What would you do if your partner was dying?

@breepeace (3027)
Canada
June 18, 2007 6:49pm CST
A friend of mine has a close friend who is dating a man whose long-term girlfriend is dying of cancer in the hospital. I thought that sounded bizarre and a little cold of him to start the search for her replacement before she was even gone, but maybe I'm wrong? If someone's significant other is dying, can they see other people? What do you think? Is it not really cheating if you see other people and your significant other is dying of a terminal illness with no hope for recovery? Would you stay by their side until the bitter end, or would you say your goodbyes and move on, grieving on your own and leaving them to their final days with their family? What if they didn't want you to see them pass away and requested that you leave, even if you wanted to stay with them?
3 people like this
10 responses
@abrarr (1246)
• Pakistan
19 Jun 07
well i don't know what i'm gonna. i think the best to help her is to pray and to be with her as much as i can and help her to get out of the state of despair and show her that somebody is still there for her.
1 person likes this
@meljessxena (2319)
• Australia
19 Jun 07
if they requested me to leave i would follow their wishes and go away, but i wouldnt be able to find a replacement for my partner no way. i wouldnt even think about it, well and truely years after i think. the committment is still there i think
1 person likes this
@TerryZ (22085)
• United States
19 Jun 07
Hi breepeace if my husband were dying I would stay with him to the very end of his life. I would not be interested in finding someone else. That has always been a big fear of mine I dont want my husband to go before me.
@YoungInLove (1254)
• Canada
19 Jun 07
A few years ago my friends mother was dying of cancer when her dad found someone else. She was very upset and it crushed her. Im not sure if her mom knew or not but it was very disrespectful. I think that if you meet someone, you should keep it on the down low until the other person passes and the wounds have healed a bit, ot just makes everything harder to get over especially if the person has kids.
1 person likes this
@eaforeman6 (8983)
• United States
19 Jun 07
you just jump in and do what you can for this person. You be there for emotional support and to meet all their needs that you can possibly meet. My objective would be to make everything the most pleasant that is, possible. I would stay because of love.This just isnt the time to leave someone who you are with. I would say stay by their side untill the bitter end.
1 person likes this
@TriciaW (2441)
• United States
18 Jun 07
I would stay with the person till the end. I don't care if they told me to leave and never come back I would be sitting in the waiting room until they changed their mind. My sister was dying of cancer and she got into a big fight with my family at the hospital the nurses were instructed not to let any of them in except me and one other sister. When I knew my sister was reaching her final days I did not want it to end with the family that way so my other sister and I called the family to the hospital. I told the nurses what I was doing and to allow them in so amends could be made and they agreed. There was time for all the forgiveness to be given and all was well. We all sat with her through her final hours and I know it made everyone feel better even in a bad situation. So I believe what a dying person says one day is not what it really means. My sister loved her family and I am sure it was what my sister wanted deep in her heart. I guess if I knew a man that left and found me while someone he had been close to was dying myself I would never trust him because it seems like when the going gets tough he runs. Just my opinion though.
1 person likes this
@Beth84 (88)
• Philippines
19 Jun 07
I don't see anything wrong about it. He just seeing another girl and nothing happened right? Maybe his dying girlfriend wants to see his man to be happy. And she requested him to find another girl or whatsoever. Just like my Aunt who's dying because of some dreadful disease, she wants her husband to find someone who would love him and take good care of him before she left him. My aunt loves her husband so much and she don't wants her husband to be lonely.
@breepeace (3027)
• Canada
19 Jun 07
No, his dying girlfriend doesn't have a clue. Whenever she comes home for a little break, he tells the other woman he can't see her while she's home. They are sleeping together.
1 person likes this
@Beth84 (88)
• Philippines
19 Jun 07
Well, that's wrong! AS a friend, you can advise her that what she's doing now is a big mistake. Maybe she doesn't know about it, so try to communicate with her by heart.
@breepeace (3027)
• Canada
19 Jun 07
It's actually a friend of a friend, and my friend has already tried talking to her about it. Her take is that "She's dying anyway, so why can't he have a chance at happiness since it obviously won't be with her". She wouldn't be a friend of mine.
1 person likes this
• India
19 Jun 07
I think one shouldn't trust such a person he is rather too low for my taste.
• Pakistan
19 Jun 07
it is a very difficult stage to have. And i pray that sno one will face this situation it is so painfull dear. and no one canf express the real feelings at that time.
@KillBits (29)
• Uruguay
19 Jun 07
I stay by their side until the end... never dating whith other... but the people is rare sometimes