How do you feel about adoption?

@shannon76 (1234)
United States
August 20, 2007 10:04pm CST
I have to say, I feel guilty because I just don't think I could ever adopt. I love kids, and I love my child more then my own life, but I don't know how I would treat an adopted child. I would be afraid that I would treat that child differently and that I would love them differently.
1 person likes this
1 response
@suspenseful (40326)
• Canada
21 Aug 07
I am an adoptive mother and my sons are adults now. After a time, if you adopt children that resemble you and your husband, you soon forget that you did not give birth to them. That is what I found. You have to be careful of other people, though. When a mother and father adopt a child, people assume that they are cool and even tempered because they do not have the personality to be birth parents. the type in those movies and tV shows shown as those rich cold hearted people who bought a black market baby. If a mother and father are very excitable, happy go lucky, people seem to think they are trying to hard because they are very guilty. Since you already gave birth, you just have to treat the adoptive child like you did your child when he was that age. So do not worry about adoption. It is wonderful.
1 person likes this
@shannon76 (1234)
• United States
21 Aug 07
That's the thing - I don't know that I could treat an adoptive child the same as the child I have birth to. Before I had my son, I had no patients for children. Don't get me wrong, I loved kids and I especially loved my nieces. But I was glad they went home to their mother and that I didn't have to put up with them all the time. My child is totally different. I LOVE being a mother and I have endless patients with him.
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40326)
• Canada
26 Dec 07
My sons look so much like my brother, it is almost uncanny. I think it is because well their mother's family came from the same Northern part of Germany that part of my father's family came to, but whereas my father moved to British Columbia, they moved to the Prairies, so it is strange. I gave a daughter up for adoption in Vancouver, and one time when we were taking the boys for tests in Saskatoon (they were twins with a twin language) I saw this young woman and she was drawing a design just as I used to do when I was young. So maybe I did see my daughter and did not know about it. So it could be if you saw a child who looked like you or your brother or sister, it might be from the same area that part of your family came from and maybe a distance relative, so you will develop that familial bond.