I’m a real person! I have real feelings.

@Swtrose (3399)
Canada
May 2, 2007 3:07pm CST
The internet can be a wonderful medium, but it can also entrap you into this self absorbed web where people can be anything they want to be. I mean would people say half the harsh things to someone face that they do on the net? Of course they wouldn't, but on the net people give little thought to people's feelings. Online it is hard to really find someone to be there for you because in the end it’s easier to log off then see that the person confining in you is really hurting. I hear so many accuses that this is just fantasy, that the cyber world is not real, but we are real people behind the computer and our feelings can get hurt. I once thought that it was just offline that people took advantage of you, but I quickly learned that they will online too.
16 people like this
36 responses
• United States
3 May 07
I must agree as well that more than half of the harsh things people say on the net would not be said face-to-face. There is a sense of security about sitting behind a screen and being mean in your own house, so that's why they do it. I try to be nice on and offline but it doesn't always work out that way. Although i have been a little nicer since i started taking medication!
4 people like this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
3 May 07
Taking happy pills are you?
2 people like this
• Philippines
3 May 07
this is true, as i have observed that there are some around here who are quite nasty. anyway, they are only few and we get few inputs from them consequently. it is good to know that you are making some efforts to be a little nicer. i have learned my lesson the hard way. it really hurts when somebody sends a bad message when, i am only doing some responses to one's discussions especially those which had zero respnoses. now, i keep no friends who respects none of my feelings.
1 person likes this
@naty1941 (2336)
• United States
2 May 07
Sad but true that people get on the internet and are rude, cruel and don't care who they hurt. Take care of yourself...and be careful as there are some very strange people on the internet.
3 people like this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
2 May 07
Naty so right you are.
1 person likes this
@howhigh (758)
• Canada
2 May 07
The people on the internet are the same as the people you walk by in the mall.. you just don't get to here what everyone is thinking in the mall
1 person likes this
@maryannemax (12173)
• Sweden
2 May 07
that's true naty. there are lots of cruel people online... people who think that they are always right and people who care only for themselves. sad to know that they do exist. all we need to do is be strong and try to be unaffected in any way possible. take care!
2 people like this
@soccermom (3200)
• United States
2 May 07
I know exactly what you are saying. I posted a discussion and got a response that didn't necessarily hurt my feelings but made me go "what did I do to this guy? he doesn't even truly know me!" A lot of cyberspace is based on false premise, but I'd like to think that 99% of us on MyLot are being real. I don't think in my case this yahoo would've said anything to my face, but if he really knew me he'd know where I was coming from.
3 people like this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
2 May 07
Sorry to hear about your situation. Just for the record, I was not talking just of mylot.
2 people like this
• India
3 May 07
Hi friends Dont say something just because of my lot earnings. Let us share the real information by discussions it can help all of us. dr.satish
@PsychoDude (2018)
• Netherlands
2 May 07
I personally think so a major factor plays a role in whether people came on to the net later in life or earlier on. I came on the net for the first time when I was about 9 and it was pretty much simply being set up still, everything was pretty crappy and you didn't really have communities like you have now. Over the past 11 years people have become more harsh on the net but to me it doesn't matter, I don't get touched at all by what someone says on the net. But if you come from a life without the net and you came on just a couple of years ago when it was already a big thing it must be quite a shock to suddenly find yourself being treated that directly, having people actually saying those things they would usually only think about you.
2 people like this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
2 May 07
I'm much much older than you and I have been on the internet for 10 years now. I work online so I deal with people hands on and it is still a shock the way some people treat you.
1 person likes this
• Netherlands
2 May 07
The age might be a big part of it as well, myself I have been grown up with it. It becomes a normal standard, which not only is seen online but also in real life amongst people of my age. You should be surprised by what can be said right into someone's face these days as well. Online people from all age groups get blended together though, whilst offline, how much do you go around with teens or people in their twenties? Hell I rarely talk to people over 30 in real life, but on the net I got quite a couple on my MSN list. Certain borders simply aren't present on the net, making it sort of an unnatural environment especially with more people starting to take an active role online.
