If you were sick would you let others help?

@TriciaW (2441)
United States
April 26, 2007 11:08am CST
I just got off the phone with a friend who has been really sick. She has a line in to help her get enough nutrician in her body and she has been in and out of the hosptial. Now she has two boys and her husband is in the service. I hadn't heard from her in a couple of weeks so I called her husband yesterday to find out what was going on. She is doing very well yet she never called me. So when she called me today I gave her a lecture on how she would help me and I expect her to let me know what I could do to help her. Now she said she would of course as we all do but do we really call those people and say hey I need you to come clean my house or take my kids off my hands? I have to say I usually don't either so not sure why I feel the right to have gotten so upset with her for not doing it*L* However I was wondering if anyone of you would actually call for the help? Do you have someone in your life you know you could call if you needed help?
6 people like this
19 responses
@maryannemax (12170)
• Sweden
26 Apr 07
when i am sick, i try to get on by myself on my own. for as long as i feel like i can carry on, i won't ask for help for as long as i can. usually, i don't really need anyone to call out for help. but there was this one time when i had this mild heart attack since i was too stressed from work that day. i have ischemia, a kind of heart disease. and that day, my whole body just froze and i could not move. i had a hard time breathing, too. so, i dialled a friend's number who work in the hospital, too and managed to put her on a loudspeaker, told her to help me since it was the first time i got so scared in my life. that time, i live on my own, working in another city away from home. and i am glad my friend did arrive a few minutes after. she saw me in pain and helped me out, rushed me to the hospital. when i felt okey, we laughed about it. she told me how ugly i looked like when really not being able to move. and i pictured myself and laughed a lot. hehe. happy myLotting!
1 person likes this
@maryannemax (12170)
• Sweden
26 Apr 07
by the way, do you feel a bit upset because your friend just remembers to call you when she's sick and needs you to do something in her behalf? i hope i got it right. if so, you have reasons to feel bad about it. and i hope you get sometime to talk things through.
1 person likes this
@TriciaW (2441)
• United States
27 Apr 07
Actually she didn't call me I called and talked to her husband because I hadn't heard from her. She called me back because her husband told her she had to. I did however make an impact because he called me from ER yesterday when he had to take her back in. She told him make sure to call Tricia or she will be mad at me for not telling her again. I am waiting for a call back from him. If they admitted her I told her husband I was coming down to take care of their boys.
@maryannemax (12170)
• Sweden
27 Apr 07
oh. thanks for the clarification. i hope your friend is okey. you two are lucky you have each other. hope you hear from them soon.
• Philippines
27 Apr 07
Personally, I really dont like the idea of bothering other people. As much as I can, I avoid being such a burden. But I also have my limits. If there is really nothing I can do, like if I am sick, I will definitely ask for the help of my family and friends. Maybe your friend is just like me too, who handles things on her own as long as she can. But I am sure in case she caan't do it anymore by herself, she'll ask for your help too. And sometimes, when your sick, you tend to self-pity and dont want anybody's help. Just try to understand her situation. Do whatever you can to help her in any way possible. Extend my prayers to your friend and I hope she get well soon.
@TriciaW (2441)
• United States
27 Apr 07
Thank you for the prayers I know they will help her.
@Modestah (11192)
• United States
26 Apr 07
asking for help is a very difficult thing for me. I do not know if it is because of pride (lack of humility) or if it is because I do not want others to be put out. I think it is the latter. A lot of people will say, "call me if you need anything" but I am not sure they always mean it. and it is so awkward to make that call. I try to offer my friends a specific service when they are in need - rather than the ambiguous "call me if you need anything" so I am more likely to call them and say "Hey, I am going to town, what do you need me to pick up for you?" or "Listen, I just got done steaming my carpets, and I am in a roaring mood to keep going, can I come over and do yours too?" "I made some extra casserole tonight, I am going to pop on over and you can put it in the freezer for later if you already have meal plans" "I am taking the kids to the park for the afternoon, would yours like to come along"? etc.
1 person likes this
@TriciaW (2441)
• United States
27 Apr 07
I would do those same things too. My friend is in another town so popping over isn't an option. I think though you have it right as to the best way to do it.
• Canada
26 Apr 07
I feel uncomfortable asking others to come help if I am sick unless it is one of my children or husband that live in the household with me . I feel that it is my household and feel that I should be able to do it on my own and would feel that I was expecting to much of someone to drop everything to come help me . I guess it is weird when you think of it because I would gladly go help out a friend that was looking for some help but somehow feel inadequate when it comes to me needing help from someone else :)
1 person likes this
@maryannemax (12170)
• Sweden
26 Apr 07
just like you, i'd be glad to help a friend, too. but i hope that that friend of mine will not just give me a ring when she/he needs me. and won't remember me when she's okey and feeling alright. i hate such kind of people.
