HONESTLY, DO U still get attracted to another person after u GET MARRIED?

@joshboz (1214)
Australia
August 10, 2007 10:52pm CST
i want to know if other people have the same feeling like mine? im not yet married but i am in a relationship. we got no problems and we love each other BUT sometimes i got the mutual feeling of getting attracted mutually to another person.why this feelings happen?is this really my characteristic or is it basically a human aspect? please help me in answering this? i know many here are in a relationship or in committed relationship like MARRIAGE so im aksing do you get the feeling of being attracted to another person even you already have a relationship with somebody else? even if you have no problem at all or if you have any?
4 people like this
10 responses
@archer1811 (1099)
• Philippines
12 Aug 07
Honestly no, when the time I get married I promised to myself not to look for another guy, and beside getting into married life is a lifetime commitment, for me honestly after getting married I dont have any crushes or dont feel inlove with another guy than my husband, maybe because I am very much focus in my married life and I know that I am very much committed to him, and of course very much inlove to my husband. I am very much happy and thankful having my husband that's why I am contented having him in my life and nothing to ask more. Though we have ups and downs, and misunderstanding sometimes but my husband always make sure that all the problems must be settle before going to bed. Being happy and contented in a relationship dont make you look for another guy to love and beside falling inlove with another guy while you are married is against the law of God. In your case maybe you looking for the other side of your boyfriend I mean dont keep on comparing your boyfriend to someone you see or know just love him for what he is, but since you're not married it maybe normal to fall inlove in another guy but be honest to your current relationship dont be a two timer. Althoug crush is only a crush it can develop into love someday.
1 person likes this
@joshboz (1214)
• Australia
12 Aug 07
i guess i admire you for being a good person and a responsible partner. i guess your partner is very proud if he/she knows what you have just said in this discussion. wow you are a comitted and i bow down to you for that. thanks for sharing what you know about this question i guess im awaken to be motivated and to be a good partner too in my own case.
@jatamogue (367)
• Philippines
12 Aug 07
That must be something. I think it something to be discussed with your mate. You could be attracted but it depends how you act on that attraction. If it is entertained, most likely, the attraction will grow.
@joshboz (1214)
• Australia
12 Aug 07
yes i think ill tell her what i feel about what i feel to prevent any confrontation. thank you very much for your respond. it's helpful.
2 people like this
@ayris77 (1304)
• Malaysia
11 Aug 07
If we still have a deep feeling to others person,yes we will but do not demolish our current relationship.We are a human,have many wish just to satisfied our self.But for the first 1-3 years marriage we will still have that feeling,but after that,if we have some children and we give full comitment with our amily,yes ,we will overcome that feeling!
1 person likes this
@joshboz (1214)
• Australia
11 Aug 07
thank you for your answer. i guess it's really came from an experience frined i can feel it. good answer. thanks. i will remember that.
1 person likes this
@crazed_moma (1054)
• United States
11 Aug 07
I do still find other men atractive and I know he finds other women atractive so I would say yes, you are normal. IMO it doesn't matter what you feel it matters how you react. :)
1 person likes this
@joshboz (1214)
• Australia
11 Aug 07
yepee. okay i got one respondent that is like me. yes atleast your right moma may be it's the reaction what matter most. okay thank you.
1 person likes this
@Bujoyseth (1684)
• Philippines
12 Aug 07
that's normal joshboz! everybody is attracted to somebody else even if they're married. the important thing there for us to remember is that, how do we handle that attraction to someone without hurting our partners feelings.. anyway, it's only an attraction an we have to make it that way only, never let it grow for it may harm your relationship with your partner.. anyway, it will depend on you on how you react on that kind of attraction you have... i myself is attracte to someboy else an yet i'm married.. the thing is, me an my husband are open to each other, we open up to each other if we are attracted to somebody else....
@joshboz (1214)
• Australia
13 Aug 07
wow that's good at least both of you have the guts to open up your mistakes. that's good for a long lasting relationship. i admire you for opening your case to this discussion. thank you for responding friend.
@Bujoyseth (1684)
• Philippines
14 Aug 07
yes my friend. being open to your partner is i think one of the most important ingredient in having a good and happy married life... this will surely make you relationship last forever.. anyway, just always bear in mind that aside from your parents, your partner is the next closest to you and the one who can understand and support you no matter what!
@ssh123 (31104)
• India
12 Aug 07
Neighbours wife is beautiful. This adage holds good. Psychologically, everyone feels someone is better than his wife/her busband. They also have imagination of someone's in mind. The societal restrictions, and fear of illicit relations, love of wife/husband prevents a person to go for after the other person.
@joshboz (1214)
• Australia
13 Aug 07
i dont know what is the meaning of the saying neighbors wife is beautiful. this adage holds good. but i like it's sound. im sorry cant understand but the other part of the respond is what i can understand. yes may be psychology is right, it's really in our mind but i think in respect to social rules and sociology studies. thanks for this evidience of psychology why do we get attracted to other. i think ill read more about it if i have time.
1 person likes this
@ssh123 (31104)
• India
15 Aug 07
It is an adage. When a person gets married, after sometime, he feels that his neighbour's wife looks more beautiful than his own wife.
@mtdewgurl74 (18122)
• United States
13 Aug 07
Just because your in a marriage or a committed relationship doesn't mean your feelings die. Sure you can be attracted to other people. That is life. It is the respect and love that you hold in your heart for your loved one is what keeps you from straying or supposed to. It is okay to appreciate the good looks or being attracted to someone as long as you don't act on it. As the saying that has been around forever goes, You can look, but don't touch.
@joshboz (1214)
• Australia
13 Aug 07
okay i guess you are right. dont touch and dont bite nor blink one of your eye to the person you are attracted with. thanks for respondng and your good comment mtdewgurl.......hope to hear more from you soon....
@williamjisir (22909)
• China
12 Aug 07
I don't take any interest in another person since I am married with a child. I love my wife and my family. I am responsible for my family. To love somebody else will cause trouble to the present marriage.
@joshboz (1214)
• Australia
13 Aug 07
hi williamjisir! oh oyu married an only child. you really need to be honest to her but i know you are. thanks for your respond. thanks for what you have shared to us... may you and your family be happier..
• United States
14 Aug 07
It's normal if you still find other people attractive even if you are in a committed relationship. There's nothing wrong with admiring someone else's beauty. However, if you are no longer attracted to your partner, I'd say something is missing. If you find others more appealing than your partner, maybe you should try to see why. I think my partner is the hottest and we are both crazy about each other. It doesn't mean we don't find other people attractive, it just means we are each other's number 1 and wouldn't trade that for the world.
@men82in (1270)
• India
14 Aug 07
Aspects and expectations are lot. We have to stiff with our pair without any prejudice. We should not loose our temper in love other than our pair or pairs. Attractions never lastslonger.