Giving Thanks.

Canada
May 2, 2007 3:34pm CST
"He took the knife from her and put it down out of her reach, then sat down and wrapped his arms around her as she sobbed, unable to offer any words to make things better, but desperate to convey as much love as he could to her ..." That was me a year ago. My depression was extremely bad and I was a danger to myself should I have been left alone. My partner was struggling to come to terms with how bad my depression was, and also he was worried too about how we'd manage financially with him staying home to make sure I didn't kill myself. He stayed home for 10 days, till he was certain I was okay to be left alone. That was my darkest period so far. I've only ever had those suicidal thoughts occasionally, and nowadays things are much better. There are times where I'm still down, and although I don't take anti depressants, I researched other ways and means of getting through the dark times. I finally settled on aromatherapy as a natural means, and also, more recently, pet therapy. However, the one thing that's helped me more than any other this year? Mylot. My new friends to be specific. Sharing the tough times with others who have been there before, and reading their kind words has helped immensely. Sharing jokes and laughter as a means of making me smile, offering tips and advice to others who need it as a way of making me feel good. Every single one of you have helped enormously in combating the dark periods that come from time to time with depression. I'll do housework, and think about a discussion I read the night before, and the corners of my mouth twitch and begin to curl upwards in a smile. Nobody I've ever known have had that power over me before. Thank you to every single one of you. Thanks to you, I look forward to every new day, instead of wanting to hide myself away in bed and let life pass me by. You could have no idea how grateful I am for having discovered Mylot, and the many wonderful people I've shared time here with. I have my life back finally.
4 people like this
6 responses
• Singapore
3 May 07
Hello my friend. I would have never thought you suffered from depression. You came across as a very strong and confident person to me. Well, it is a good thing that it is over and you are bouncy and cheerful now.
3 people like this
• Canada
3 May 07
I've suffered for the last three years, and although the worst of it is behind me, I fear that I'll never truly be over it. I have no certain ideas as to what set it off, although I think a huge part of it is related to the mistreatment of me at the hands of my ex partner. The attempted murder for sure I think, played a part. I still have my dark days you know. On those days I tend to stay away from the PC and focus on getting into a better frame of mind. My kids and the cat help me there lol. It's true what they say though. The people you least expect to suffer from something are usually the ones suffering the most.
2 people like this
• Singapore
3 May 07
Sorry to hear... well, glad that it's over! BELIEVE it's over! :P
3 people like this
@gabs8513 (48715)
• United Kingdom
2 May 07
Well I think there will be a lot of People here that this Site has helped including myself I am happy to have you on my Friends List as you are a lovely Person and never let anyone tell you different, I am glad that the Site has helped you and I am glad I know you It is like a big Family Sweetie and everyone helps the other Love and Hugs to you
3 people like this
• Canada
3 May 07
Awww gabs, you're too kind lol. And yeah, I'm blushing LOL. I'm sure that Mylot must have helped so many people in so many different ways. That's the beauty of a site like this, even the few a**holes don't get to me or dampen my enthusiasm lol. When I joined, I never expected a friends list like the one I have, and I cherish every single person on it.
3 people like this
@gabs8513 (48715)
• United Kingdom
3 May 07
Yes Sweetie and I am the same they are very precious to me and that is another reason why mylot has to stay as with most we will loose contact I have Mail addresses of some but not all and I would hate to loose them Love and a big Hug to you xxx
3 people like this
• United States
3 May 07
You will not believe the mistake I just made. When I was rating you the mouse slipt and I rated you a Negative. I am very sorry It was an accident. I ment to push positive. Like I said I am very sorry. I have never done that before. Darn I am feeling so bad. Sorry again.
3 people like this
• Canada
3 May 07
Lol, it's totally not a problem. Don't worry about it :o) We're all allowed our mistakes from time to time :P
2 people like this
• United States
3 May 07
I suffered from depression for most of my life. It has been just the last few years that I can honestly say I am out of the deep dark hole. I can remember wanting to die at the age of three. Now I am 48 and am free for the first time in my life. I can go to bed without wishing I would die, I wake up with the same feelings. I even can tackle our money woes without thinking I should kill myself. I do love mylot because I get to share things with others I also get to read about different peoples lives. I laugh on and off. Yesterday someone wrote in about a subject that made him gage while writing about it. I asked him "Then why are you writing it?" I laughed and laughed. I am glad you are out of your hole also. Isn't it great to finally see the sun? I still have cloudy days but they are quite infrequent. Good luck with your future.
@rx4life (1932)
• United States
3 May 07
Rugrat,The thanks go out to you..to you for reaching deep inside and finding the courage and desire to bless this world with a beautiful human being, a wonderful mom, daughter, partner and friend, a creative, funny, intelligent and loyal person that has definitely been a positive influence on this world. We all have dark times, some darker than others and some harder to find the light than others..but nonetheless no matter the degree of our bad times there is always the light...and if we always look to the light we will find our way through the darkness. Just remember you are NEVER alone...for many reasons...you have a loving family and your myLot family is extensive and concerned. Although we may be with you in a different way, we are there. Never hesitate to PM me if you just need to talk...about anything...I am so happy that you chose the light ( the energy that you are)..and I hope everyday reminds you how important you are and how loved... so thanks to you for giving us the honor and enjoyment of having you here to provoke thought, answer our good and bad discussions, laugh with us and at us and share that wonderful energy that is you!!!
• Canada
3 May 07
Your kind words have me in tears. Thank you so so much for saying all those kind things about me LOL. I'm a sap, so when people are nice to me, I cry LOL. There have been dark times in my life, along with many others, I'm sure. Finding the courage to keep going at times has been a struggle. I'm thankful every day for my life that I have, my loving partner, my wonderful crazy kids lol, and of course, my neurotic Cat! I couldn't imagine sharing my life with anyone else in the way I have with my friends at Mylot, You guys are truly one of a kind, a group like no other. I'm honored to be a part of that.
2 people like this
@rx4life (1932)
• United States
3 May 07
You deserve every kind word...you have come through a rough time and that is no easy task..( sort of been there in a little different way)..although we never have met, I have felt your wonderful energy (your light)since the first time I read one of your posts...and I hope to be reading, laughing and sharing for a very long time. Cheers....
2 people like this
@MsTickle (24994)
• Australia
9 May 07
My dear friend, I'm so pleased you are able to see the light. Depression is a terrible place to be and not being able to control your thoughts when they turn to the dark side is so difficult to understand. I'm glad you have chosen to self heal. As for Mylot, it's alsdo added a new dimension to my life. Reading the stories of the trials and tribulations, joys, just sharing with others has opened my eyes to more of the world and the people in it and given me a better understanding of self. I'm not so different after all and I feel like I belong here, it's a wonderful thing to "fit in".