Update on my friend who had a boyfriend who hits her.

friends forever - we'll be friends for life...
@mycharm88 (2292)
Philippines
June 30, 2007 7:03pm CST
I would like to thank you all for sharing your thoughts on what to do about my friend. I always tried to convince her to live that guy for as we all know that she is better off without him... It took me weeks to decide and a week ago i tried to tell her parents about the problem and you're right, she said she hates me now. I don't really care if she really mean what she said, she said she'd never want to see me again. I'm still praying for her, it's really up to her parents now on what to do with their daughter or to that guy. I'm sad though, having the thought that she wants me out of her life now. But i'm still hoping things will be alright for her in time. and i do hope that someday she find it in her heart that i did it for her own good. Pls. help me pray for her...
9 people like this
15 responses
@rangics (1335)
• Philippines
1 Jul 07
She may HATE you so much now but I'm sure time will come she will THANK YOU for that thing you've done for her. She'll not understand your intention nowadays but I know evrything will be alright between you two soon. You're a friend who is just concerned for her so continue to be that way. Your friend is just so lucky enough to have you. and hey, I am too. Take care pal! ;) I hope and pray it will be alright soon.. Godbless! ;)
@mycharm88 (2292)
• Philippines
1 Jul 07
Thank you so much Rangics... i do hope so that she'll realize things. I really am concerned about this friend of mine but she just can't see it. Oh well, i'm still here for her, i do remind her by texting her that i'm still a friend and waiting for her to call if she needs anything.
2 people like this
@mycharm88 (2292)
• Philippines
1 Jul 07
You take care too and God bless my sweet friend, i know i'm lucky to have you too.
2 people like this
@charms88 (7546)
• Philippines
1 Jul 07
Hello little sis. I checked through your profile and read the discussion. I'm just so sorry that your friend decided to forsake your friendship and chose to be someone's dummy instead. Love can be many things. It can turned your life upside down and before you know it, you're hooked deeply. Your friend was TOO BLINDED to see the real situation. She forget her self-esteem, letting herself lose her perspective and eventually stop loving herself. There should always be a limit in loving a person. Either your friend loves the pain of being constantly hit by her boyfriend or she was too afraid to walk away from the relationship. You already did your part. There's is nothing more we can do but be a shadow and continue to take a close look at her. We can only cross our fingers and wish that your friend will wake up one day from her nightmares.
@mycharm88 (2292)
• Philippines
1 Jul 07
Yeah sis, i pity her... And i just don't understand why she chose him over me, He who hits her, i know she is blinded..I just did what i had to do right? For her own sake, and now i should have to accept the fact that our friendship is over... I thank you sis for taking the time to share your thoughts about this. I still don't feel alright about what happened but at least i have people like you who understands.
2 people like this
@gabesmom (1246)
• United States
1 Jul 07
You did the right thing. If your friend's boyfriend has violent tendencies then he may hurt her badly, or worse, kill her. She may be mad at you right now, but just continue to be her friend. I hope she realizes that you were just concerned with her well-being. I will definitely pray that you patch things up very soon.
3 people like this
@mycharm88 (2292)
• Philippines
1 Jul 07
i am really sad now knowing that she hates me but relieved at the same time because i know her parents would know what to do in her situation. Her parents were glad that i did tell them what's been going on for months now and i did get to apologize that i haven't told them earlier. Thank you so much Gabesmom, your prayers are highly appreaciated. take care.
2 people like this
@pelo26 (1553)
• Philippines
1 Jul 07
You just did what a good friend would do. If she believes otherwise, all you have to do now is support her and find a way how to fix this domestic problem they got. Don't leave her. You might be the last person who'd understand her. Hope everything turns out alright.
@mycharm88 (2292)
• Philippines
1 Jul 07
thanks Pelo... I know i did the right thing for her, though she never wants to see me again, i still text her and let her know that i'm still here for her. I do hope things will be well soon. take care friend.
