Have You Ever Ended A Friendship With No Explanation?

@Rozie37 (15503)
Turkmenistan
July 7, 2007 3:23am CST
Have you ever cut a friend out of your life without discussing it with them or giving them a reason why. You just got so fed up that you didn't want anything more to do with this person. I have someone like that in my life. She considers me a friend and although I have been like a friend to her, she has not been a good friend to me and I have told her several times that although I care about her, I do not like her ways and she is not someone that I would call a friend. Now, I am fed up with her. I have helped her through a lot and it has taken a toll on me and I just don't want to be bothered any more.
7 people like this
23 responses
@maddysmommy (16236)
• United States
7 Jul 07
That must be hard to deal with and I can understand where you're coming from. You know if she is being more of a hindurance than anything, then maybe it is time to let go and don't bother with her anymore. I haven't ended any friendship but one person has with me. It wasn't even my fault and I got blamed for it when I was with my ex. He did some things that I was not aware of until I left him and she came to me to deal with it. I had told her I had nothing to do with it and didn't even know about it but she insisted I pay for it. I referred her to my Ex and he did nothing about it and because she was a distant relative I felt obligated to at least help somewhat. I tried to but at that stage I couldn't afford to help out anymore and she cut me off altogether. I do miss our friendship though as we were close once. Oh well such is life I suppose.
@Rozie37 (15503)
• Turkmenistan
7 Jul 07
It is really tough. My heart is breaking over this. I want to be a good friend, but is it wrong to ask for the same in return? I know that I am not perfect, but I do try my best. Things like this are very difficult for me.
2 people like this
@maddysmommy (16236)
• United States
7 Jul 07
No, I don't think your asking for much at all Rozie, and I don't know how I would deal with this. If a friend was making me feel this way, and I had done all that I could to make our friendship work, and it still wasn't what I wanted, then I would probably start to distance myself from her/him. It is a tough call though! I hope it works out for you in the end my friend.!
1 person likes this
• Bahrain
7 Jul 07
i totally agree :)
1 person likes this
@sigma77 (5385)
• United States
7 Jul 07
I have had that happen to me a few times. I don't know what I did to cause them to give up our friendship. The same with being married. No one has told my why they left or gave up on things. I would not take advantage of a friendship and can understand how you fell about this person. If you have told her the reasons that you did not want to be close friends with her, then that is about all you can do.
2 people like this
@Rozie37 (15503)
• Turkmenistan
7 Jul 07
I always want to try my best to do the right thing. That is why I posted this, to get others opinions. I care very deeply for her and she has come a long way. Maybe, I just need a little break from the situation. I do believe that when you care about someone that you should do whatever it takes to help them. I prayed about it this morning and I want God to lead me in the right direction. Thank you so much for responding, you have really helped me a lot.
2 people like this
• United States
7 Jul 07
I agree with you..if someone isnt acting like a friend, then I'll just drop them too without notice. You shouldnt have to remind someone to act like your friend, they should just do it..
• Bahrain
7 Jul 07
No i think this is wrong idea.. dropping down a friend without a notice is so wrong!! i think that you have to inform him.
1 person likes this
• India
7 Jul 07
HI ROZIE.i read your message.ur words seems me true.but i have something to tell u.we all are human beings and bymistake anything may go wrong by us often.on my view there may be any missunderstanding between you and ur friend.both of u should disuss about it freely and frankly.you should finish your friendship in such way.world is based on HOPE.we should not lose hope.my dear friend u please try atleast once more to rebuild ur friendship because finding a true in today's society is very difficult.wish u best for it.bye.
1 person likes this
@Rozie37 (15503)
• Turkmenistan
7 Jul 07
Thank you so much for your words. They have truly helped me in my decission. I know that true friends are hard to come by and that building a strong relationship is hard work. I just want to make sure that I am doing the right thing.
1 person likes this
• United States
7 Jul 07
I had a so called friend that I thought was helping me out. She paid me to babysit her kids when I was unemployed. I thought she was working, but she was cheating on her husband and using me as a cover. I felt very betrayed and just dropped her when I found out. It was confusing for our kids, but I just couldn't believe she would risk her marriage for some loser she picked up in a bar. And she never even told me about it!! (LOL)
@Rozie37 (15503)
• Turkmenistan
7 Jul 07
See that has a lot to do with my situation also. This "friend" treats her other friends worse than she treats me. So for a long time, I excused it by saying, that is just the way that she is. Now, I don't feel that way any more. If she wants to treat other people bad and they are willing to deal with it, that is fine, but if she can't treat me any better, then I don't want her in my life. We deserve to feel good about the friends that we choose.
