that person. A lot of people have been hurt because people only pretend to want to make you smile or be a little more happy but they only truly do it to "butter you up". I think if you can raise someones spirits for that day and many more that is great and keep doing the good work. I try to make as many people smile as possible after all a smile lifts the heart and makes peoples blood pressure go down. You have no idea what the power of just a smile can do. Believe me these people that you make feel better for that day remember that you did that and then they go out and do that to others as well.
1 person likes this
@kitkat1 (1227)
• Canada
26 Apr 07
Well you asked y people get upset with you for trying to make the person feel good i think it can be they feel so down on themselves and they think they are no where near what u make them out to be so you must be making fun of them to you get me. You see sometimes people with little or no self confidence or self esteem have a very hard time excepting compliments of any kind. It is not you and it is true that some people just dont trust they usually have there reasons even if it is not fair to people like you and i. I am very trusting with everyone i know til they give me a reason not to but that doesnt mean i stop trusting everyone because of one bad apple either but some do. I treat people the way i would want them to treat me and that is usually the best way to make them feel good about themselves without out being offensive too it has to work it is one of the ten commandments Do undo others as you would have them do unto you. It is just that simple. As for making people smile i am always smiling and that is contagious!!!!!!!!!!Have a great day i will.
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
26 Apr 07
Oh i know there are people like that too. i feel bad for them but you can only do so much.
@letzap519 (408)
• Philippines
26 Apr 07
i also feel good when i'm encouraging someone who feels down or disappointed about themselves... i'm not a judgemental person yes sometimes a person can commit mistakes but the good thing about it he can learn from it and he can avoid it for the next time... we should not stop encouraging people so that when we feel down these people are the one who will also encourage us....
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
26 Apr 07
mistakes are lessons learned. I agree dont stop encouraging people Thanks for your comments
• India
26 Apr 07
In the united kingdom, self-esteem has acquire the cultural status of a taken for granted problem that affilicts the individual and society alike.I think Low self esteem is invariable presented as an invisible disease that undermines people ability to control their lives. When we give some help to them they will be very much happy. the self esteem deficit is often presented as a condition that transcends the indiviudal and afflicts entire gerneations and communites. i think if you have self esteem you can make all the people happy
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
26 Apr 07
The best way to counter the invisible disease is to start as parents to build a child's self esteem. praise praise praise. Tell them how wonderful they are. Don't ever belittle them. It all starts as children.
• Canada
26 Apr 07
I very much enjoyed reading your comment! Other then myself I have not hear anyone use that term Invisible Disease for the low self esteem afflicting people today! Interesting that you would say it has taken on a cultural status in the UK. This is just so sad. What do you suppose we can do about this? Like no other time in history is self esteem recognized and more talked about. Yet it seems to be one of the biggest problems in society today!
1 person likes this
• India
26 Apr 07
Me too. I love making people happy, don't know why but i just love it, especially when i am around people whom i know. it makes me feel happy. Yea, and you are right there are people who think that i want something from them which makes me kind of sad but that doesn't me from being nice to anyone else.
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
26 Apr 07
it is sad but dont give up. keep on helping those people who want it
• Canada
25 Apr 07
I am that type of person too, I think everyone has good attributes and should have a reason to be happy with themselves. We are all supposed to be #1 to ourselves, even when we don't always feel like we are. I like to give people a reason to smile when they are sad, or even just feeling indifferent. It takes a special person to be able to see only the good in others, the world would be a much better place in my opinion if more people would just keep an open mind.
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
26 Apr 07
Oh yes i agree. and most people do have some good in them :)
@winterose (39887)
• Canada
25 Apr 07
You are very right, there are some people that think nice people are always out to get something, they don't trust them. Usually sales people are really nice but their ultimate reason is to get a sale etc. That could be why they are upset. But another reason is that you may be overdoing it. Too much of a good thing is not always appreciated. For example food is good, eat too much and you become either sick or fat, it is the same with compliments. I had a girlfriend once that people found annoying, she kept telling people how nice they were and there was not much other conversation from her. You can tell someone they have nice eyes, but if you tell them that every day it is annoying. Other than that, if you are not doing it too much like she did, then don't worry about what the others think, it is good to find good things about people.
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
25 Apr 07
LOL i find people who are overly nice annoying too. Like if they kept telling me i was pretty over and over again. I had a girlfriend like that too. i finally told her I didnt want to hear that anymore. I am not like that at all.
@TerryZ (22076)
• United States
25 Apr 07
I like to make people feel good too. You sound like a very sweet person. I know what your talking about when I do things for people they will ask what I want. Yes they have been burned by some rude people out there. I always want people to be comfortable and feel free to tell me their problems. Im a good listener. So tell me your problems.LOL
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
25 Apr 07
LOl thanks well when i have problems i will come to you lol I can tell you are a sweet person too.
@gemini1960 (1161)
• Philippines
25 Apr 07
Im a shy type kind of man and not fond of making others feels good for themselves , maybe i dont know how or not aware if im doing that, but ive got some bestfriends here in our place who can vouch for my camaraderie and all good traits, i do trust some people especially if i already familiar or have known a lot of them.
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
26 Apr 07
I always bring out the best in the shy types :)
• Canada
25 Apr 07
Smile - Smile!
I too try to make people feel good about themselves. Sometimes it works out and other times it doesn't. Sometimes people think I want something or I'm just sucking up for some reason. People that know me well though know that I am like that and that is one of my qualities they admire. I find it hard to trust people, but only because I have been burnt in the past. Once you have my trust though it's smooth sailing from there. I love to see people smile=)
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
25 Apr 07
I agree, it is very nice to see someone smile. I guess i trust most people . I trust until they show me otherwise.
@gizmo528 (731)
• United States
25 Apr 07
Good for you. We need more people in the world who like to make people feel good. I try and make people laugh or feel better even though it may not always work I know I tried. I don't like when people put down others. I used to work with a woman who made everyone feel bad about themselves so she could make herself feel better. I'll admit that sometimes I gotta wonder why people are trying to make me feel better, especially if I'm in a really bad mood, and what they want from me. Then afterwards, I realize that they just didn't like seeing me down and wanted me to smile. Keep doing what you're doing mssnow and make them people happy!
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
25 Apr 07
Thank you :) and good job on getting close to your first 100 posts on here. After 100 you get your star. I cant wait to see what you get. :)
• United States
25 Apr 07
This is true. Whenever one is being nice and friendly with others most of the time they think that we are wanting something in return. When truthfully all you want is to be honest and let others know how much you care. This happens a lot to me, especially with my friends, but I am learning to deal with, because even though life changes people's ways of thinking do not.
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9484)
• United States
25 Apr 07
You just have to take it with a grain of salt and know that some people appreciate you for being who you are.