What's the best way to deal with a neighbor...

@maddysmommy (16243)
United States
May 14, 2007 1:49am CST
who always asks for a favor but can never help you out? I have an issue with my neighbor who constantly asks me to help in things to do in her home and storage compartments. I just don't know how she coped before I arrived on the scene. I'm sure her husband helped her out all the time now I'm getting calls from her every couple of days asking if I can help her out with household stuff. Her recent request was to help her out with their storage unit as her husband has just spent 6 hours cleaning it out and doesn't have the energy to do anymore so is asking if I can do it ?!? I don't mind helping out but if the husband is capable, why do they need me? he can always continue it the next day right? or am I being selfish and should offer to help out anyway? It's now becoming a habit as opposed to asking for help now and then and I feel I may be taken advantage of. What do you think? Should I just let it be and just help them out when ever they need it? I have only known them for 5-6 months now.
2 people like this
5 responses
@whyaskq (7553)
• Singapore
14 May 07
Perhaps you are one nice person whom she trusted and know can be relied on or taken for granted :P If it is once or twice, I may help out. But frequently and becoming a habit, lol.... I will be ready for it. I would just find some excuse to get away. "I enjoy helping people, but I do not enjoy doing household chores. My own household chores are done by xxxxx, not me. So what will my xxxxx say if he finds out that I am helping you with the chores?" "I have this..... to finish before certain timing. I don't think I can help." The above are some excuses I think I will use :P
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@maddysmommy (16243)
• United States
14 May 07
I think sometimes I am overly nice and don't mind from time to time in helping others if they really need the help. It's now becoming more of a habit as they are both in their 50's and I'm 36 so?!? He works during the day and she stays home, so when she can't do anything she calls me. I know she means well and I may take you up on one or two of your excuses LOL :P
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@whyaskq (7553)
• Singapore
15 May 07
It's good to give a helping help when possible.... Perhpas she just need some company.
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@mrbranan (1012)
• United States
14 May 07
I think they are taking advantage of you. I would tell them next time they ask that I was busy and can't do it. There is no crime in not doing things from your neighbor. It is alright to tell them no every once in a while.
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@maddysmommy (16243)
• United States
15 May 07
Yes I think so too. I will tell them next time if I am busy ;)thanks for your response mrbranan!
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• India
14 May 07
I think you need to tell them the problems and difficulties that you face at your home. It's not that I'm telling you not to help, but help should be to a certain extent. The more you do, the more they ask. If you let them know your difficulties, I don't think that they'll ask for your help often. Help them once a while and be good to them. :)
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@maddysmommy (16243)
• United States
14 May 07
Thanks tipsntricks. I think it will do no harm if I talk to them nicely about how often they do ask me for help. I know the mean well but sometimes its just a little too much. Thanks for your response.
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@Rohit20 (327)
• India
15 May 07
To help them is your nature and to ask for help is their nature.As all humans have different nature.At this stage make them clear with politeness that it would not be possible for you to help them any more,otherwise in coming times they will continue to tease you like this.Unnecessary raising benefits seeing others constrains is incorect,now you have to make their strong desicion wheather to suffer or not.Make a middle mean by refusing gently.
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• Canada
15 May 07
Just politly say no adn if they persist then declien flatly they will get teh hint
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