Ladies on Abortion

United States
August 3, 2007 7:50pm CST
I posted a similar discussion for men, and now I'd like to hear from the ladies. What do you think about abortion in general and why? Should a man have a say in the matter, and if so, how much? Have you ever had one?
7 people like this
7 responses
@vicki2876 (5640)
• Canada
4 Aug 07
Even though I never had an abortion I do support a woman's choice to have one. I don't think the man should have a say considering it is her who has to carry the child. You really don't know what is going though a persons life that makes them feel like they need to go down that route but I am sure it is a very difficult thing to do and hard for the woman.
2 people like this
• United States
8 Aug 07
I agree with you on this....I HAVE had an abortion when I was 13 yrs old. I was raped when I was 12 and 3days after my 13th birthday my parents took my to have the abortion...It was the hardest thing I ever had to do in my life. But as a 13 yr old I don't know if I could of raised it...I know I couldn't and to love it like I should of cause it wasn't made out of love....I still think about that baby wondering what it is ,what it looks like, everything about it...I even I look at my daughters now wonder if that baby would of looked like them at all? But I would never have a abortion now enless I was raped! I do think the woman can make that choice for herself and that baby...I didn't have the choice my parents made that choice for me....
3 people like this
• United States
23 Oct 07
See stuff like this infuriates me and makes me ache for humankind. To force a child to go through that trauma... I'd venture a guess and say that in most cases it'd be less traumatizing to allow a thirteen year old to have the child and just raise him/her as her sibling. Because at the very least, you would know exactly what your baby looked like, felt like, smelled like, and who he/she would become. Being a single mom through "unfortunate circumstances", I guarantee that once you bond with your child, you forget that they even have a sperm donor.
1 person likes this
@breepeace (3028)
• Canada
18 Dec 07
Statistically, ALL abortions are safer than delivery. Couple that in with the trauma of having a young person experience the pain and agony of giving away something that they nourished inside their body for 9 months and then spent anywhere from 1 to 40 hours pushing out of their wahoo, and I think anyone picking delivery for it's 'less traumatic' side is slightly mentally challenged. I love how people can consider a 7 week old fetus a baby and think that a women could grow attached to it and feel unbelievable remorse, and then think a full term baby is a piece of cake to discard.
2 people like this
@lilaclady (28270)
• Australia
4 Aug 07
Being an extra independent type of female I say no, it is the woman who has to go through the nine months of making the baby, it is the woman who has to go through all the pain, it is the woman who basically has to change her life for approximately 18 years at least, a man carries on the same, he may have to go without a little please for awhile and perhaps supply a little more money, I think every one owns their own body what you do with that body should be up to you, good or bad, if a man and woman gets married things should be talked out before the ceremony, and definitely if a man and woman are not married then I don't think he should have any say what so ever. I hope I haven't upset anyone as this is not my intention, I just think we are all responsible for our own journey and the package we travel in....
• United States
8 Aug 07
Well who do you think help the woman get pregnant. Of course the man has a right. It is his baby as well.
3 people like this
@eden32 (3978)
• United States
8 Aug 07
"Well who do you think help the woman get pregnant. Of course the man has a right. It is his baby as well." If men were intended by nature to have an equal say in pregnancies, then men would carry them for 20 or so weeks of the 40 total, or make milk after their child is born or in some way have some biological role other than dropping a viable sperm cell.
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Aug 07
I think abortions are really ignorant. There are plenty of couples who would die to have children but can't. My sister cannot have kids and i told her that she should adopt. I understand that giving up your child after you carried it for 9 months is hard. But if you want to kill the child i think you should keep it alive and give it to someone who would be able to show it the love that you can't/won't give to it. I know more than one person that would love to have someone else's child to take care of. My ex boyfriend and his sister were both adopted and they thank the lord every day that their mothers didn't have abortions. If a woman was raped or can risk dying during birth then i could see that but anything other than that it's MURDER.
2 people like this
@eden32 (3978)
• United States
4 Aug 07
I think that thinking you have the right to tell others what to do with their bodies is what's really ignorant. Women who happen to be fertile do not owe it to any other woman to bear children for them. If your sister or whomever wishes to be a parent there are 100s of thousands of babies & children already in the adoption/foster systems in nearly every country around the world. Or hey, you can be her surrogate & then tell us about how easy it is to surrender a child you've carried for 40 weeks. Do you think birth mothers don't love their children? Do you think that children are on par with dogs that turn out not to be good pets & can just be handed over to another family who would do a "better" job with it than you can?
