twins!!!! any advice???

United States
June 4, 2007 3:17pm CST
OK so i found out that i was pregnant. It came as a pretty big shock to me for i wasnt sure on wether or not i wanted another child. ( i have a 6 year old daughter) Whom is the light of my life and i adore more than anything. The thing is i never really was much of a "child" person. I adjusted and grew to be overjoyed with my daughter and i wouldnt have had it any other way. Well when i found out i was pregnant again. My husband was thrilled and my daughter was excited enough for the both of us. Truth is i was so overwhelmed ...shocked... really. I had so many mixed feelings i wasnt disapointed and i wasnt over excited either. I was just OH MY...REALLY? well it took some time and i began to adjust to the pregnancy. I just started acceptoing the fact that i am going to have another child.YAY! WELL... went to the doctors.... the morning sickness was too much to handle. I didnt get sick with my first child. I didnt have all these muscualr pains. I feel horrbile. BUT i do not feel pregnant. So after a complete physical and every thing. My Doctor decided to give me an ultra sound.... Well turns out theres a big reason for all the morning sickness and extra aches and pains... we found out i dont have A baby im having TWO babies!!! I began to tear up a bit. three children in all... is this really happening. i was in complete shock. I couldnt belive it. Part of me still cant belive it. I dont know any one who has twins ... is there any one out there who has twins or knows any one who does? any advice or precaution info etc. anything would be greatly appreciated! thank you
4 people like this
15 responses
@megs85 (3145)
• Australia
4 Jun 07
I've just found out I am having twins, possibly triplets :O I think I swore at the sonographer when he told me lol- I was like "NO F*ing WAY! WHATTT??!" Its the shock. I'm still only early on in the pregnancy, a couple o fmonths, but yeah I knew after a week- the morning sickness (all day sickness lmao) and just feeling like Ive been hit by a truck constantly- sure you understand what I mean ;) My son is only 1! He'll be 20 months when these lil ones come along and I'm 21. I'll be 22 with 3 kids under 2. SO yes, I can completely relate to how scared you must be feeling. We were planning on one, but two is exciting and scary all at the same time. I bet you feel some of the same things I do- the fear of how am I gonna cope? What am I gonna do? WHat if What if What if?? Please keep me updated on everything and congrats on your bubs'... looks like we'll be due around the same time, could be a good support...
@megs85 (3145)
• Australia
4 Jun 07
Forgot to mention, twins run in my family, my maternal grandfather was a twin, and my half sister by my dad has twins, so I got a double whammy in the poossiblity stakes lol...
2 people like this
• United States
4 Jun 07
Thank you so much for the comment.. Im glad that im not alone...LOL OH YES can definalty relate to what your saying. I know why do they call it morning sickness i too get it allll day!! LOL ill keep you posted ... you do the same!!
1 person likes this
• Philippines
5 Jun 07
you will surely find it difficult to be coping taking care of three kids at the same time. your eldest will still be very demanding of your time when the twins come. i hope that you can find a good help taking care of them as they will all be growing up and the demands for attention and care will shoot up, too.
@makingpots (11922)
• United States
4 Jun 07
First of all, congratulations. Look at the bright side, now you know why you were feeling so much worse. :) You will do fine, your daughter will probably be the greatest big sister ever and someday you wont even remember these feelings of being overwhelmed. I have a friend with twin boys and it is doable for sure! Surround yourself with support. Check online for moms groups of multiples and if there aren't any in your area then start one. Multiples are happening more often (it seems) so there is likely to be others in your area who would flock to a support group. Meetup.com is a good place to start especially if you have to start one yourself. Everything happens for a reason. Apparently you deserve to be double-y blessed!!! You will be fine!
1 person likes this
@makingpots (11922)
• United States
29 Jun 07
thank you for the best response.
@toe_ster (771)
• United States
4 Jun 07
There is a couple of plus sides with having multiples. You get more for the time of one. You get two babies with one pregnancy I mean. I for one hated being pregnant. Didn't mind the labor/delivery so much, just the 9long months part. Another plus you will get to experience things one time and not twice. ( I am thinking of it like having two morekids at differnet times than at once) You will get double the pleasures.They have an instant friend/playmate. Your older daughter will get more siblings. Sometimes you can get a discount on baby things. I really thinjk it is more a positive than negative. I can see why you would be feeling the way you feel. Make sure to talk to the doctor about depression and postpartum. Not saying you are. Just trying to take precaution. Just make sure you have a good support system just as you would for having one child, except you might need the support team a little bit more. Especially at first. Once they get a bit older and you establish a routine, it won't be so bad. My sister had twins they are now 8. I was part of that support team. I was only 16 at the time and was partially raisning them.After a while my sister git better (she was really sick) and she went back home with the twins. She had a daugter at home that was 17 mos. I know it was probably hard, but she had another one of my sisters close by going to college and some cousins going to school close by too. They allcame over and helped out. It is always overwhelming at first with a newborn, but it passes. Your family is growing congratulation. My advice, get a lot of rest and get a good support team ready. You will do fine. You will probably like it more than you think. Congrats and good luck!
