Guilty by association

United States
June 4, 2007 5:40pm CST
As adults we are all responsible for our own actions. We can not control what another adult says or does but because we are either friends with or married to the person in question you are guilty of the same crime? How is this fair? To me this all seems like a bunch of high school non-sense! When do these type of accusers grow-up and stop playing that game? Has this ever happened to you?
3 people like this
5 responses
@lecanis (16664)
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
5 Jun 07
It happened to me in terms of family members. I've often been accused of being a bad person because I come from a bad family, as if it were my fault! It frustrates me to no end. I've even had people tell me I should not have children because I would abuse them like I was abused as a child, though thankfully no one has said this since I actually had my son. I did have a friend pretty much cut me off from himself over something another friend said to him for a while. I don't play those kinds of games, and I told him so. Either he would be my friend for my own sake, or not, and that was all there was to it. In this particular case, that approach worked.
2 people like this
• United States
6 Jun 07
I just isn't fair that people are so narrow-minded to think that just because it happened to you, you will repeat it.
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37383)
• United States
4 Jun 07
It has not happened to me personally but I have heard where this kind of thinking has destroyed lives. It's sad that society can't get past condemning people by association.
• United States
4 Jun 07
I hope it never does happen to you. Yes, it is sad that some people judge you based on who you associate with.
1 person likes this
@sacmom (14315)
• United States
8 Jun 07
This has never happened to me (not yet anyway). I don't think it's right that someone is instantly guilty just because their spouse or someone they know has committed a crime. In fact this is downright unfair! But I'm afraid that this nonsense will never end...unless of course officials like the president, judges, and the like have this happen to them. Then maybe things will change, though I wouldn't hold my breath. =/
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Jun 07
It isn't just crime and the higher officials that are guilty of doing this. Everyday people do it, I see it a lot. My oldest daughter was best friends with a lesbian so because of it other people were saying she was. She wasn't it because she was friends with her people just assumed. It just isn't fair.
• United States
6 Jun 07
I think it is sad that we are not looked at on our own merit. Just because you hang around with another person doesn't mean you are doing the same thing that she is. I am who I am and no one makes me do something that I don't want to do. I have been around friends in the past that wanted to do something that was not very nice to another person. I simply said no and walked away. They hollared after me that I could no longer hang around with them and all I did was say so be it and threw my hand up at them in a wave. Guilty by association is not true.
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Jun 07
People should not judge you based on what your friends do. When I was in high school I hung out with a rough crowd and they skipped school alot, I didn't but when they were called out on it and belittled by the teachers I was included in the group. It didn't seem fair then and as an adult I find the same thing going on.
@Woodpigeon (3710)
• Ireland
9 Jun 07
I am sure it has. For me the shoe is on the other foot. I had someone I considered to be a good friend, and we ave been friends for years. Any evidence to the contrary I have doggedly ignored, even when it was becoming difficult to do so. A month ago she said something I can't forget or forgive, and she has finally come to realise I am really upset with her and don't even want to talk about it or sort it out. I just don't want to do anything beyond the hi-bye when we run into each other. It is getting really akward for everybody else though, husbands, kids, mutual friends...I am not sure how it is going to work out!
1 person likes this