Can your children talk to you about everything?

@KissThis (3008)
United States
May 6, 2007 11:18am CST
My niece came to me about a problem that she was having at school. While I am willing to help her out I asked her if she had talked to her parents about what was going on. She told me that she didn't feel comfortable about discussing such matters with her parents. So I was wondering does your children feel comfortable about coming to you about their problems? Would you want them to go to someone else for advice?
9 people like this
18 responses
@betchai (141)
• Philippines
8 May 07
My daughter can talk to me everything she wants, except my relationship with her dad. I can't say to her that I don't love her dad anymore.
2 people like this
@KissThis (3008)
• United States
9 May 07
wow That must be hard. I don't know how I could handle that.
1 person likes this
@Augustta (1860)
• Poland
7 May 07
I start a post where i said my daughter think about me i am "cool"...she love me very much and we are real friends,and not just that she told me everything but also i have in her a great friend and i have no secrets ...well,with a little limit... So,to answer at your post ,yes my daughter tell me everything!
2 people like this
@KissThis (3008)
• United States
7 May 07
LOL. I responded to that post ! I think that it is wonderful that your daughter thinks your cool.
1 person likes this
@lafavorito (2970)
• Philippines
7 May 07
Though I don't know the problem of your niece, I understand how she feels about not being comfortable talking to her parents about her problems. I was once like that, whenever I tell my parents about a certain problem I have instead of helping me they always scold me for screwing up. The best you can do is help your niece by giving her the advice she needs. Telling her parents about this situation might make her lose feel worse, if they scold her for getting help from other people. Still it will depend on how well you know her parents. If her parents are like my parents, it's best that you don't tell them about this. Just my POV.
2 people like this
@KissThis (3008)
• United States
7 May 07
No matter what I will always be here for any of my nieces and nephews. I just try to encourage trust beteen the child and their parents is all. I know how I would feel if my children went to someone else for advice. I try to be as open as I can be with everyone.
1 person likes this
@roque20 (518)
• Philippines
7 May 07
I am still single yet but i do have a cousin who talk to me about everything because she is so talkative and i like it so that when she grow up she is confident enough and she can be open and well monitor when she grow up.
@KissThis (3008)
• United States
7 May 07
Thats wonderful that your cousin can talk to you. It must mean that you are a very caring person.
1 person likes this
@wonderful1 (2076)
• China
7 May 07
I often talk with my mom about everything happened to me, but only one thing i don't tell her. My mom is very traditional, so she thinks that I should live in a house with my bf after we are married, but I don't think so. I feel if I dont' live in a house with my bf, I can't know him very well. So now my mom don't know we have lived together. But in our country, it is not legal. Only couples can live together, but it is not suitable for all of cities. In my city, it is not serious for a pair of lovers who lived together without marriage. Most of college students live with their bfs/gfs. Is it allowed in your country?
2 people like this
@KissThis (3008)
• United States
7 May 07
In my country it is common for couples to live together before they are married. I think that to really know someone you should live with them first.
1 person likes this
@livelily (141)
• China
6 May 07
Haha...I don't think that there are any parents do not want their children to talk to them about everything though I am not married. Similarly, I did not want to tell my parents about everything, beacuse they would worry about something and a lot of notions can't be understanding by them, so I would like to choose most of something tell them know and the other don't.
@KissThis (3008)
• United States
7 May 07
Right now my children tell me everything. I hope as they get older they will continue to because I always want to be there when they need. A parent is surpose to worry about their child but a parent has to push that worry to the side so that they are able to help as well.
1 person likes this
@Woodpigeon (3710)
• Ireland
8 May 07
Yes, I like to think they can alk to me about anything. Sometimes it takes a bit of teasing it out of them to get to the root of the matter, but we get there. I think they have learned it is better to get it off their chests and then sometimes the problems seem smaller.
2 people like this
@JackBravo (970)
• United States
7 May 07
well, I don't have children yet but I would hope that they can come to me with everythign. even if it's an uncomfortable subject, i'd like to know what was going on in their lives in case they're in danger and don't knwo it.