2 people like this
• United States
8 Aug 07
so sacrificial, you don't think abortion is MURDER? you are so very ignorant also. Abortion is the mutilation of babies that have a heart, body, nerves, etc. They can feel pain just like anyone else and whomever says otherwise is stupid. By the way, a baby deserves to live whether he/she is a product of rape, incest, stupidity, and any other circumstance there is. Oh, and one more thing, a person who is against abortion is against it now matter what the circumstance is. You can't be partial to it. Either you are or you aren't. And I bet GOD cries everytime someone insensitive murders a baby no matter how far along the mother is. Just my 2 cents. Have a great day!
@breepeace (3028)
• Canada
18 Dec 07
I am definitely pro choice. It's my body and no one should have the right to tell me what I am and am not allowed to do with it. Legally (and in my mind, morally) speaking.. a first trimester FETUS is NOT a baby. A baby is aware of it's surroundings. A fetus has no awareness and no pain sensations until after the fifth month of pregnancy. I feel abortion is a responsible decision when a woman cannot handle the pregnancy or properly take care of the prospective child. If she WERE to carry it to full term, her chances of keeping the child raise by up to %95. For an unprepared, young and possibly impoverished pregnant woman this could spell disaster for both her and the child. The entire concept of abortion being 'murder' is a twisted mind-fcuk started by the Catholic church (and thus other Christian denominations) to increase the number of their parishioners exponentially. Power in numbers and all that. If you aren't allowed to use birth control to control pregnancy, and you aren't allowed to seek an abortion if you get pregnant when you're unprepared, and the only option you're really presented with is abstinence (which doesn't make sense, considering that you can't honestly expect a happily married couple to only have relations when they're trying to procreate!), that seems like a ridiculous but highly effective way to get the uber-religious masses to create more and more minds to grow up and become uber religious, as well.
2 people like this
@lecanis (16739)
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
4 Aug 07
I think a woman should consult the man in the matter, but I don't see how it could really be made mandatory. To force a woman to carry and deliver a child is essentially slavery. If a man wants the child, and the woman wants to have an abortion, then it's a really sad situation, but I don't see how you could really force a woman to go through with a pregnancy she doesn't want without totally destroying her rights as a human being. I've been through one pregnancy, and I had a lot of complications. I had seizures the entire time I was pregnant, like the grand mal kind where you flail around, and lose control of bodily functions, and all kinds of lovely things like that. They never found out why I had them, but since they stopped after I had my son, it kind of got chalked up to some weird pregnancy thing. Now, I know not every woman has the kind of pregnancy I had, but any pregnancy comes with a lot of pain, permanent physical and hormonal changes, and I just can't see forcing anyone to go through that if they aren't willing to. I haven't had an abortion, but there was a point when I thought I was pregnant and turned out not to be where I would have had one, because I was very young and had been raped.
2 people like this
@eden32 (3978)
• United States
4 Aug 07
I am pro-choice. Being pregnant & having children is a life-altering experience, entering into it for any reason other than you choose to is unthinkable to me. A man can choose whom he shares his body with before a pregnancy occurs. If his partner & he do not see eye to eye on a subject as huge as this they're probably not a well matched couple. As to the last question- it's not anyone's business if I or any other woman has ever terminated a pregnancy. A termination is a private, medical procedure- it's between her & her health care provider and whomever else she may choose to share that information with.
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Aug 07
Yeah, the whole discussion is optional sweetie. No one is forcing you to answer anything. A little background is pretty helpful in determining how people form their ideas and opinions however. If it's not a bad thing, why should you be uncomfortable discussing it? No need to get defensive. I have the right to ask which questions I please, just as you have to the right to refrain from taking part in a discussion.
2 people like this
@eden32 (3978)
• United States
5 Aug 07
"A little background is pretty helpful in determining how people form their ideas and opinions however. If it's not a bad thing, why should you be uncomfortable discussing it? No need to get defensive. I have the right to ask which questions I please, just as you have to the right to refrain from taking part in a discussion." I don't think I was defensive at all. If I (or any other responder) have had a termination or not, doesn't negate or validate their opinions on them. I'm assuming you haven't had one, yet I believe you that you would not ever have one in the future. Nor is it a matter of thinking it's a "bad" thing, it's a private thing. Medical procedures are by law confidential, if someone chooses to disclose their information that's their business but asking for it is not appropriate imo.
1 person likes this
• United States
6 Aug 07
If you didn't think it was appropriate, why did you answer? Many people ask if others have had surgeries, tubal ligation, given birth, etc.... all of which are medical procedures or processes. Yet I have yet to see someone get so defensive in saying that medical history os confidential when it pertains so such things. In future, when you read a discussion of mine, don't respond to it if you feel uncomfortable responding to each question posed. If you still insist on responding, don't expect any apologies for my requests.
2 people like this
@aries_0325 (3062)
• Philippines
12 Jan 08
Yes, I am also a Pro Life advocate and I am against in abortion. Abortion is an absolutely wrong and it is a crime of murder. And absolutely I am not favor for this. And I think the fetus have life and like us she/he have a right to see this wonderful world.