Do you deny friends on my lot?

@sunshine4 (8703)
United States
June 21, 2007 10:05am CST
I have 66 pending friends that I have to approve or deny. I started to go threw them and approve those who I know respond to my discussions and I like the discussions they have started. I am wondering if anyone has denyed someone being a friend? I don't want to hurt anyones feelings, but there are some that I have absolutely nothing in common with. What do you do in these situations? I know that it is great to have lots of friends, but I like to participate in my friends discussions and some of these I would have nothing to contribute. Advice please?
8 people like this
24 responses
• Canada
21 Jun 07
I have only denied one person and that was a mistake , I meant to hit approve and hit deny by mistake . I felt really bad about this and even tried to find the person so I could explain that it was a mistake . I have noticed that there are a few that I don't answer to because like you I don't know how to answer their discussions but have noticed that if you add them , they will take the time to answer to a discussion you have started . Each of us have different interests but even when you feel you have nothing to add it doesn't mean that someone won't have something to add to a discussion that you start and this helps us out as well . So for this reason I don't refuse anyone who requests to be friends .
2 people like this
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
21 Jun 07
That is a great point. Even though I may not have anything in common with the person, they may have something to add to a discussion to help us out. Great insite!
1 person likes this
@aretha (2538)
• United States
25 Jun 07
i try and look at their discussions and see if they start discussions that i can respond to. i think there has been only once that i have denied anyone. i would feel bad if i denied them. if they start a bunch of dumb discussions then i just don't have it come to my email.
1 person likes this
@aretha (2538)
• United States
26 Jun 07
i do have most of my friends discussions come to my email but i was thinking of going through and changing that. i have a few freinds that start little one line nothing discussions and a lot each day. after going through them all i don't have a lot of time left to be here.
1 person likes this
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
26 Jun 07
I actually don't have all my friends discussions come to my email,only a select few (you are one of them:)) Every so often, I add more to come to my email and then I just search the others. I didn't deny anyone because I don't want them to think badly of me.
1 person likes this
@swatig (1183)
• India
22 Jun 07
My advice to approve all the pending friends as they might help you in one way or another. they help you in giving replies to your discussion and morever you got the chance to their profile and found out the best for you and also having chance to giving responses to their discussion. reading of discussion also helps you in starting the discussion. lots of friends makes you feel secure and if someof them in which nothing to contribute then also makes them friend as who know who are going to help you or going to give right advice at the time need. Suggestion only and do what you think is right.
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
22 Jun 07
I think that your advice is very just. Thank you for putting this into perspective for me. I did what you suggest:)
@swatig (1183)
• India
23 Jun 07
Thank you for your respect.:)
@Clemy21 (72)
• Uganda
22 Jun 07
well me i dont deny friends its only time that makes my life difficult because i have to reply to all of them. I do think you should accept them and also take the resposibility to know about them. Am telling you they will be of help to you.
1 person likes this
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
22 Jun 07
Thank you. I think that you are right. I am very anxious to get to know my new friends.
• United States
24 Jun 07
Yes, I do....all the time. And really the reason is that I like to respond to my friends posts at least once a week and I can't do that with hundreds of friends. I choose to "be-friend"people who have similar interests. I tend to go for people who are closer to my age as well.
1 person likes this
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
24 Jun 07
That makes total sense. Do you ever feel bad denying them? I think that is my problem, I would feel like I am hurting someones feelings.
• India
22 Jun 07
no i dont frankly speaking i dint get a chanse 2 deny bcoz i dint get any friend request till nw
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
22 Jun 07
I haven't requested any friends of my own except for one because I really liked his topics. The others requested me and I felt very flattered:) Keep posting and you will get lots of friend requests.
• India
22 Jun 07
No I always accept the frnd request and never deny any frnd request bcz if u have more frnds u will have gud chance of getting more and more responses of the discussions that u have started and u can also reply to more of frnds' discussions.
1 person likes this
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
22 Jun 07
Great advice, thanks.
@rusty2rusty (6751)
• Defiance, Ohio
22 Jun 07
I add anyone...after I start getting so many discussions I have nothing in common with or no clue what they are talking aboput. I select the option to NOT be notified by mail when they make a new discussion. This way if they ;ike what discussions I start they can answer them...Every so often I do go back through my friends I have selected no to recieve emails from. To see if tyhere are any discussions I might answer.
1 person likes this
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
22 Jun 07
I also select the option to not be notified of everyones discussions started. I then go threw the discussions my friends started link and respond that way. I think that the other way my email would get too overloaded.
