What can you do when reality bites you in the backside?
By recycledgoth
@recycledgoth (9894)
May 31, 2007 6:24am CST
First of all I must apologies to all my friends, I have not been about for a few days due to a *reality check* and I may well be away again for a few more days. Things have not gone well in the goth house recently, I have been trying to juggle chainsaws in an attempt to be in four places at once and deal with all the problems in one go. Trust me, it's not possible.
My car is currently off the road, it needs service, MOT and insurance - none of which I can currently afford to pay for.
My parents are sick, they live a long way from me and the train fares are too expensive.
The water tank in the loft sprang a leak last week and we had water gushing through the ceiling into the bedroom, ruining the ceiling, the bed, the carpets etc.
My partner gashed his hand while trying to fix the water tank leak, he's a guitarist and this has meant we have had to pull out of a couple of gigs which would have paid us quite well.
I won't go on, suffice it to say, things are not good right now.
However, on the upside, I have managed to convince a friend of mine to do the work on the car for me and get the MOT sorted out, and he has also offered to pay for the insurance for the year.
Once the car is back on the road I can drive down to see my parents.
The water tank is covered under the house insurance and we had the insurance assessor over on Tuesday and he says we have a full claim and should get that sorted very soon.
My partner's hand should heal without damage to his fingers, although it will take some time.
So I wonder, people, what do you do when life turns around and bites you in the back side? Do you stand there and take it? Do you bite back? How do you cope with the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.
8 people like this
16 responses
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
31 May 07
First of all, glad to see you back..hey, it's been too quiet here without you!
My this has been a real time of it for you...to put it mildly..and it seems so many of us here are going through some weird cycle...
So what do I do when life turns around and kicks me in the butt? I keep moving on...keep moving on and try to come up with solutions to combat my problems--in other words I fight back somehow
2 people like this
@recycledgoth (9894)
•
1 Jun 07
LOL - too quiet? *giggles* I've had my screaming stage and my miserable stage, now I'm feeling a lot more positive.
You are right, this seems to have been one of those *bad* cycles lately, a lot of my friends have had troubles too. I'm hoping that by the time of the Summer Solstice, things will ease up and the good times will roll again
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
1 Jun 07
Well my bad cycle has seemed to have ended--maybe it had something with it being the full blue moon last night...now I'm so happy I'm doing a dance all the while, while my cats look at their mom really strangely--LOL
1 person likes this
@cpclos (24)
• United States
31 May 07
Im really sorry to hear this, life is hard especially at times like this. You stand strong, dont panic, set your priorities and put your life in perspective and your going to make it through it. At the end there i read that your friend is fixing the car and paying for insurance, you see theres a start. Just hang in there your gonna be ok.
2 people like this
@recycledgoth (9894)
•
1 Jun 07
I'm hanging in by my fingernails right now but things are going to get better. thanks hun
@whiteheather39 (24403)
• United States
31 May 07
You are really under a black cloud. Poor you! When life does me dirty I just suck it up and keep going because I know there will soon be a silver lining.
2 people like this
@recycledgoth (9894)
•
1 Jun 07
I'm looking for the silver lining hun, so far the clouds are still pretty grim but there is a glimmer of hope. At least the insurance will cover the damage and a new water tank. The car should be sorted out next week too.
@MsTickle (25180)
• Australia
1 Jun 07
I've had a string of things too. At the beginning of summer my air conditioner broke down. The electrician was travelling out here to do repairs for someone else so I asked him to call in to me as well. Pulling apart the unit on the roof, he comes down off his ladder and says "it can't be fixed...that'll be $75 dollars thanks." I took my car to be repaired. Thought I'd be away over night, turned into 6 days and $1100 dollars for repairs and I still have the same problem.
You sound to be in control and dealing with things....good for you..I sense you being as positive as possible under the circumstances. This is how I like to be but lately I seem to be crumpling into a heap after hitting a brick wall. LOL.
I guess I'm standing here and taking it but I don't know what else to do. You hire tradesmen and mechanics and pay them for their time and "work" and you get ripped off. Where are their ethics?
@recycledgoth (9894)
•
1 Jun 07
*hugs* I have a screensaver that I often put onto my computer which simply says "The light at the end of the tunnel is an on-coming train"
I must admit that I don't like being at the mercy of tradesmen sometimes, if you get a good one then fine but some of them are rip off merchants. I hope things get better for you soon hun
1 person likes this
@mummymo (23706)
•
31 May 07
That is a HUGE reality check sweets - no wonder you have not been here! I hope your parents get better really quick, the insurance get the work done as quickly as possible, and as well as getting the car back on the road that your partners hand heals quickly and you can get back to doing some rockin gigs again! I will remember you all in my prayers - espescially you as I am sure you could do with some peace! How would I cope - have you heard of Prozac! lol xxx
1 person likes this
@recycledgoth (9894)
•
31 May 07
Mmmmmmmm Prozac sounds pretty good to me right now - lol Jay has several stitches in his hand and feels very low right now, hopefully it shouldn't take too long to heal up though. I am worried about my parents but I know I can't get down to see them immediately, phone calls don't quite have the same effect. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers sweetheart, that means a lot to me
1 person likes this
@recycledgoth (9894)
•
31 May 07
I will figure out how to get one of his tracks available so I can post a link for you hun. Thanks again.
@Woodpigeon (3710)
• Ireland
31 May 07
Oh poor Goth, that is a bad few days indeed! I'm glad all the problems havea more or less ok outcome. Did your partner have to get stitches and the whole shebang?
I ususally have a good tizzy fit or a burst of tears and get it all out of my system when tihngs go wrong. After that, I knuckle down and start trying to come up with solutions. I think in my house the main thing is not to panic, and if you are going to freak out, only one person is allowed to freak out at a time, and one way or another we manage to muddle through.