2 people like this
• United States
7 May 07
I think children should talk to whoever they feel the most comfortable talking to. Of course, I would want my kids to talk to me first, but as long as they talked to a trusted adult, I would be ok with that. When I was growing up, I wasn't always comfortable talking with my parents, but I knew I could talk to my best-friend's mom and get good advice from a woman who's really been there! Now that I have my own kids, I often seek advice from my parents on things I wouldn't have while growing up. I think it's about (for me anyway) feeling as an equal to them. Knowing that because they see me as an adult, they will listen as one. So as long as you treat your kids as though you trust them, I think they will trust you enough to come to you about anything.
2 people like this
@dixits (104)
• India
7 May 07
i dont thnik so they hestitate to talk about it and sometimes even we hesitate of talk also we think wat they weill feel if we ask or tell them abt our problem i dont thnik in future our children will be able to talk to us
2 people like this
@34momma (13896)
• United States
7 May 07
i would not mind if a child came to me asking me for help. i would rather they came to me then to their friends who don't have enough life experience to assist. i would encourage them to talk to their parents, but if they feel that they can not, then i would do what i can to help.
• Philippines
7 May 07
I don't have children right now but if ever i will have as parent i should be the one to find ways that my children will be comfortable with me like having more time with them. i will teach them how to express there ideas, problem in life and some topic that can help them grow mentally, physically and spiritually. it's just a matter of communication and as parents we should be the one to adjust to our children. Yes, I will allow them to go to someone else advice as long as it will do good to them and i must first know what kind of person they want to share with there problems.:)
2 people like this
• United States
6 May 07
I try to keep an open relationship with my kids. At the moment, that means I know a LOT of 5th grade gossip. I think my kids feel comfortable talking to me about most things, but I also want them to have other safe adults who share my values. Sometimes kids are just embarrassed to talk to mom or dad, and a little distance makes it easier. My sister or sil are two people I'd be very happy to have my kids ask for advice. I hope my nieces and nephews will be comfortable coming to me if they are nervous to talk to their parents, also.
2 people like this
@castleghost (1304)
• United States
6 May 07
I have a wonderful relationship with my sons. Both know that they can come to me about anything and that I will not judge them. I will help them the best that I can. Its best to have an open and honest relationship with your children. Always remain calm in front of them. Let them know that yes it sometimes is difficult to hear but you would rather them come to you with their problems so that you can help out.
2 people like this
@yuliahar (18)
• Indonesia
6 May 07
yes..yes..yes.. with touch of love they will confidence and comfort talk about everything.
@tinamwhite (3255)
• United States
9 May 07
While I have always had an "open-door" policy to any subject in my house....I have had numerous discussions with my children regarding every subject I can think of....but I guess if they were not comfortable talking to me about something I would want them to have somewhere to turn....I mean that the advice that they would get from their peers probably is not the best advice for them...this is a tough one.....I am not aware of anything that my children could not or would not tell me.....having raised 3 children to their late 20's...plus my 5 yr old and grandchildren I have heard alot!!......and will continue to do so.
• United States
10 May 07
Thanks for awarding me "best response".
1 person likes this
@KissThis (3008)
• United States
19 May 07
You deserved it hun.
@cherriemae (3375)
• Philippines
19 May 07
my daughter is only 2 yrs old, and i hope that when the time that she's already know things around her and already know how to talk things to me, i hope that she will share everything to me..i wanted to be friend to my daughter, so i will know if she has a problem or if she's already have a crush or a boyfriend..i wanted to know what's going on to her so that i will how to protect her..
1 person likes this
@windhair (498)
• Germany
10 May 07
I do met such things sometime. But it is not about my daughter, she is only 4 years, she always try to make me understand what she has done in kindergarden. But I met some children, they want to ask me for help, or tell me something as a secret in their family. Some of them are so cute. And I believe they just meet the similar situation which they do not want to share with their parents, because it is a kind of secret their parent can not totally agree or to close to give a desired answer. They also refuse to discuss it with their friends, since it maybe a private thing can only be talk among a family number. At last, they find me, who has a very close realtionship with the family, but much less restriction for what they act and talk. I enjoy to be a friends of the children, they are so cute.
1 person likes this