@Ravenladyj (22904)
• United States
22 Jun 07
I deny ppl all the time....there is no point IMO of having 50000 friends on your list but only having common ground with 10 of them ya know....I periodically delete friends too actually if they end up not being active or not having any common interests as me and especially when they've not been in for weeks and weeks....
1 person likes this
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
22 Jun 07
Thank you for you take on this subject. I am thinking the more friends I have the more discussions from my friends to reply to.
• India
22 Jun 07
LOL!I never deny any friend request here on mylot.Because I read in one of the posts that it is advantageous to have more friends as it helps to get more responses to the discussions we start.So after that day I blindly accept all friend requests!
1 person likes this
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
22 Jun 07
That is a great point. I want more people to respond to my discussions and also have more discussions from friends to respond to.
@4cuteboys (4099)
• United States
22 Jun 07
I deny them if we dont have anything in common, or if they seem to be spammers or something like that. I feel bad denying people, but I figure it's better to do it now than if I added them and did it later.
1 person likes this
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
22 Jun 07
Thanks for your thoughts on this. I never thought of anyone here as a spammer.
@fengbo (731)
• China
22 Jun 07
No i don't deny any friends when they be approve.I think if i deny anyone,it will hurt he/she.If someone will add me as friend,i will agree with him request.I'd like to find many friends on mylot.I notice,they are have several thousands responses,they all have many friends,about hundreds of friends.Also they every discussions have the many response.I think it correlation they have so many friends.
1 person likes this
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
22 Jun 07
I don't want to hurt any feelings either. The more friends the better.
• Philippines
22 Jun 07
I do approve anyone, actually I keep on adding everyone who responds to my posts. Thanks
1 person likes this
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
22 Jun 07
That's a goood way to choose who you want as a friend. If they reply to your discussion, you at least have something in common.
• United States
22 Jun 07
I tend to look at the person's interest before I approve or deny them. So far, I've accepted every request I received for the people I have now are very intelligent and have alot of things in common with me (which is hard to find nowadays! xD )
1 person likes this
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
22 Jun 07
That is great that you have found friends that have the same interests as you.
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
22 Jun 07
I've weeded out quite a few of my friend request just recently. I still have 6 pending, that i need to check out, but I have a feeling I won't keep many of them either. Many of them have been on the list for more than 2 or 3 months.. I just haven't gotten around to it.. because like you, I want to make sure we have things in common, and that they have at least responded to one of my discussions and I vice versa.. there are plenty of people that I respond to their discussions alot, and they mine.. (when I make one) so I'd rather be friends with them...then get updates and alerts for people that I may have nothing in common with or that I don't enjoy their posts. I don't think anything is wrong with that.
1 person likes this
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
22 Jun 07
Thanks for your perspective on this. I don't get alerts for every one of my friends dicussions, just a certain few. I did keep everyone as my friend and I will see if we can help each other out.
@daycarepal (1998)
• United States
22 Jun 07
I haven't denied anyone that has requested to be my friend. I approve them all. I figure maybe they will respond to a few of my discussions. I do check out their discussions and if I see something interesting, then I will respond. If they don't have anything that interests me, then I might just wait a couple days and check back again.
1 person likes this
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
22 Jun 07
That is what I have decided to do. I just went threw and approved all 50 some friend requests. I figure that it is nice that they asked to be my friend and we might be able to help with each others discussions.
@collstarx (1177)
• Indonesia
22 Jun 07
I am accept every friends to add me, i think in mylot we must have many friend so we can together make mylot best internet community in internet. best regards
1 person likes this
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
22 Jun 07
Good thinking. I also accept everyone.
@KissThis (3003)
• United States
21 Jun 07
I actually haven't denied anyone from my friends list. I figure if they are requesting to be my friend then they must have a reason why. If I find out after approving them that they just wanted to spam me then I will delete them off of my friends list. I will respond to their discussions if I can and if I can't well then they have the option of deleting me off of their friends list as well.
1 person likes this
@sunshine4 (8703)
• United States
22 Jun 07
So true. This is why I have left some pending. I think that it is nice they want to be my friend and there must be a reason why they picked me.
1 person likes this
@my2boys (821)
• United States
2 Feb 09
I dont deny friend requests but every once in a while I go throgh and clean out my friends list.
1 person likes this
• India
2 Feb 09
no dear friend, i never do this. I accept all friend requests. I approve all friend requests, If i got time i also send messages also.