1 person likes this
• China
27 Apr 07
Maybe!But there isn't anyboby who I call for help!
1 person likes this
@unisis (1674)
• Indonesia
27 Apr 07
I would and would be so happy to have the help if someone can help us when I was sick,but I feel uncomfortable asking others to come help if I am sick unless it is one of my children or husband that live in the household with me . I feel that it is my household and feel that I should be able to do it on my own and would feel that I was expecting to much of someone to drop everything to come help me . I guess it is weird when you think of it because I would gladly go help out a friend that was looking for some help but somehow feel inadequate when it comes to me needing help from someone else, But people were so into themselves and nobody else, meaning, most there were not friendly or helpful. , So when I got sick and still can walk I went to the hospital cause it is near from my house.
• Pakistan
27 Apr 07
i would definitely call for help but i call someone very close to me.
1 person likes this
• United States
27 Apr 07
It is really hard for me to ask someone for help, I am not sure why? When I am sick I want to be left alone and just crawl in a bed and not be bothered. But I do not have children now that is different I would want them cared for and my pets I could call my mom or my brothers but only if I were desperate. I on the other hand get mad at my mom for not asking for my help when she needs it so this is a little strange. I think my problem comes from an uncle I had, I just thought of him as I was writing this he thought the whole world owed him something and wanted everyone to wait on him hand and foot and I swore when I grew up I would never be like him. That could be why I am this way?? And my mom is the same way.
1 person likes this
@wonderful1 (2076)
• China
27 Apr 07
i dont want to let other help me,when i was a student.but now ,i hope my boyfriend help me .if i were ill,he didnt help me i would think he didn't love me .i will not let my friend help me ,because they have their own life.
1 person likes this
@maddysmommy (16233)
• United States
27 Apr 07
No, I don't feel comfortable asking for help from anyone even family. It would also depend on how sick I was and if it meant finding someone to take care of my hubby and son while I was stuck in hospital for a while, then yes, I would probably ask family members to help out.
• United States
27 Apr 07
Of course! When I am really sick though not like just oh I feel icky sick. I am a big girl and I try to take care of myself. When I had the stomach flu last year in April I didnt run to my mom, I dyed on the couch. But when I get really sick like shakey, achy, fever, I totally dont ask but will welcome any help. Extra blankets for example. I was sick in January and I was so fever like my sister gave me extra blankets. I do welcome stuff like that for sure!
1 person likes this
@zjenikka (292)
• Philippines
27 Apr 07
I usually do not call for help. But if I notice the need to do so, I will call for help.
1 person likes this
• United States
27 Apr 07
I love it when people help me when i'm sick, its very nice. I think its very sweet for someone to help you when you are in need, its just something good to have a friend you can depend on.
@scapula (760)
• Jordan
27 Apr 07
Of course I would call help, but sometime when I'm sick I'll be confused and I can make mistakes, Although I like to call help, I found it difficult to call help especially If you want people see you sick, I don't like people see me sick so I say may be I'll be alright next day, and later I discover I really need help, So I just call my best friend and let him know about me, and he would help me without any lecturing.
1 person likes this
• China
27 Apr 07
Yes.It would help me feel better with others' care.Then i'll recover more quickly.
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• United States
26 Apr 07
I recently had to ask my friend to do me a favor when my husband was in the hospial. I hated to ask! I have done so much for this friend but I still felt horrible asking her to go to my house (she has a key) and grab our cell phone charger and bring it to the hospital. I don't know why I felt so bad asking. My other friend I didn't even ask her for anything but she insisted tha she would bring me some food to eat. I am glad that I have these two friends to help me out. They are blessings!
1 person likes this
@rodeotexas (1154)
• United States
26 Apr 07
If i was really sick then yes I would let others help me. Some people just don't like asking for help but if I really am sick and don't feel good then I ask.
1 person likes this
@wahmoftwo (1298)
• United States
27 Apr 07
Well it has always been hard for me to ask others for help. I don't know why. I don't mind helping others if I can. I do let my hubby and kids help though. They probably wish I wouldn't LOL! Don't take offense. If she really gets in a jam she'll have to ask for help.
@pclife (246)
• Malaysia
27 Apr 07
if i sick i'll will need others to help me...it emergency guys....