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Jun 07
thank you so much for your kind and caring words. i have a huge family and all are ready and willing to do whatever they can to help out.I just hope that i am not shy to ask for the help as i was with my daughter. It wasnt due to pride or being ashamed it was more of a disappointment in myself i felt if i asked for the help ( efven though i knew it was there) i was letting my baby girl down. I think that im already over that feeling!! LOL. thank you@!
4 Jun 07
Congrats.Just make sure u rest properly and dont lift heavy object.i wish u a safe delivery
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Jun 07
thank you very much!! I cant lift anything my husband would go blastic!! LOL im lucky to be able to lift the milk jug at dinner time!! LOL thanks again
• United States
4 Jun 07
I don't have any advice as I'm not even a mother yet, but oh oh OH! Congratulations to you and your family! Twins! There's one pair of twins in family but they practically don't even count, one is super tall and dark and very strong, the other is very short and light skinned and very petite. It's so funny when they tell people they are twins! I love it. Anyway, congrats again! I would love to have twins one day :D
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Jun 07
Thank you so much!!
• Canada
5 Jun 07
you are so very lucky that this happened in your six year olds life at this point, she will be the best helper you could have, she may develope a love for one more than the other, but will grow to love each the same. she's the big sister, the one who will protect those two, from anything she has the power to do so. a very great learning experience is about to begin. include your daughter in everything to do with the twins, from feeding to bathing, remember she has been the only little person in your life to this point. don't make her take a back seat, get her involved from the start. motherly instincts are not instincts. they have to be taught. best of wishes. god be with you
1 person likes this
• Philippines
5 Jun 07
i never had twins although i had always wished that i had a set at least. i can understand your feelings about having another baby and the qualms coming in that you are having two at that. there is nothing really to fear. rather, be overjoyed. having twins is a blessing in itself. they will be growing up just like your first child. it will only be a matter of having to double up everything since there are two of them. when the kids are out, the joys that you will be feeling just by looking at them is coming up beyond measure.
• United States
4 Jun 07
No, I haven't had twins, but two of my husbands brothers had twins. I also have a friend who had 3 boys and decided to try for a girl, guess what? She had twin girls, at the age of 25 she had 5 kids! I know that right now it must be a shock, but it is a miracle,too. I think that you will adjust and that you will be happy once they are here. I know that they are a lot of work, I also have a young neice who has twin boys, that I help with every chance I get. It can be a handful, you better start building a support team of friends and family members to help in the beginning. Take offers for help with the house, with cooking, anything that they offer. You will find out that you will need the extra hands. I congratulate you and wish you and your family the best of luck! Keep us posted.
1 person likes this
@re08dz (1941)
• Australia
4 Jun 07
Ahh yes - I know the feeling well. I remember going to the doctor and then being sent to have an ultrasound cause things didn't seem right (my size versus how far along in my pregnancy) so I rang my husband and he and my son met me at the ultrasound place - the guy put the thing on my stomach and then asked me if I knew what we were looking at - two heads. I was in shock but in all honesty it wore off reasonably quickly - even though there are no twins in our families at all. Having twins, while a scary thought, isn't as hard or twice as much trouble as you might think. Yes you're in a higher risk category when you're pregnant and the chance of needing a c-section increases (I had mine naturally) but once they're born you adjust really quickly. While you do need to double up on things and have to chance twice as many nappies the rest isn't that much different. My girls are 12 now and I figure if I can survive it anyone can :-)
@34momma (13895)
• United States
4 Jun 07
i personally don't have twins but they do run in my family. and the best thing you can do is try and find some family members who would not mind coming in for the first few weeks and help out until you get a routine down. breath, relax, and don't stress. make sure you husband is involved in everything. just know in your heart that this is a blessing and you can handle anything. i promise you will find a way to fit two more little ones into your heart and family. you are going to be just fine. i never thought i wanted children either and i have three of the most wonderful children any women could ever want.
• Philippines
5 Jun 07
I would love to have twins. In our country, twins are cute beings & people are always fond of them. But I know the difficulties of carrying twins. A friend told me her experience. But I guess Western women are more capable in carrying twins because they are bigger in built, compared to Asians who are smaller in size, if you could just imagine... Anywayz, goodluck with the pregnancy and congratulations!!
@shestalou (293)
• Canada
5 Jun 07
I am a mommy of 4, my oldest daughter is 13, my second son was born with special needs and my twins are seven years old, boy and girl. It was a shock when I found out but exciting at the same time, it can be over whelming at first but it is so neat to see their relationship develop over time, they always have a playmate, and a fight mate, lol, but they always look out for each other.
@abrarr (1246)
• Pakistan
5 Jun 07
i'm not married so sorry i can't prove to b helpful but 1 thing from my side...HURRRAAAYYY!! may u live long and happy with ur children!!
@squaretile (3833)
• Singapore
5 Jun 07
sorry I don't have any great advice cos I don't have kids, but just to say take good care of yourself! Having twins is challenging cos you might not get aNY sleep the whole night. So hoping that your hubby will rise up to the challenge and totally pull his weight when the kids come out! We all need help in this! pregnancy is a two person thing, not just a one person endeavour! all the best dear and keep us posted!
@leelmj (5)
• China
4 Jun 07
first congratulations to you and your famliy i want a baby, better if i can have twins. it is a fantastic thing imaging you will have the same look baies. wow, so miracle! love them!