3 people like this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
2 May 07
Being the mother of two teens, I quite often talk to teens.
2 people like this
• Philippines
3 May 07
I understand how you feel. When I was younger I was one of the people who acts mean to some.. but of course to those strangers who acts up... but then a few years after I realized all those being nasty was not good and its actually pointless and stupid so I mellowed down. This is the internet... there are few others who are sincere and some are not... and its also depends on how you relate to them. But of course to those who hurt you... dont mind them too much... just be nice to everybody... and avoid whatever arguments there is here..
2 people like this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
3 May 07
Again I was NOT talking of Mylot. Thank you for replying.
1 person likes this
@wachit14 (3600)
• United States
2 May 07
This is a one dimensional form of communication and it's really difficult to read people in this medium. I have a job whereby I rarely see my boss and she chooses to e-mail me instead of calling me to communicate. Many times I can't read the tone of her e-mail and I don't know if she joking around with me or just really annoyed. It's the same thing here and often I will look for the good intent before forming a judgment.
• India
3 May 07
hi friend I did not understand your comment can u please send me the full details about it!!
@4cuteboys (4102)
• United States
3 May 07
Yes, online and offline people can be so rude. I think its easier for people to be nasty on the internet because they don't have to say things face to face. It's too bad that people don't realize it and start acting more respectful towards others. I try to be nice on AND offline because that's how I want to be treated as well.
2 people like this
• United States
2 May 07
People are people on or off line. Some could be trusted with everything you own, others not as far as you could throw them. Caution should be used with all the people you meet. My husband and I used to laugh when we lived in RV parks--------the people you meet there can tell you anything and you wouldn't know if it was true or not. I have very good friends I met on line, and then had contact with in the physical world. We were friends before we ever met. My brother met his wife on line, and is very happy. On the other hand, I know of a woman who met a man on line, fell in love with him, married him and he stole all her property and left her flat.
2 people like this
@howhigh (758)
• Canada
2 May 07
Online you can be mean and avoid the consequences easily and maybe thats unfair. But so long as the comments are justified in the first place i think its fine. In society people bite their tongue a lot so to not offend people even when there are valid comments to be made. Since everything is anonymous on the internet we don't have bite our tongues.. so it while it seems harsh it can still be true. The internet is a faceless form of reality but it still exists.
1 person likes this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
2 May 07
Everything is NOT anonymous on the internet and that faceless friend is a real person and their feelings can easily be hurt.
1 person likes this
@howhigh (758)
• Canada
2 May 07
Yes feeling are still hurt but there are less tangible consequences when you are mean over the internet.. so i think a for a lot of people its easier to live with. Not the people who are being hurt but the other people.. so on the internet you may find that people can be meaner.. is that surprising?
1 person likes this
@stormygrl (763)
• United States
3 May 07
Yea it can be fun but heck even in pogo game rooms people start getting nasty with others.There's always someone who wants to stir things up.I rarely chat in these but just laugh at em and move on.Artists smessage boards get b*tchy and I don't think I've been anywhere on the net where you don't have this.Too many people just can't get along, just remember they don't even know you so don't let it bother you.
1 person likes this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
3 May 07
Thanks stormy.
@suman76 (648)
• India
3 May 07
Internet is the best source and medium to get the information of anything. It depends how the person is using it. otherwise it is good and beneficial for all the age group. Even if you teach your child you teach it from the internet. You can give the basic training from the internet . You can explore so many thing from their.
1 person likes this
• India
3 May 07
Hi suman I quite agree with your discussion. Please need to take it positively. In fact there is both positive and negative in all the aspects.