2 people like this
@webeishere (36377)
• United States
1 Jul 07
Well in my opinion this was never a real "friend" then. I have had friends do things that really hurt and or upset me. But as it's a friend things passed. I could never "hate" a friend in my liftime. Friends that are true friends never hate. Dislike what was done yes, or even hate what one did. But never hate a friend or that was never a friendship. HAPPY POSTINGS FROM GRANDPA BOB !!~
@mycharm88 (2292)
• Philippines
1 Jul 07
I guess you're right about that grandpabob. I don't feel really good these days for i know that she hates me, i mean.. that's what she said, i just wish she didn't mean it by saying that. I'm still hoping and praying that we'll patch things up soon. Thanks grandpabob.. you always have a way to make smile...
2 people like this
@webeishere (36377)
• United States
1 Jul 07
The words you are using are all wrong. Take this to heart and not as being mean. What do you mean by..." we'll"? You did nothing wrong. She is the one in the wrong. get to realize this before you start getting on the pity pot now. She is the one that is wrong in what she said and did to a so called "friend". You did what a caring and concerned friend would do for a real "friend". So stop saying that you have to help make things better. She is the one that needs to make any and all amends not you. Sorry if this sounded harsh but I hate when people are not in the wrong yet they get on a pity pot saying the have make it better. NO YOU DO NOT!!!! It's that simple. Ahhhh. That's off my chest now. Let her make the moves and apologies and let her make amends towards you. If she does she is a friend. If she doesn't then you lost a person who didn't really care as much as a friend would. HAPPY POSTINGS FROM GRANDPA BOB !!~
2 people like this
@charms88 (7546)
• Philippines
1 Jul 07
Grandpa is right, little sis. A friend who turned their back on us is not a good friend at all. You have absolutely nothing to feel bad about. It is better to focus ourself more on friends who accept us from head to toe, inside and out. Listen to what grandpa said.
3 people like this
@gabs8513 (48803)
• United Kingdom
1 Jul 07
Sweetie I am sure that she will eventually realize that it was for her own good Keep her in your thoughts and I am sure once she realizes that you where looking after her she will be ok Love and Hugs to you
2 people like this
@mycharm88 (2292)
• Philippines
3 Jul 07
Hello sweet gabs... thanks for the hugs : ) As of the moment i'm just praying for her to be ok, but still hoping that she'll be ok soon. Hugz to you too dear friend.
2 people like this
@gabs8513 (48803)
• United Kingdom
3 Jul 07
That is all you can do at the moment Sweetie keep her in your thoughts Hugs to you
1 person likes this
@mari_skye (1638)
• Philippines
3 Jul 07
She will soon realize that what you did was right. Maybe now she is a little upset about you telling on her to her parents but you did the right thing. You may not know it but you may have saved her life. And good for you. Continue your prayers for your friend and your friendship. God bless!
2 people like this
@mycharm88 (2292)
• Philippines
3 Jul 07
Thanks Mari_skye... Pls. help me pray for her also... Thanks in advance.
@butterfly39 (3907)
• Philippines
3 Jul 07
You just did the right thing girl, and don't worry I know that she'll be longing for you if now then maybe soon...I know she's still in pain and can't accept things.
2 people like this
@mycharm88 (2292)
• Philippines
3 Jul 07
I know it's not easy for her because she loved him, but i am not sorry for what i did, tsk... i just did what i have to do for my friend, glad on we're on the same boat here Butterfly..Thanks for pitching in friend.
• United States
2 Jul 07
I am glad her parents know about the boyfriend.I'm sorry that I was right about her hating you for trying to help.It is hard to do the right thing sometimes.I hope you have other real friends that can help ease the pain.I know it is hard but you did the right thing, and I am proud of you. Many people would have looked the other way because they would be afraid to get involved.Take Care.
2 people like this
@mycharm88 (2292)
• Philippines
3 Jul 07
Yeah it's really hard for me and scary too, but still glad that i did it.I'm happy to have some real friends who are making me feel better, like all of you here who have such nice words, i really do appreciate it guys. You take care Sarah, glad your my friend.
