Trying to buy a home

@myfanwy65 (1030)
United States
July 24, 2007 7:40am CST
When you look at a home to see if you want to buy it, you mentally move into that home. You make it your own, if only in your mind. You decide where the furniture will go. You hang pictures. You imagine yourself sleeping in your bed in the bedroom. You imagine yourself and your family living in the house, going about your ever day activities. You imagine what you will do differently with the yard. When find out someone else bought it or your finance company changed their minds, it is as if someone has stolen your home from you. Your dreams were a waste of time. It is heartbreaking. We are trying to buy a house and this keeps happening to us over and over. It's like losing a family member every time we like a house and can't buy it for some reason or another. It makes you want to give up and just stay where you are.
1 person likes this
10 responses
• United States
24 Jul 07
We are currently in the process of buying a home as well. It took us a while to find one that was big enough but that also fit into our budget. We are hoping for a closing date today. I got tired of liking a house and then not being able to get it. So when my husband went to look at this house, I refused to even go see it until we had at least been pre approved for the amount. Good luck I hope you find something soon
@makingpots (11922)
• United States
24 Jul 07
good luck melissa, I hope all works out for you today.
@myfanwy65 (1030)
• United States
24 Jul 07
I know exactly how you felt. We are having the same problem. Finding something that is big enough that we can afford to pay for. We have been pre-approved. Then the finance company said they changed their mind. So, we had to find another lender that would work with us. While we were doing that, a house we really liked sold. We were one day late. It was heartbreaking.
@lingli_78 (12844)
• Australia
25 Jul 07
i perfectly understand what you mean... i had done some house hunting as well in the past... but fortunately for me and my hubby, we manage to find our dream house quite fast... we don't have to wait for too long... we fight for it and we have to pay a little bit extra... but that's alright... we will be moving in next month... good luck for you... hope you will manage to get your dream house soon...
@myfanwy65 (1030)
• United States
25 Jul 07
Thanks. Congratulations on finding your dream home. Hopefully we will too, soon.
@creematee (2810)
• United States
24 Jul 07
I know exactly what you mean! I truely feel for you. It's so disappointing to have your dream taken away. My husband and I found a home that we thought we were destined to have. It was really run down, and a repossessed home. Our realtor at the time, refused to show it to us. By the time we contacted the realtor selling it, they had already accepted the bid. I cried for days. I absolutely hate driving by that house now, because it's been remodeled and renonated, and it is so beautiful! I'll wish you the best of luck with your adventure. Your dream home is out there waiting for no one but you!
@myfanwy65 (1030)
• United States
24 Jul 07
Thanks! I really hope so.
@Willowlady (10666)
• United States
24 Jul 07
It pays to not be invested in a property, car, clothing etc until you have the paper signed or the receipt. That way you are not emotional damaged when situations change. The right time will occur and the right property will appear. It takes time and being ready for when it will surprisingly be there. Good luck and I hope that the right property comes your way soon.
@myfanwy65 (1030)
• United States
24 Jul 07
Thanks. I hope so too. It's hard not to get emotionally involved, at least for me it is.
@makingpots (11922)
• United States
24 Jul 07
We were warned about this before we bought our home. A wise friend recommended that we make a list of the things that the house 'must have', 'it would be nice if it had', and 'can't live with this'. Then as you look be concerned only with how many things on the lists that the house measures up to. It was all about a transaction on paper until we found the house that measured up perfectly and it kept us from getting emotionally attached too early. Sure, you want to be emotionally attached before making an offer but somehow this kept things in perspective for us. Don't give up, the perfect house is out there for you. There is a reason why the others fell through, just move on because it will be worth it in the end.
@myfanwy65 (1030)
• United States
24 Jul 07
Thanks, I really hope so. It's so heartbreaking. That's good advice. I will try that. :D
@munhozmib (3853)
• Sao Paulo, Brazil
24 Jul 07
Hello, Myfanwy! I don't know how hard it is to buy a new house... I am not able to buy my own house yet, as I am 15 years old, but I really expect to buy one when I get older. You know, I don't want to live with my parents forever. I want to get married, have my kids, and live in our house. It would simply sound great! I just know that, some years ago, my mother started asking my father to buy us a new house. Even though she knews it's expensive, she kept on asking. One day, my father started looking for prices and stuff... He looked, she looked as well... After one year, they bought this house, which I'm living in right now. It was great! And he did it. So, I believe that, as long as you have the money, you can buy a new house if you put enough efforts.
@myfanwy65 (1030)
• United States
24 Jul 07
Thanks. I guess I just need to believe we will find the house we are meant to have when it is supposed to happen. It's so frustrating, though.
@wendy805 (261)
• China
24 Jul 07
i haven't met with such kind of problems yet,because i can not afford it and i am not married, i don't need to buy a house. however when saw what happened to you. it just occurred to me that " oh my god, there is someone who can't buy a house even if he wants to, and he can afford it." so i always think that what we need to buy a house is just money. now i changed my view.
@myfanwy65 (1030)
• United States
24 Jul 07
Oh yes, there is so much more to buying a house than having the money. Because there are other people out there who also want to buy the same house you want. You have to beat them and make an offer first. It's really a horrible process.
@wiccania (3360)
• United States
25 Jul 07
Look at it this way... if someone else got the house, it wasn't meant to be, and in th end you're going to find (and get) a house more perfect than all the ones before. Imagine the new family moving in... and the pipes bursting, or the kitchen being infested with ants. Or something like that. Maybe it'll make you feel better.
• Malaysia
25 Jul 07
Oh... I am sorry that you are facing so much trouble trying to buy a house. Please don't be heart broken. There's always a positive outcome when a bad thing happen in our life. If you don't get a house, maybe you will get a bigger house with a better deal in the future. You just don't know about it yet, because it hasn't happen yet. Be patient, and I believe one happy day you will be able to buy a house. I am also still searching for a land to buy. I want to build my own house. Here where I live the land is much cheaper than at the town area. I have a big ambition to build my dream house. Someday... soon, I will get it. So don't worry friend, be happy and one day you will get your house. Good luck. Have a nice day.
@mfashraf (17)
• Malaysia
25 Jul 07
The best thing for you to do is to get things organized.. You should clear up your debts so that you're not blacklisted in the financial company.. Once you've clear that up, you should browse through the houses and see which one fits your family best. Please consider in mind that will this house be your retirement house too or just your house until you can get a better house.. Also consider that in the future, how many family members will be staying at your house.. My family is currently looking for houses and whenever we wanted to buy the house, somebody got there first.. Its really frustrating. but once you've found a suitable house, you will like it a lot. These things take time. So make up your mind because its a lot of money that you want to invest on