1 person likes this
• Canada
3 May 07
I find what you said to be very true. Who you are in the real world is who you will be on the world wide web as well. Except maybe more so! Behind the big screen one tends to feel invincable! I find it scary and appauling what people will do to each other on the net. But it is nice to know that the good far out ways the bad. Your a wise girl there Swtrose!
1 person likes this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
3 May 07
Why thank you.
@maryannemax (12173)
• Sweden
2 May 07
i believe that online people are "people", too. we all have feelings... behind those avatars, behind those discussions, behind those profiles, those responses, those comments... are real people who can feel happiness and get hurt as well. it's online where i met my boyfriend. it's online when i met old friends back then. it's online when i met new friends.. and it's online when i met new friends here in myLot. i even have friends here in myLot to whom i send letters and little packages through the regular post. and the friendship is really great. if we look deeper through the avatars and we feel the person, we know that there is a real human being there. however, it is in this online world when we meet the most annoying, most rude people ever. people who can judge you in an instance. i met a lot of them here in myLot. but they never put me down. i have friends who support me. and these rude people are just nuisance trying to pull me down... but they can't.. and i won't let them. i hope people will try to respect people offline or online... be true online or offline and be trustworthy offline or online... happy myLotting!
1 person likes this
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
2 May 07
Very well said!
@tinamwhite (3255)
• United States
2 May 07
Swtrose, While I admit what you said is true of some people in theworld.....but no all people are that way....when I write a response to somebody's discussion I put alot of "me" into....otherwise I usually do not respond at all. I do believe that it is easier for some to be rude...but these same people would not be much different inperson if you were around them for very long....true colors always show! I have read some responses that made me feel horible for the person who is asking for advice or simply stating their viewpoint on a specific subject; or the response is clearly one in search a penny.....no thought, or way off the subject! Good topic, my friend.
@Swtrose (3399)
• Canada
2 May 07
I know that not all people are that way. I have a couple of very close online friends. I was not talking of mylot in general. Thank you for responding.
@BGBabe (78)
• United States
3 May 07
I'm sorry, it sounds like you've experienced something quite unpleasant. Yes you do need to be careful who you speak to on the net. I would say that probably the MAJORITY of people on the net ARE NOT who or what they say they are. Quite frankly, in my opinion, ANYONE that has to pretend to be someone or something they're not is in need of immediate psychiatric care. It sounds like you've met some, not so nice people online, just steer away from them, block them. Anyone that has to hide behind a computer to hurt someones feelings and say something they would not say to your face, IS NOT worth getting to know anyhow.
1 person likes this
3 May 07
It is an unfortunate fact of life that people will say horrible things from the safety and anonimity of the keyboard and screen. I have had to learn that it is often better to try to ignore the nasty ones and enjoy communicating with the good ones
1 person likes this
• China
3 May 07
yeah,when u face the computer,time passes so quickly that u don't have consciousness of it,not only time ,but also your colorful feelings.
1 person likes this
• India
3 May 07
hi friend Its not only internet , take any thing there will be both good and bad about!! it all depends on how to take it positively
1 person likes this
@taheraa (1547)
• Giza, Egypt
3 May 07
Like any things, The internet can be a wonderfull mediun, But also if we used wrongly and hurt the other either in direct way or indirect, it transfere to a weapon which can kill the human people. The problem is, The wrong use of the things for example, the nuclear energy, can be used in pease or in the war depinding on the insides of whome are used either if its good or bad
1 person likes this
@batpig (99)
• China
3 May 07
in my case, i wont hurt people online,coz i know clearly that we dont really know each other.we are just sharing our experience here,no need to make others feel bad.the real world cannot make us happy so that we can find remedy here.but opposite case is some people get their real anger out online to hurt others.that is a shame,but we can do nothing to stop others,so just take care of ourselves,dont be so absorbed to what is the unfair judgement online towards us.we have the right to choose our own way online to communicate and the comfortable way to express us online, no hurt just communication.
1 person likes this