my niece part 2

@Ravenladyj (22937)
United States
July 20, 2007 7:01am CST
First off thank you to everyone who responded to the thread and all your positive words...Here is an update for you all.... She's been here for a week now and though the first day or so was a little tense (only mildly) she's relaxed, acting like a kid again - even though she's almost 16 you can tell she NEEDED to get in touch with that inner child since due to how her life has been growing up she never really had the chance (for example she was never allowed to have friends), her spirits are up, her attitude is positive and things are goin very well.... I got the needed forms for her so she can get her Birth Cert and her SIN card and I'll help her fill those out and when my husband does take her back to Canada I told my niece I'd write a cheque for the cost of both so she doesnt have to worry about it and my husband will mail them there so we KNOW it gets done...We are goin to make a resume for her, my hsuband is goin to help her out with how to do job interviews (she's terrified)....Her and I have been talking at length on all sorts of things from her making proper choices to how she needs to find better ways to deal with stress (she is a cutter) etc...I gave her some of my clothes that dont fit (the clothes she brought were few and in rough shape) and I told her that if I can round up the money we'll go shopping and get her some decent new clothes for school and work etc.. She's been very good at helping out aroudn the house to the point that I got frustrated with the kids for OVER stackin the dishes in the sink the other night (my son had a friend here for a few days too so it was 4 of them and i even put him to work LOL)...I made them do the dishwasher and when it was done my niece ended up cleaning the whole flippin kitchen :-0 When I found out I thanked her and told hr that was really nice and she gave me a hug and said "its no problem Auntie, you're really helpin me out so its the least I can do"...I was so proud of her...Well my husbnad and I had a talk the next night and he suggested that we give her an allowance while she is here since the kids get one and she is family etc..so as of today she'll get $15 a week PROVIDED she helps out with the chores....She was just thrilled about that too...and I told her that as temptin as it may be to blow it all at Walmart she needs to be sensible and she agreed... She has come to me on numerous occasions to talk about all sorts of things and you can tell she still doubts herself BUT slowly thats getting better whihc is great....I think that partly has to do with the fact that being with us she is treated like a person, she's respected and included in things which is something she's never experienced anywhere else....We love her unconditionally and she knows it which means so much to her ya know....she's not a pawn, a slave or a punching bag (verbal, physical or in any sense) so she's definately more at ease here which of course makes it easier for her to see and think clearly... anyway, thank you all again so very much for your positive words and vibes...I greatly appreciate it!!
1 person likes this
3 responses
• United States
20 Jul 07
Thank you for the update!! It sounds like she really is a remarkable person indeed. Just needs love and sunshine to grow in :) It's really great that she recognizes and appericate the help that you all are giving her and wants to do her part around the house. Your friend has no idea on what a wonderful person she just pushed out of her life.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Jul 07
This is wonderful to hear! I'm glad that things are going well for her now, and that she's working out well in your household! I do have to say, though, that times sure have changed since I was a teenager. $15 for allowance is an amazing amount! I only got about $5 a week when I was in high school!
@Ravenladyj (22937)
• United States
23 Jul 07
LOL yea it does seem like a lot to many but we gear allowance to their ages....so my daughter gets $12, my son gets $13 (will be upped to 14 on his bday in Oct) so since my niece is 15 we figure its only fair to do the same with her....
@MsTickle (24980)
• Australia
23 Jul 07
You are giving this child some precious gifts and allowing her self esteem to grow. How lucky she is to have you. I like the sound of her. She sounds like she is becoming a wonderful person and i'm sure she'll continue to grow. You seem to be giving her enough life education to grow herself instead of being pushed around and forced into situations she's not ready for. You're an angel and your husband is a good bloke too. :)