Does you husband put too many unrealistic demands on you since you...

United States
June 27, 2007 8:45pm CST
Does your husband put too many unrealistic demands on you since you became a mom? Since our baby was born, seems like my spouse simply can't take care of himself. He expects me to stop whatever I'm working on just to make a sandwich for him. It's not rocket science, hon, just slap a couple pieces of bologna on bread and you're done! It's not as if I don't have something better to do. Anyway, I know that my man is not the only one that imposes silly demands. So what about yours? Does your spouse or partner impose silly demands on you since you had a baby? Was he that way before? Does he expect you to make time for him even when he won't make time for you? Does he ask you to wait on him, when he is more than capable of serving himself? Does he expect you to look like Brie from the Desperate Housewives even when you're busy cleaning or taking care of the kids? What silly or ridiculous thing does your partner or spouse expect you to do, that you would prefer not to?
3 people like this
11 responses
@butterfly39 (3907)
• Philippines
28 Jun 07
Yes that's true. There are things that they can't do even it's really too simple for them to do it. Sometimes I ask my husband what's his purpose of marrying me if he only wants a maid. I have to wake up ealy to cook for him and a baby to take care, a lot household chores to do then when he arrives, cook again for dinner. I don't know really...I am not a Superwoman.
1 person likes this
@makingpots (11922)
• United States
30 Jun 07
Sometimes I think my husband is the exception to all husband rules. No, he has become so helpful and wonderful since our son has been born. I have nothing to really complain about except that maybe he is a little too focussed on making everything right for us and our family that he doesn't remember the little things ..... like the fact that a nice shoulder or foot rub can go a long way at the end of the day.
• Philippines
29 Jun 07
Some guys can really be inconsiderate, they're like trying to compete with their kids for the mom's attention, luckily for me my husband was well trained by his mom, when i gave birth i was able to focus on my son, my husband did all the household chores from doing the dishes, laundry, running errands, he was very helpful. He even cooked for us.
@psyche49f (2512)
• Philippines
28 Jun 07
That's really upsetting...no, my husband is not that demanding. In fact when our kids were small, he helps out with things like changing diapers, washing soiled linens, preparing the formula....I'm just fortunate because he does things around the house so that I can take care of our baby. I have heard the same complaints from my colleagues and it was then that I realized that my husband, a hands-on husband is so nice as not to expect to be served but to serve instead. Have a heart-to-heart talk with your husband, tell him honestly how you feel, give suggestions to improve domestic concerns. I am confident that he would listen, and that he would realize that in a relationship, it's more of a give and take...besides, male chauvinism is no longer popular these days so that husbands should not really expect to be served all the time...
@TerryZ (22085)
• United States
28 Jun 07
Oh yes I think most men are like this. I havent met one yet who doesnt like to be spoiled. They need attention or they get jeolous.LOL They are just like little boys. My husband knows how far he can go before I let him have it.LOL
@sidoney (1033)
• Jamaica
28 Jun 07
Its like since I am not working I have all the time in the world to idle and do nothing but a child is a hand full in its self I must say honestly I use to wonder about this but I did not know it was so hard and its like I have 2 babies and I am always broke when I ask him for money he wants to know what for ect
@tim_un (355)
• Malaysia
28 Jun 07
i am a husband and normally i didnt put my wife in unrealistic demands.I promise my wife i will give her a happy life after married, so i will keep my word. Some more nobody like unrealistic demand, same as myself too.I believe those hunsband that really love their wife wont do that !
@Gemmygirl1 (2871)
• Australia
28 Jun 07
My other half has gotten a little lazier since we had our daughter, he drinks (which is fine coz it's not heaps) but it's too much of an effort to put the cans in the bin or back in the empty carton - they just pile up, higher & higher on my kitchen benches! He expects dinner, which is fine but he can never make up his mind what he wants & when he does decide he complains that it's taking too long to cook - if he's decided sooner it could have been made sooner! He also thinks it's ok to leave his dirty clothing all over the bedroom & bathroom floors & expect me to touch his dirty, stinky socks to wash them - i didn't buy a laundry hamper for him not to use it!
@tinamwhite (3255)
• United States
28 Jun 07
No, my husband never asks much of me...I know when he is really feeling badly and when that happens I pick up the slack and do the heavier chores too...without telling him until I had completed them... He is a disabled Veteran and there are days when he simply does not feel well enough to even get out of his recliner...on days when he does feel 1/2 descent...he is capable and more than willing to make his own sandwich, start laundry or whatever else he feels needs to be dome...He does not make demands of any time on me...he never has been that way... I do realize that I am fortunate because he is definitely one of a kind...LOL
@cynddvs (2950)
• United States
28 Jun 07
The only thing my fiance really expects from me is to keep the house reasonably clean and to cook and take care of our daughter. Those demands are reasonable and I can handle that. But there are times when I get busy taking care of our daughter or busy cleaning and he will get hungry. Instead of going to the kitchen and fixing him a sandwich he will just sit around and get all grouchy because he is hungry. There are times I'll get sick of hearing him gripe and shove some food in front of him just to calm him down. But I don't think he expects me to look like Brie from Desperate Housewives and if he does that just doesn't happen. Every now and then like today I'll make myself look nice by throwing on some nice or nicer clothes and some makeup. But for the most part when I'm home all day taking care of my daughter and cleaning I'm in my old shorts and t-shirts with no makeup.
@Michele21 (3095)
• United States
28 Jun 07
I think most men are that way!! I can TOTALLY realate to this discussion!! My husband will be sitting down trying to fix something and every little things that he needs he will ask me to get for him!! I get so frusterated because I am like I might as well fix it myself if I am going to have to go back and forth to get everything you need. He doesn't mind that I don't dress up around the house, he likes it when I do though, I try to look good for him, but he will tell me my jeans are baggy and he can't see my butt or something like that =) I make him dinner sometimes, or lunch whatever, but I don't like fixing someone else's plate, I just feel weird because I don't know how much food he wants so I will tell him when it is ready...and then a few minutes later he will walk into the kitchen and be like, "Where is my plate??" expecting me to do everything for him!! Like it isn't hard enough doing every little thing for our two kids, I have to add him to the list as well?? What about myself...so I am taaking care of four peole and he wonders why I get b*tchy?? I think most wives could go on for hours about the silly things our husbands do!!