Affection and courtesy -is too much of affection wrong?

@kalav56 (11502)
India
August 10, 2007 9:49am CST
I always as a child thought that we need to be nice to people, be caring and affectionate, look only at the good qualities of people because generally everyone is good and open-hearted. But after a very long time, I have come to realise that people do not look for open-hearted affection[uncles , aunts, cousins] and only think that you are cheap and take you for granted. They do not give the respect that we fifty year olds give our youngsters. Even very close siblings take you for granted and I find this strange. Why should there be games between close people? Personally I feel that there must be transparency in any relationship. I realise my folly and have come to the conclusion that there must be absolute detachment, but can anyone share similar thoughts?
3 responses
@vinzen (1022)
• India
10 Aug 07
Hi, yes you are right and now a days that affection, love , respect etc, its all missing and its all superficial, just a put on act, no one really means it from the heart. I too have faced and felt the same way, and on the other side,i am also the kind to believe that we must be caring, affectinate, understanding and loving to each other, be humane and humble,and i find that its me only whose like this where as other people tend to take advantage of me then. Its the changing times, the new revolution thats taken over that the thoughts of people and youngsters have changed to this, it sad, but true, and very rarely you willcome across a true affectionate person.
@kalav56 (11502)
• India
10 Aug 07
How right you are! But as you pointed out we should not lose our faith in the ultimate goodness of people because it will make us very cynical and weird. Now that we know we will be taken advantage of, we can cultivate detachment and view others with a better eye though not necessarily a suspicious eye. We just need to be on our guard.Thank you for your kind response. I feel happy that there are others thinking the same way.
@jofielc (205)
• United States
10 Aug 07
All in extreme its dangerous, so a lot affect may be difficult to hold. Therefore dont be so courteus with others they can misinterpret your feelings.
@kalav56 (11502)
• India
10 Aug 07
Absolutely true and anything must be measured.Thank you.
@tuffy999 (794)
• Philippines
10 Aug 07
one has to hold back a little. giving too much will not be good for the giver and the receiver.
@kalav56 (11502)
• India
10 Aug 07
True and I should say that I realised this quite late. On the other hand younsters these days are wiser.Thanks a lot for your response.