Alzheimers and my Mom

United States
May 23, 2007 7:58am CST
My mom is in the final stages of Alzheimers Disease. For those of you who have lost a parent to this awful disease, how did you get through the funeral and all the services without falling apart? I'm a very emotional person and know how hard it will be. My mom has very little time left. She lives 1,000 miles away. We did have a family get together in March. I am at peace knowing she will soon be free of this awful disease. I need to find a way to be strong during the services. I cry at the drop of a hat.
6 people like this
3 responses
@Janny67 (10)
31 May 07
I am in the same position as you are at the moment love, my mum has had this terrible disease for 12 yrs and is now on Morphine and hasn't eaten for over a week, so I know it will not be long, but I am grateful for that in a way, I know you understand that, it's because we care so much that we don't want our loved ones to suffer. There is no set way of dealing with grief, everyone is different and nobody will think bad of you whichever way you react, I am a emotional person too and cry all the time about it, it's because you care and there's nothing wrong with that. You will get thru this eventually in your own way, don't worry about what others will think or how to react, you will be ok accept help and just try not to worry about it too much, time is a great healer as they say. My thoughts and best wishes are with you.
• United States
7 Jun 07
How is your mom now? I'm sorry to say that my mom passed away last Thursday :( Actually, I suppose it is a relief because I know now that she is free of the disease. She held on a long time, she was very tough.
1 person likes this
7 Jun 07
I am so sorry about your mom, as you say it is a relief but that doesn't help does it? My mum passed away last night at the care home, I didn't get there in time, so now I feel guilty for that, I will be thinking of you and my best wishes to you, you will get thru this just like I will, but it is so hard. Jan xx
2 people like this
• United States
7 Jun 07
Oh please don't feel guilty. I'm sure your mom knew how much you loved her. I actually didn't want to go to the hospital and see my mom because I didn't want that image of her to be my last. I hope that makes sense! All my brothers and sister had gone to see her and doctors were amazed that she was still alive, all her organs pretty much shut down, etc. They said she must be waiting for someone. My sister called me and asked me to please go see my mom, even though she knew how hard it was for me. My husband and I did go that night and the following morning she passed. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
1 person likes this
@misheleen73 (6037)
• United States
23 May 07
I am so sorry to hear about your mother. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. There is no certain way to get through something like that. Yes, you will cry, but you need to do that to heal. Let yourself feel all you need to feel when you need to feel it. I lost my grandparents very early in my childhood, and I never really grieved. I was trying to be the strong soldier for my baby cousin who had no clue what was going on. Bless you my friend. At least she will soon be free and you can have that knowledge.
2 people like this
• Canada
8 Jun 07
I'm so sorry to hear about your mom and am the same as you in that I get upset very easily . I have not been through anything like this as of yet but feel that my husband's mother may be in the very beginning stages but we don't know this for sure yet . She forgets simple things like what the sugar is called or the name of a fork or spoon and has a hard time remembering simple things . My friend deals with a lot of people that have Alzheimers and says it is definitley possible and that if she does have it that I won't be able to handle her and will have to put her in a home but I wouldn't want to do this . I have heard it is extremely hard to deal with and my heart goes out to you . Try holding on to the fact that you know that your mother will be in a better place and don't worry about falling apart because this is your right . She is your mother and this only shows that you care . This will be expected and no one will think any less of you if you do fall apart . I wish I had more to offer but don't really know what more I can say to take away your pain . Take Care !!
1 person likes this