People Who Just Drop Out of Your Life

@worldwise1 (14887)
United States
July 21, 2007 6:41pm CST
What do you do when people whom you have had a close relationship with just seem to drop out of your life? I have noticed this about two people who have been in my life for quite some time. One of them, forever. Should you take it as a personal affront? You know that you did nothing to drive them out of your life, you just look up one day and they are not there any more. It is very hurtful when you have been close to someone.
3 people like this
11 responses
@UDDERONES (888)
• United States
22 Jul 07
I know what you mean. I had a friend who I was friend with for like 5 years. She moved to another state. She said she would call me. Well she has called like 2 times. She was just back in town and was suppose to come visit me on two different occasions. She never showed up. It really hurt my feelings. I guess I was close to her, but she was not close to me. I don't know why people do this, I guess they find others and move on. I am not like this, if I am your friend, I am your friend.
2 people like this
@worldwise1 (14887)
• United States
22 Jul 07
You're right, udderones. The only circumstance in which I would walk away from a friendship is if I felt that I had been terribly wronged.
• Israel
22 Jul 07
i also agree with UDDERONES
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (44036)
• United States
22 Jul 07
I sometimes might be guilty a bit for not keeping in contact with someone myself...when I was going through all the "garbage" my mother created in my life, I just plain didn't have time to contact certain people in my life...Now only recently I did write a letter to my cousin in Mexico--haven't heard from her...also a dear friend of mine who was like a little brother to me...same thing..and haven't heard...the worse is my Aunt Carol--my father's sister out in CA...I made sure I had sent her a nice birthday card...I had one time called and left a message...I've emailed her...nothing, nada...like I'm beginning to wonder..gee, did I do something wrong? I don't think so...Well...I just keep trying to track these people down...Maybe even though you and I may have been close to these "missing in action" people...maybe it's some kind of sign to let go??? People can be sure weird...no?? LOL
2 people like this
@worldwise1 (14887)
• United States
22 Jul 07
Yes, pyewacket, there are two specific people that I am referring to. These were not just casual friends. One even called me "sister." I do know that he had gotten involved with a questionable woman, but that's no reason to throw away a close friendship. I am the kind of friend who would never interfere in a friend's personal relationship.
@maddysmommy (16236)
• United States
22 Jul 07
I have a couple of close friends who I don't keep in touch with anymore. It's mostly because I have moved on, married and moved away so I guess I lost touch. They are pretty much in the same place and doing the same thing and seem to enjoying their lives where they are. I have reunited with a cousin recently after a big fallout. That was hard to get over but I am happy we were able to patch things up. We seem to be a lot closer now than before the fallout.
@gabs8513 (48715)
• United Kingdom
22 Jul 07
Well this has happened to me with 3 People that I was close to but not in the Sense that they went away but in the sense that they passed away and I knew I would never see them again
1 person likes this
@worldwise1 (14887)
• United States
22 Jul 07
It's sad when anyone leaves us, gabs, but it's more painful than I thought it would be for a friend to just walk away from you.
1 person likes this
@gabs8513 (48715)
• United Kingdom
22 Jul 07
Yes it is I say that is harder to when a Person passes As the Person knows and intended to The ones that pass away can not control it, when the time comes But your Friend that walked away made that her choice so that will hurt even more specially if they do not say why I am so sorry this happened to you Sweet
@wonderful1 (2076)
• China
22 Jul 07
Once I had a good friend, I think we can keep in touch with each other forever, but now we lose connection. When I went to a univeristy, she was still live in our hometown, then we often give calls or send e-mail, but after few years, we don't connect each other. Frankly, now I feel very sad to lose such a good friend. Do you think a friendship can last forever if you can't live together?
1 person likes this
@worldwise1 (14887)
• United States
22 Jul 07
Some people can maintain a relationship with their friend over any distance forever, wonderful. I guess it's like anything else. You have to put in the effort.
• Singapore
22 Jul 07
Yeah, I have to agree that it can be upsetting when close friends simply vanish. It's happened to me on a few occasions. I guess we just have to accept that sometimes circumstances do change for whatever reasons and that we'll just have to move on. This happened because they have moved overseas and some also got married. I guess they sort of vanished because they now have their own lives and need to keep their spouses company, not much time for old friends unfortunately. Meanwhile, I'm so glad to have met new friends along the way, they have been a constant source of comfort to me even though I've lost touch with some old ones, the presecence of the new ones make it easier to manage.
1 person likes this
• United States
22 Jul 07
Try to contact them and find out what the problem is. They could just have had a huge thing happen in their lives and they need some time to adjust.
1 person likes this
@Shaun72 (15968)
• Palatka, Florida
22 Jul 07
Yes it is hurtful when people or your old friends decide they don't want to have anything to do with you. It is hurtful I have had it done to me before I never understood why either.
@venshida (4837)
• United States
22 Jul 07
I have had that happen to me a couple of times. I had a friend I went to high school. She lived in Florida and over the years the relationship start slipping and now it's non existent. I called a couple of times, but never got any call backs after several months of doing this I just gave up.
• United States
22 Jul 07
i had a few friends that i had in my life forever..one day just dropped out..no signs or words to tell me.. yrs later they got in touch with me trying to reconnect..i was happy to know they where ok..and some had reasons and some others just said they dont know. but one thing they didnt think that how bad it hurt.. we tried to get our friendships back but its hard as u never know when they will just drop out again. so it hasnt been the same..
@wolfie34 (26793)
• United Kingdom
22 Jul 07
Relationships just like friendships are a two way thing and you can only bridge the gap so far, if they are not prepared to compromise and meet you half way then you have to ask yourself why. It is certainly not your problem, they may have moved on or have a lot on their plate and just need a gentle reminding. I always contact the person TWICE after the second time if they still haven't responded then the ball is in their court it's their decision, if they don't want to get in touch, their loss! Don't take it personally my good friend