Dear Blabby...Bad advice

United States
May 12, 2007 10:52am CST
A couple of years ago, a co worker from a different department than I, was struggling with her head nurse. There were some real personality conflicts, and what I believe to have been some abuse of authoritative powers. My friend talked to me endlessly about the situation and I finally advised her to go over her head nurses head, and report her to human resources. My friend did just this in a moment of weakness and anger, but what ensued, was nothing less than a total train wreck. It only made matters worse and within a week, my friend was fired for insubordination. I felt perfectly awful, I knew the chain of command and the steps to take to resolve issues such as this, but that was not my advice. I spoke with malice instead, and it cost a co worker her job. Have you ever given someone bad advice only to have them follow it? Or have you been given advice that was tantamount to disaster? Tell me about it.
3 people like this
4 responses
@rusty2rusty (6751)
• Defiance, Ohio
15 May 07
If I have given bad advice. I have never heard about it later. When I talk with family and friends. I tell them that this is advice that I give you. You can take or leave. It will not bother me either way. But you and you alone have to live with the choices you make. Not me. Don't feel bad about what happen to your friend. As you tried to help. It was her choice not to follo wthe chain of command. So she has to live with consquences of her actions.
1 person likes this
• United States
15 May 07
Thanks Rusty, you are right that she was the one that went against the chain of command, but in my anger I was the one that advised her to do so. I do regret that decision, and she does not harbor ill will towards me, she now has a job that she is more satisfied with so I suppose that is one good thing out of that debacle.
1 person likes this
@kprofgames (3091)
• United States
24 Jan 09
This is a rather old thread, but sill a good one. I think it's too easy to let our frustrations override rational thinking. We do make mistakes, we do give bad advice. Some times it's easier to give way to just being mad then clearly walking in the steps we need to. Yes, I've given bad adice, received my fair share of it too. I think after a time we need to put our emotions aside and look outside of the box. Not make it personal. There is where I get most of my answers from. I'll take pc's of what people said here and there, but to honestly look at it, I need to do with without emotion.
• United States
25 Feb 09
Wow thank you for finding this one. When I wrote it i felt it was important. Time has passed now. Blabby is still so important. I am still the same person I was when i wrote this.
@eaforeman6 (8979)
• United States
12 May 07
YOU CANT BLAME YOURSELF FOR THE ADVICE. the chain of command is the normal way to go. It just didnt work the out in this case...I am very picky about giving advice because of the consequnces...When your friend or loved one needs help , then you will try to do your best..
• United States
14 May 07
Oh I have gotten over it, for me I do take responsibility for what comes out of my mouth. For one thing my mouth is open most all of the time, and what comes out is normally the first thing that pops into my mind, and sometimes that is venom or anger. I find myself doing a lot of back tracking in those cases. Thank you so much for commenting.
1 person likes this
@eaforeman6 (8979)
• United States
17 Oct 08
Thanks for the best response! Happy My lotting!