Share your Jokes here !
By dio123
@dio123 (1788)
India
June 21, 2007 2:56am CST
hi guys lets share here some jokes, sms quotes, one liners and all humor items here
To Start With I am posting this one:
A guy goes to a girl's house for the first time and she him into the living room. She excuses herself to go to the kitchen to make them a few drinks. As he was standing there alone, he notices a cute little vase on the mantel. He picks it up and as he's looking at it, she walks back in
He Say, "What this"?
She Says, "Oh, my father's ashes are in there"
He turns beat red in horror and goes, "Geez..... oh.. I..."
She Says, "Yeah, he's too lazy to go to the kitchen to get an ashtray."
2 people like this
3 responses
@Corezz (1013)
• Netherlands Antilles
21 Jun 07
OK I'll put a joke here.It's written in my language so I will translate to you I hope it's funny in english as it in mine:D:
Stundent versus Teacher
A student goes to the canteen and finds the only free spot was next to the teacher.
-Pig to the pigen is not his friend says the teacher. THe stundent says:
-Ok then I'm flyng out of here
Being nervous the teacher at the exam puts him the taffest questions but the student manages to answers all of them. At the end the teacher asks him:
-You see on the road a sac with money and another one with brains what do you chose?
-The one with money.
-I've tookt the one with brain. says the teacher....
-Everybody with what they need.
THe teacher geting very angry writes one his tes paper "jackass". THe student goes to him and say:
-Hey Mstr. Profesor you've signed, but didn't put my note on it.
Thanks very much!. Have a nice day! I hope you've like it.
@lena2000 (2392)
• Belgium
24 Aug 07
A blind man was describing his favorite sport, parachuting. When asked how this was accomplished, he said that things were all done for him: "I am placed in the door with my seeing eye dog and told when to jump. My hand is placed on my release ring for me and out I go with the dog."
"But how do you know when you are going to land?" he was asked. "I have a very keen sense of smell, and I can smell the trees and grass when I am 300 feet from the ground" he answered.
"But how do you know when to lift your legs for the final arrival on the ground?" he was again asked. He quickly answered: "Oh, the dog's leash goes slack."
1 person likes this
@zeeterman (1066)
• United States
21 Jun 07
An Eagle is circling at about 5,000 ft. when he spies a field mouse down
below him. He dives down and eats the mouse. After a little while the
mouse works his way out the eagles butt. Proceeding to look around the
mouse says: "Tail gunner to pilot...Tail gunner to pilot.."
The eagle says "what do you want?"
The mouse asks how high up they are.
The eagle thinks for a moment and then says "ohh about 5,000 ft."
The mouse then replies "You wouldn't be $hittin me now would ya??"