1 person likes this
• Hong Kong
2 Jul 07
Oh good! You have done a great job! I am sure she is just in a confused stage now and things will get better when she comes to her senses that that guy doesn't deserve her at all and it's not someone worthy to love! She will thank you later for saving her life. I am sure it's hard on you to gather up the courage and tell her parents, and I am really proud of you. Now it's her parent's job to deal with their daughter and explain the "senses" to her. I wish her good luck and I wish you would have a normal friend back again in your life.
@mycharm88 (2292)
• Philippines
3 Jul 07
Hello icequeen... I knew it was the right thing to do, took me long before i decided to tell her parents because i was scared 'Til i got over it and i was more worried about her. So that's it for us, but i'm still hoping for things to be better sooner.Thank you friend for your nice words, made me feel a lot better.
@Marie2473 (8523)
• Sweden
1 Jul 07
you did the right thing and she will see that later on when she no longer is under his influence. I was abused by my ex, but I was blind to all his faults and just thought that all people wanted to ruin things for me, now I see they just wanted to help me get away from a man that was ruining my life. She will come around sooner or later and even if she doesn´t, please know that u did the right thing for her.
2 people like this
@mycharm88 (2292)
• Philippines
3 Jul 07
I'm happy for you Marie, i know now that you're free and never have to fear someone who is ruining your life. I hope my friend will be ok soon. Thank you so much friend for sharing your thoughts on this. Take care.
1 person likes this
• United States
1 Jul 07
Well, what's done is done. You can't change that. I would give her some time to cool off. I'm sure the last people she wanted knowing about it is her parents. She may come around one day and realize that you were just trying to be a good friend. Could you write her a letter? She's in my thoughts and prayers.
@mycharm88 (2292)
• Philippines
3 Jul 07
I think that's what i'm doing now, waiting for her to cool off... I feel better now knowing that her parents know the problem. I think i'll leave it to them for now, there's nothing much i can do but to pray. I cannot write her now, for she might just tear it to peices...Thank you my friend...
1 person likes this
• Philippines
1 Jul 07
you had been a good friend indeed. Only, your friend is immature and hard headed. She cannot not accept the fact that she is being corrected. Someday she will realized the importance of what you did to her. You will still succeed in saving her. not today but tomorrow.
2 people like this
@mycharm88 (2292)
• Philippines
3 Jul 07
Yeah i did it for her, and i feel better now. I know she is safer now that her parents know about it and maybe someday i really hope she'll realize things. Thanks for responding friend.
1 person likes this
@psyche49f (2512)
• Philippines
1 Jul 07
Your friend probably wanted to play martyr to that man...it's good that you were able to tell the parents before it's too late..never mind if she hates you for it..the more important thing is that she will be guided by her parents, and perhaps keep the boy away from her. Sometimes love can be so 'blind' and so stupid as to love even when one is abused or hurt. For me, that is really stupid...If I were the one being abused, I would even call the police and have this man arrested. No wonder there are lots of women who suffer in silence because they keep quiet about the abuse and suffer in silence...that's truly revolting. Later, your friend will realize that you are just doing her a favor....
@mycharm88 (2292)
• Philippines
3 Jul 07
I really hope that she does. I'm still praying for her though.Thanks Psyche...
1 person likes this
@Zelmarq (11509)
• Cebu City, Philippines
3 Jul 07
Thats a good move that ou made by telling her parenst about the issue and they really have the right to know. No one has the right to hurt their child the way this guy is hurting her. I just wonder why she lets him hurt her like this. May be as the song goes " love moves in mystreious ways, always so surprising and love appears overthe horizon", its really mysterious, eve if she was hurting and bieng abused she still endures the pain and continued loving the man who hurt her. Well, I am only intitled with my opinion to speak about the idea and I just want to speak it outloud. I know that you care so much for her and have sacrificed her feelings to protect her from the abusive boyfriend. She might not appreciate your gesture but I know it time she will be very thankful for what you did. ust continue praying, prayer moves mountians and its the only thing that we can hold on to when times get rough and its the only foundation too srong in every trial.
1 person likes this