Military Service

United States
August 1, 2007 9:05am CST
I heard last night of a set of parents who were having trouble with their 19 year old son. He was constantly in trouble, wouldn't get a job and running around all night and wanting to sleep all day. He had quit college and moved back home. The father layed down the law and told him he had 3 choices, get a job, move out or join the military. Do you think this was right of the parents to do this?
3 people like this
7 responses
@gabs8513 (48715)
• United Kingdom
1 Aug 07
Yes I think they did in a sense but then again why have they waited this long to put the force on Why did they not put the law down and explain to him when he left School about getting a Job I really hope that they are able to sort him out
2 people like this
• United States
11 Sep 07
I don't think they have waited. I think he is just a hard head and thought they would give in. He kept saying I'm going to do it next week. Or I'm waiting on so and so to call me. He's going to get me a job where he works. He was playing them big time.
• United States
1 Aug 07
Not only was it fair, I would have taken it one step further and said get a job AND pay us rent, move out, or join the military. The only additional option I would have given was to return to school full-time. The son is an adult and he needs to grow up and become a responsible adult. His father is doing what birds do to their babies when they are old enough to fly, he is pushing him out of the nest. If the father did not do this, he could very easily end up supporting his slacker son for many, many years.
2 people like this
• United States
11 Sep 07
I agree with you fully. The kid has decided to join the army. I think it is a very good decision for him. It will force him to grow up and be a man. I know it's hard to grow up, but I had to do it...didn't you?
• United States
1 Aug 07
YES I DO THEY Are doing him no favours coddling him he is an adult and needs to learn what life is aLL About!
2 people like this
• United States
11 Sep 07
I agree. Didn't we all have to come to a point in our lives where we had to take responsibility for ourselves? I got married when I was 20. I couldn't imagine living with my parents at that point. I can't get over these young couples, some with kids, living with one set of parents and basically mooching. Help is one thing. But taking advantage is quite another.
@terri0824 (4991)
• United States
1 Aug 07
I think the father is being fair. He isn't helping his son any by allowing him to just be irresponsible in his home. Some children need this push, to get them motivated. I've given my 18 year old daughter until September 15 to get a full time job, which she is doing currently and to also finish her schooling, GED - High School Diploma, I don't care which one it is at this stage of the game, but she has to get it finished. If she can't accomplish this, she knows that she will have to find a place to live by this time.
2 people like this
• United States
11 Sep 07
My son is at this point too. Although, he has decided to at least take his ASVAB. He finished high school, but doesn't want to go to college. He went last year, and did well...made the dean's list even, but then decided at the last minute that College wasn't for him.
@sunshinecup (7881)
1 Aug 07
Well sure it was. They gave him three choices that are very logical and in his best interest. Not saying the military is a tool to push our kids into, but it is an option. I think there was nothing wrong with that and in fact if my kids act like that at that age, I don't think I will say anything different to mine as these parents did to theirs.
2 people like this
• United States
11 Sep 07
I'm just about at the point with my son. He's not going back to collegee this fall, but has decided that he doesn't have to get a full time job. I told him guess again. He's not happy with me, but he's getting over it or getting out. I'm not going down that road.
@ElicBxn (60895)
• United States
2 Aug 07
The brat is an adult, not 5 yrs old. I think that his father was being VERY reasonable. I'd've probably just kicked his butt out the door & if I co-signed on the car, take it away unless the kid can make the payments. That 19 yr old is certainly old enough to have to face responsablities & its time for him to grow up! Saying this from someone who's roomie's jerk brother is back living at his folks because they "don't want him living on the streets." I mean, COME ON!!! He's 40 &*(^$* yrs old!!! He should at LEAST be paying RENT!
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Sep 07
I certainly agree with you there. I'm 40. I had to move back in with my parents to take care of my mother after she had a stroke. I hated it. Hated being seperated from my hubby for one until he could sell our house and move down here...but an adult should not live with their parents.
@ElicBxn (60895)
• United States
11 Sep 07
Your taking care of your parents, he's just sponging off them. In fact, both of the boys are jerks, makes her dad mean when the jerk is around. WOULD you BELIEVE that he was going to have a BBQ for his mom for her birthday - then the JERK expected her to cook!!!! I'd've told him that "its my birthday, I'm not cooking." They just suck up to the jerk. Gee, I wonder why I'm single & don't have kids....
@mi2ok02 (406)
• United States
1 Aug 07
Yes! He is being a deadbeat and a moocher. It is time for him to make his own way in life and sometimes you have to push the bird out of the nest. It is called tough love. If they do it now, it will be much easier for him to become a productive adult for society rather than waiting for him to do it on his own. The older he gets, the harder it will be for him to make that independent transition.
• United States
11 Sep 07
I agree. Our agreement with our kids is that if they are in school full time, that they can live here. We will help them with groceries, gas, insurance etc...But if they drop out of college, they will pay room and board, and will pay for their own cell phones, insurance (including health) etc... or they can move out.