1 person likes this
• United States
9 Jul 07
Yea, but if they treat you like crap..why would you even want any more to do with them?
1 person likes this
@chenee08 (591)
• Philippines
8 Jul 07
yeah, and for me it was so painful coz i consider her as my bestfriend and the sad thing is i dont know what went wrong. we don't even have any arguiment or anyhing. i just woke up one day we dont talk to each other ever we're in the same school and it's really hard for me coz i see her everyday.
1 person likes this
@Flight84 (3050)
• United States
8 Jul 07
Sometimes people like that don't deserve an explantion. I have had to do that too. I didn't need that person in my life bringing negativity and drama. I'm much better off and I'm sure you are too.
1 person likes this
8 Jul 07
I think that ending friendship without any explnation may not be a good friendship. a real friendship shall be clear,vallid and without any hinderance. any problem or issue shall be discussed clearly without hesitation either good or bad. Mere discussion does not harm either of you. Be frank and discuss the problem and then give your opinion and then declare discarding the friendship.I do so and the misunderstandings if any will be cleared off and both can discard friendship as good friends.
1 person likes this
@orbeltadz (506)
• Baguio, Philippines
8 Jul 07
Yes. Before we end up, I wrote him a letter saying all the things I regret for knowing him. His my best friend yet worst enemy. I'm expecting his reply but it never comes.
1 person likes this
@wonderful1 (2076)
• China
8 Jul 07
Yes, I have ever ended a friendship with an old friend, we met each other when we were 8 years, and we know each other over 12 when I cut her out of my life. Frankly, she is not my real friend. When I was a little child, my family was very poor, and most of my classmates looked down upon me, she was too. But she still made friend with me, because she thought she would catch more attention than me. At last, I don't contact with her without saying a word.
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Jul 07
The best thing in this situation would be to just walk away. If she has no consideration for you as a friend then she is really not someone to deal with. Move on, it's fine not to give explination, I've had this experience many times. Why have a so called friend. Just walk away.
1 person likes this
@meljessxena (2319)
• Australia
8 Jul 07
i sort of cut a friend off without explaning it, i tried to explain why i didnt want to be friend but in a male mind he didnt want to seem to understand, and well he starting talking to me not so nice so i just ignored him now deleting his emails and on msn and his number out of my phone
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Jul 07
Good for you. Yes i do that alot to some of the internet buddys that i get. Although i do tend to loose touch with friends that may have moved away and never really tried to stay in touch with them. Aww i know this all so well. I am sure that friend is now aware what a great friend you are and is probably trying to change, but things never really change. whats a month or a week of change only to find they go right back to the old self! Its a shame when you give friends a inch and they take a mile.
1 person likes this
@ofn2007 (121)
• Greece
8 Jul 07
Hi Rozie3, Yes i did it before,I believe this is matter of trust. when you feel this person is not trusted,then you should stop.
1 person likes this
@worldwise1 (14888)
• United States
8 Jul 07
That was probably a smart decision on your part, Rozie. I sometimes think that certain people were put on earth simply to drain whatever they can from society in general. They are takers and users and don't care about responding in kind. I have had a coupke of such people in my life and I considered myself well rid of them once I caught on to their game. I had no compunction about walking away from them, and my life is much better without them in it.
@youless (90025)
• Guangzhou, China
8 Jul 07
I think so. When the friendship is gone, there is no need to say anything about it. For example, today I almost don't contact my friends from primary school. As my friends from primary school have changed a lot and it's hard to have a friendship like before. So as time goes by, we almost lose contact to each other.
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
7 Jul 07
i ever do that.. because sometime we make friend but we don't know how bad or good they are.. and for my case my friend before we become closer he much better in person but then he changing his habit become worse.. he started to do something that i don't like.. so i just 'go away' even i not consider he as friend but he still don't know about that.. i'm just lost my faith to believe...
1 person likes this
@Shaun72 (15968)
• Palatka, Florida
7 Jul 07
I have a few times I guess I got tired of the person being bossy and always wanting things their way. So I just stopped going aroung them. Or friend's that have used me I have also leared to avoid them evantully.
1 person likes this
• India
7 Jul 07
Yes .. once .. me & one of my new friends stopped talking to each other ..cause we had our own misunderstandings. So one fine day i avoided her...she noticed & from the following day she did the same. We haven't spoken since. It has been 3 years now. Though i now realize it was silly.
1 person likes this