40 Year Old Coach, Marries Sixteen Year Old Student!!!

@Rozie37 (15499)
Turkmenistan
June 22, 2007 4:13pm CST
This is heartbreaking for me and much worse for the parents, who felt that their best course of action was to give their consent to the marrige. I remember being sixteen years old and in love and dating a 26 year old man. In fact, I was with him for my sweet sixteen birthday. I remember thinking that I was grown up enough to know what I was doing. Now, that I am 37, I realize that I did not have a clue.
9 people like this
24 responses
• United States
22 Jun 07
This is really hearbreaking. The man was her coach and took advantage of the situation. Why is there no punishment for this pervert when women have done this they go to jail and loose there children. Look at the teachers that has happened to. He was in the same type of situation. Either way an adult taking advantage of this type of situation is sick and needs to be put away.
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
22 Jun 07
This is very true. This coach obviously has boundary issues, to say the least. I hope that this never happens again.
2 people like this
23 Jun 07
only god can judge but end the end this shall prevail and i dont understand how this human being could be filled with such desperation to do someting so evil and selfish this is just discusting filthy an unecessary but like i said in thee end this shall prevail
@disvachic (10121)
• United States
22 Jun 07
That is ridiculous he is a grown man and she is nothing but a child.In my book he is a pervert he is to old.40 years old just takes the cake.Parents needs to be more aware of what goes on their child's life.I think the law should be more stricter about a situation like this.I mean with the parents consent or not.My daughter better not be talking to a grown 40 year old man
3 people like this
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
22 Jun 07
Apparently the daughter became withdrawn and refused to speak to her parents until they signed the consent. I didn't have parents, so there was no one to really convince me to leave my boyfriend. I have never heard of this kind of thing happening in a home where both parents were there and cared for their daughter, but apparently he gave her something that she was missing at home.
3 people like this
• United States
22 Jun 07
Isn't there a law against that? That's really sick. The 40 year old should have known better than to even consider dating a student. Especially one that is only 16. I would not have given my consent to the marriage if I was that girl's parent. Without the parent's consent that marriage would not have happened. I'm sorry, but that man should be put in jail. Just my opinion.
3 people like this
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
22 Jun 07
I agree that he should be in jail. I believe that the parents consented just to maintain a relationship with their child. They treid all that they could legally, before giving in.
2 people like this
@biwasaki (1745)
• United States
22 Jun 07
How could her parents allow her to marry a 40 year old in good conscience? I believe that the age difference and maturity levels between the two are obstacles that they'll never be able to overcome. Add to this the fact that in most states, it would be considered statutory rape if they weren't married. I think this "marriage" is a disaster waiting to happen, and my heart goes out to this girl who thinks that marrying a 40 year old will solve her problems.
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
22 Jun 07
They fought it as much as they could, but in the end, I guess they felt the best thing to do was to give in. This girl was serious about what she wanted. I would think that he would still be considered a child molester, but I guess not.
2 people like this
• Canada
23 Jun 07
First of all that is disgusting. Although some couples have age differences of more than 10 years, this s just wrong! A 40-year old should not be able to marry a naive 16 year old girl. Perhaps if she was 26 and he was 50, the situation might be different as she might have more life experience to relaize the situation she is in, but 16 to a 40 year old is just wrong!!!
3 people like this
@Shaun72 (15968)
• Palatka, Florida
22 Jun 07
That is a big age difference between 40 and 16 I ,ean a huge difference. Of course when I was 18 I dated a man that was in his 30's nothing to serious though.
• Canada
23 Jun 07
I don't know the whole story behind this but would never for any reason give permission for my child of sixteen to marry a forty year old . I would be looking at pressing charges against someone who was this much older then my child and would be wondering what kind of parent I was and where I went wrong about why my child had got in a situation where she felt she was in love with someone this old ( not that I blame the parents as we can't watch everything our children do and have to be able to trust them at some point in their lives ) . I really would have doubts about someone of this age being with my child and what the real reason for him wanting to be with my child was . You do have to feel bad for this situation because somewhere something went wrong in a big way .
2 people like this
• United States
25 Jun 07
I'd at least bring charges against the teacher and the school board. He should not be working with under aged students.
1 person likes this
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
25 Jun 07
That's just it, he resigned after they got married, but the school should still be partly responsible for hiring him.
@lisado (1230)
• United States
23 Jun 07
What??? No way woiuld I give in and let my 16 year old marry a 40 year old. He should have charges filed against him. That is just sick. Her parents should have fought harder and not given in because she was pouting. You watch. In a few years she is going to blame her parents for her marriage when it falls apart. It'll be their fault for not stopping her. She'll end up on some talk show crying about how if her parents really loved her they would have stopped her. What is wrong with kids these days??
2 people like this
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
23 Jun 07
I think the parents just wanted to continue having a relationship with their daughter. They did not want to lose her completely. To me, that is true love.
1 person likes this
@dopey22girl (3324)
• United States
23 Jun 07
That is disgusting. I don't think at that age she knows what she wants...16 is just wayy to young to decide that you want to spend the rest of your life with someone. I can't believe her parents agreed to that! That's even sadder!
2 people like this
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
23 Jun 07
I honestly believe that they did the best that they could to stop her. I completely agree that 16 is much to young to make such a serious choice. Maybe she will come to her senses and go back home soon.
1 person likes this
@moomincat (321)
23 Jun 07
In my opinion he has stolen her youth. Very Sad!!!!
