I have a real Dillema here What to do

@wenfri (1188)
Canada
May 11, 2007 12:53pm CST
Oh gosh I am in such a state here. Hubby just called about hit Dad. I am positive I shouldn't post it here but didn't what to do. My in-law(out law) Is on the verge of losing his home. Hasn't been paying the morgage, taxes or anything. He gets a great pension but instead of paying bills he drinks it away Somehow within my bones I know he is going to end up here. Don't get me wrong he is family but I really don't like the man. He has changed sooo much since his wife passed away. He really hasn't liked me since we got married and that was 33 years ago. What am I going to do. HOw do I tell my hubby I don't want him here. Once he gets in he'll never get out I just know it Advice please Wendy
1 person likes this
4 responses
• United States
11 May 07
Maybe your sweating for nothing, you said he didn't like you, so maybe, with any luck it won't even come up. If your husband realizes his drinking is a real problem, maybe he won't even mention it. On the other hand if it does come up, sometimes we just have to grin and bear it to keep peace. I've never been too great about keeping the peace, usually if there is something on my mind I blurt it out, then feel bad afterwards for being so incensitive. Sorry I couldn't be more help. Don't worry it will work out.
3 people like this
@wenfri (1188)
• Canada
11 May 07
I sure hope I am sweating for nothing Me too I mean bad a voicing my own opinions Sometimes I feel bad after wards and then there I times I don't I pray it works out too Thanks for your encouragement Wendy
1 person likes this
@Sherry12 (2475)
• United States
11 May 07
Oh Wendy you do have a problem. Don't even make any comments about him staying with you. Maybe you can suggest to your hubby a senior citizen place where they will cook his meals and there will be other people around him to play cards and talk to. If your husband brings up him living with you, tell him you've been looking forward to having time to spend with him alone, now that your kids are growing up. I agree with you, that once he moves in he will never leave. Good luck and let us know what happens.
2 people like this
@wenfri (1188)
• Canada
12 May 07
He may be old (76) but definitely isn't feeble He would never agree to a senior's place. He still works wiht my hubby on a par time basis. He is healthy and active. Our kids are already grown up and moved out. Been quite a few years now. Just not sure how everything is going to work Guess it is called a waitng game now. Keep every one posted and up to date Wendy
1 person likes this
@TerryZ (22083)
• United States
11 May 07
Hi there wenfri boy this certainly is a big one. First thing you must do is have the talk with the hubby and tell him how your feeling about this situation. And ask him what he thinks about. Then go from there. But you both your hubby and you have to talk about it.Maybe you can put him in somekind of a home. Ha? Good idea?
@wenfri (1188)
• Canada
11 May 07
A good idea I will definitely discuss it with my hubby. I am sure he already know how I feel about things though Put him in a home Good thought but won't work. He may be slightly ofer 75 but still works part time, drives and rides his bike. Still looks a women young enough to be his grandkids Nope the home idea won't work. Besides they won't allow him to smoke in there Thanks for responding though Wendy
• United States
6 Jun 07
Have you thought about a assisted living home. They are homes where the person can come and go as they please. There is a nurse on duty so if they should need help there is help right there. This was put here four weeks ago so I don't know if the situation has been remedied or not. I hope so and I hope to your satisfaction and your husband. It would be different if you and your husbands father got along.
1 person likes this
@wenfri (1188)
• Canada
6 Jun 07
The old fart would not even think about assisted living He takes advice from no one but himself and maybe my hubby(son) Which I might add gets tosses out as soon as he leaves. I hoping by supper time today the issue will be resolved one way or the other. If it goes the other way we aren't going to my nephews wedding but staying home and moving him Not here either I don't care where he goes but not here. We used to get along but with his ignorant, rude and belittling comments over the years I have lost respect for him. Thank you ever so much for expressing your thoughts and feelings I truly do appreciate it wendy