For those of you from New Jersey or even New York here are some driving tips..

@shambuca (2560)
United States
July 10, 2007 7:53am CST
my friend emailed this to me..so I do not know the author..but so true HOW TO DRIVE IN NEW JERSEY 1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is New-erk not New-ark. (actually, it's pronounced NORK 2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m . to noon. The evening rush hour is from noon to 7:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning. 3. The minimum acceptable speed on the turnpike is 85 mph. On the parkway it's 105 or 110. Anything less is considered "Wussy." 4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Jersey has its own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires go second. However, in Monmouth county, SUV-driving, cellphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way. 5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended, cussed out, and possibly shot. 6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can get you shot. 7. Road construction is permanent and continuous in all of Jersey. Detour barrels are moved around for your entertainment pleasure during the middle of the night to make the next day's driving a bit more exciting. 8. Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks, barrels, cones, celebs, rubber-neckers, shredded tires, cell-phoners, deer and other road kill, and the homeless feeding on any of these items. 9. Mapquest does not work here -- none of the roads are where they say they are or go where they say they do and all the Turnpike ez pass lanes are moved each night once again to make your ride more exciting. 10. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the shoulder immediately to let them know it has been "accidentally activated." 11. If you are in the left lane and only driving 70 in a 55-65mph zone, you are considered a road hazard and will be "flipped off" accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot. 12. Do not try to estimate travel time -- just leave Monday afternoon for Tuesday appointments, by noon Thursday for Friday and right after church on Sunday for anything on Monday morning.
1 person likes this
4 responses
@mummymo (23707)
10 Jul 07
Well I am from neither of these places but this really made me laugh! I will never complain about our traffic again , I thought it was bad until I read this! Thank you so much for posting this honey - I really enjoyed it! xx
1 person likes this
@shambuca (2560)
• United States
10 Jul 07
Well I live here and it's funny but unfortunately true...LOL slightly exagerated of course!!!
@shambuca (2560)
• United States
10 Jul 07
Yes and i have to live here...lol
• United States
10 Jul 07
LMAO. This is very funny and true. Thanks for sharing!
1 person likes this
@shambuca (2560)
• United States
10 Jul 07
yes - I know!!! lol
• United States
10 Jul 07
People in New York and Jersey drive crazy and you forgot to mention cab drivers in the city. These are some good tips for people willing to risk driving in Jersey or New York.
1 person likes this
@shambuca (2560)
• United States
10 Jul 07
Sorry - thanks- maybe someone can add the cabbie point of view.
@ibuemma (2954)
• United States
10 Jul 07
That's hilarious. I used to live in Jersey City, and I never want to drive there. I rather took the bus or train even taxi. Now I live in PA, i still don't want to drive to that state. if we gotta go to visit family, I let my hubby drive.
1 person likes this
@shambuca (2560)
• United States
10 Jul 07
I live in Perth Amboy by the Staten Island crossing--- always traffice here.