2 people like this
@4cuteboys (4102)
• United States
23 Jun 07
Yeah I read about it. I looked and saw pics too, the girl is so cute and sweet looking. :( I married a 28 year old when I was 17 and my parents gave permission. I had two kids with him. Then came the inevitable divorce. I thought I was grown up and could do whatever. My parents only gave permission because I told them if they didnt I wouldn't be speaking to them anymore. I still feel terrible about it. I hope it actually works out for her and she doesnt live to regret her actions.
2 people like this
@Marie2473 (8519)
• Sweden
23 Jun 07
Here it is illegal to marry unless you are 18 so this would not be a problem here. I guess the parents feel as if they cant do much more, and I am also sure thatthis 40 year old is not well. What cpuld a 40year old have incommon with a 16 year old that hasnt even graduated from highschool?
2 people like this
• India
23 Jun 07
wow that really is heart breaking!taht 40 yr old man seriously took advantage of her being her coach....well but what can the poor parents do? isnt it? well i guess hse will realise her own faults sooner or later and she is going to grow older and mature so lets wait and hope for the best in either way
2 people like this
@maddysmommy (16233)
• United States
22 Jun 07
Oh teenagers these days I don't know. I can't believe the parents gave consent for their marriage. That man is way too old for her and she's not even out of high school yet!! this is sad news.
1 person likes this
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
23 Jun 07
This is very sad, but the parents did everything that they could. If they had not consented they would have lost their relationship with her. They tried everything that they could.
@mrsbrian (1951)
• United States
23 Jun 07
There is no way in the world I believe the parents did all they could,What parent in there right mind would allow this.The daughter should not have been alone with this man long enough to even form a relationship with this man,I mean who would allow there daughter to be seeing this man other than the time spent for coaching. The parents of this child should have had this man put in jail so what the daughter wasnt speaking to them,in time she would have gotten over it.
1 person likes this
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
24 Jun 07
I agree that if it had been my child, I would never have caved in. I believe that sometimes you have to do what is best for the child and trust that they will understand when they get older. This old man is in lust anyway. Love has nothing to do with it or he could have waited.
@tina12679 (1126)
• United States
24 Jun 07
I can see why her parents just gave their concent i mean at that age she was bound to do whatever it is to get the way she wants even witout her parent aproval she may of not been able to get married to him but she may have ran away or cut her parents out of their lives. Who knows what she would of done. But a man that old should know better, i wonder if the thought ever crossed his mind, what if he had a daughter of 16 and wanted to marry a 40 year old man.
1 person likes this
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
24 Jun 07
Apparently, this guy does not have enough brains to think of how he would feel if he had a sixteen year old daughter and some forty year old took her away from him. This is a very sad situation indeed.
@xenpen (90)
• United States
24 Jun 07
First of all, the guy better not be ugly (hahahaha). Secondly, if the age of consent in your state is 17, then wtf? The guy only had to wait ONE MORE YEAR until he could do as he pleased and she as well. I have a cousin who got married at 15 to an older man. Fortunately she wised up and divorced his crazy behind. He even stalked her some time after that. Things like that make me wonder about men who do chase after girls much younger than themselves. It's gotta feel like dating your own daughter to some extent. Eww... Now I do believe that love can happen between people with such an age gap, but they do know the law, and the law is absolute in the usual cases of older men seeking young girls. Coach knows what's up, and the girl knows what's up. Them not listening to anyone will have consequences, but I'm glad the parents didn't force their will on her. I'm sure they haven't given up completely, but as long as she feels she can still trust and confide in her parents, things should turn out ok.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
23 Jun 07
love is ageless, love is limitless, it don't mind anything... but now you seemed like you were regretting for marrying you man... I conclude that your love must be conditional... it's sad for me to hear that... SORRY
1 person likes this
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
23 Jun 07
Thank God in heaven, I never did mary that man. Yes, when a man hits you and verbally abuses you and so mena other things, love can become quite conditional, for survival.
• Philippines
24 Jun 07
oh... sorry I miss understand it... but love for me has never been a conditional.. I'm going to do everything for my love.
@yanjiaren (9050)
2 Jul 07
However much we don't mind love and age differences this case is different..The sixteen year old is still very young and not really a fully fledged adult.I see my nieces here they are 20 and 18 and still very dependent on the rest of the family..yes they go out have friends the odd boyfriend but I can't class them stil as ADULTS..This older person has clearly taken advantage of this younger person and this is definitely not on.
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
2 Jul 07
See, I am thinking like you. I have seven nieces, the oldest is 19 and the youngest is 12. The nineteen year old has a one year old child, but she is still very much a child her self. She is living at home and is not ready to take care of the needs of a baby, much less a man. This child who married the coach has never had the opportunity to experience the freedom of adulthood. She is going to hear of all her other friends going to the prom and doing fun stuff and she is going to be home cooking, cleaning, and probably tending to the baby of this old man. It is really sad.
2 Jul 07
I wonder what got into the parents brain.i would never allow my 16 year old daughter to get married to any man .
1 person likes this
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
2 Jul 07
I believe that they felt as though they were backed into a corner and they did not want to lose their relationship with their daughter.
• United States
3 Jul 07
I know that students date their teacher on the sly. I worked with a man and he introduced me to his wife..and after a few drinks they told me he was her teacher in high school and she was underaged..a minor..and they lived together and finally got married..but he lost his job..it happens..
1 person likes this
@Savvynlady (3686)
• United States
3 Jul 07
This reminds me of a book I read a while back called "Fly On The Wall" where this 32 year old teacher hooked up with a 18 year old; I had some real mixed feelings on it; I have a 17 year old, and to be honest, she isn't old enough to be with no older man, and I just cannot fathom the situation. I think about that teacher who got with her student and I feel a boundary was crossed. Can Love happen? I would say yes.but in an inappropriate situation? hard, tough question.
1 person likes this