@recycledgoth (9894)
•
31 May 07
Jay has some stitches in his hand, and feeling very sorry for himself right now. It would have been a good weekend for us as the gigs were Friday and Saturday nights and paying too. Oh well, it's his turn to freak now, I did mine earlier in the week when the water cascaded down - lol
1 person likes this
@mimpi1911 (25464)
• India
1 Jun 07
how about this one...
i have some money left in the wallet to buy food for myself and the little 5 yr old who await my return and wave frantically.
i can't fight the disease and recent breakup but i know for sure that my family is there always with open arms to greet me.
i know i can't fulfill my dreams of studying further and be someone but i can still chase it..
i know my grandma would not come back to me but i can still contemplate the happy times with her..
and i know one day i might get bankrupt and sick but that doesn't stop me from living and living with a fist full of hope..
1 person likes this
@feralwoman (2199)
• Australia
31 May 07
Not a great time in the Goth household by the sounds of it. It never rains but it pours. Things usually go wrong in threes, so it's really bad luck to have a foursome. I'm glad things are slowly getting sorted for you especially the full insurance claim being covered. How kind of your friend to get your car sorted too. That surely must be a friend to treasure.
When life bites me on the bum, I bite it right back! I may not be in a good mood, but I don't curl up in a ball in the corner! Must be because i'm a stubborn Scorpio!
Good luck to you and hope your parents get well soon. lol ;)
@recycledgoth (9894)
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1 Jun 07
Thanks hun, I must admit I have felt like curling up into a little ball and hiding in a corner lately but, like you, I am stubborn and won't let it get to me too much. Things will get better :-)
@rhinoboy (2129)
•
31 May 07
Sometimes life throws us all a set of problems that just knock us off our feet. I'm sure you'll cope by dealing with things as they come and turning things around one at a time.
The trick I've found to stop it getting on top of me is to get away, even if only for a day or just a few hours. Personally, I like fishing. Somehow it makes me forget everything else while I wait for the fish to tug on the line or take down the float. I can just enjoy the scenery and completely empty my head.
Obviously that isn't to everyone's taste, but the idea is universal. Forget it all for a while then return, refreshed to deal with some more problems.
Here's wishing you some stress-free time and plain sailing.
Rhino.
1 person likes this
@recycledgoth (9894)
•
31 May 07
I think our plan for the weekend will be getting the rest of the bedroom sorted out again, at least we have a cheap week holiday coming up in June :-) Thanks hun, stress-free time would be good
@netbuster (99)
• India
31 May 07
My favorite song is "One day at a time sweet Jesus, that's all I'm asking from you. Give me the strength to do every day what I have to do."
This helps to fend off disappointments or letdowns.
1 person likes this
@perrygunight (555)
• United States
3 Jun 07
It sounds like things are improving. I was a bit worried when you hadn't written anything, and am sorry to hear of your bad luck. I've had plenty of the same, and can definitely feel your pain. Isn't there an old Greek saying about pain helping us appreciate it when we feel good, hunger helping us appreciate good food, something like that? Or was it just that absence makes the heart grow fonder of when things are going well? Oh yeah, your question. I don't bite back. I just slog through whatever sh*t gets in the way, cleaning up afterwards.
1 person likes this
@recycledgoth (9894)
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4 Jun 07
LOL - just slogging through it all at the moment, but biting back too hun. At least the insurance policy covers the water tank. :-)
@Bizziebod (3497)
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4 Jun 07
Hi, personally I think these things come along to test you in away, to remind you that when you have good times you will appreciate them more. Not sure if that makes sense but when I've been in situations similar to yours I keep reminding myself that it's got to get better in the end and also that you can get through the worst of situations if you just keep your head. Hope everything gets more positive for you soon...
1 person likes this
@recycledgoth (9894)
•
5 Jun 07
Thanks hun, this certainly has been a trying time just lately but I am remaining as optimistic as possible.
@twilight021 (2059)
• United States
31 May 07
Wow! I'm so sorry to hear that you have been having such a bad streak of luck. But it soulnds like you are taking things step by step and are getting back on track.
I think that really that's all you can do. Some thigns are out of your control...illness, accidents and the like...but what you can do it try to anticipate things. It's great that you have insurance that covers the hot water leak, and it was also great that you have friends who can help you with your car...and that you knew to ask for help. That is somtimes my problem, I don't know when to ask for help and let myself get overwhelmed.
I would say the best thing to do it try to anticipate what you can...and for those things you can't take them step by step, and don't be scared to use your friends and family as resources for help. That's what I try to do at least.
1 person likes this
@recycledgoth (9894)
•
31 May 07
Although I have never found it easy to ask for help. sometimes you just have to. I'm fortunate in that the insurance was up to date on the house really, and getting the car fixed up will be a big weight off my shoulders and I know I will be able to pay him back soon.
thanks for your words hun
@recycledgoth (9894)
•
3 Jun 07
I like to think I can fight back, and most of the time I do fight hard. I guess just lately everything has crashed down onto my shoulders, but with the support I have found here, I am bouncing back now :-)
@Tetchie (2932)
• Australia
31 May 07
well I usually brush off the knees and keep going. I'd probably get angry first, curse about how much it costs but feel really good when things get back into some form of order. I often take mishaps and misfortunes as lessons and look at what things are going wrong in my personal/emotional life. Usually there is something not flowing in me that causes the outward problems. Then again it could just be white ants!
1 person likes this
@recycledgoth (9894)
•
31 May 07
Yup, I got angry and felt like hitting the walls. Now I'm just dealing with everything as it comes along. You are right, it could just be white ants - lol
