Old Fashioned Values - do they still have any meaning today?

Group Hugs - Sometimes all you need is a big hug
August 21, 2007 9:17am CST
When I was a child I was taught manners and good behaviour. I would never dream of shouting, swearing or fighting with my parents or any other adult. I knew that I was to stay close to my parents, do what I was told, and behave properly. Any infringement of the rules was dealt with swiftly with discipline, my parents were strict but in the main very fair. These days we see children as young as 4 or 5 years old, shouting and swearing, fighting, vandalising property and generally out of control. We see kids of 6 and 7 with mobile phones, iPods and designer label clothes out on the streets late at night. We see kids with knives, taking drugs, getting drunk, causing untold trouble and damage on a daily basis. Knife crime is up, violence is normal behaviour, alcohol-fuelled vandalism is everywhere. It seems that this generation is hell bent on destruction, and the parents seem unable or unwilling to attempt any kind of discipline at all. I know I was no angel when I was a teenager, but my exploits were never so extreme as todays kids and I wonder where did it all go wrong. The family at the end of our street are a prime example of this and yet there seems to be no solution to the problems of antisocial behaviour and worse. Has society become so soft that they no longer wish to impose any kind of discipline? Are we all victims of the nanny state now? Has political correctness taken over? When I was naughty as a kid I could expect a clip around the ear or a smacked leg. Try doing that now and the authorities would be all over you like a rash and you would be taken to court for child abuse. Stand up to these louts and you risk serious personal injury or murder. I hate to sound like an old misery, a fuddy duddy or a killjoy but having see the kids around here today, behaving so badly, causing damage to a lovely garden, throwing cans at cars, shouting foul verbal abuse at people in the street, I ask you - Is it time we returned to some of the old fashioned values and took control once more?
6 people like this
11 responses
@whyaskq (7553)
• Singapore
22 Aug 07
Just few days ago, I had a discussion with a friend on kids who are now in their twenties and forties today. The main difference between the twenties and forties are that those in the twenties lead pampered lives upon birth as their parents tend to be better off. They grew up in the technology age and most receive higher education. They grow up with computers and gadgets. For the forties, most have to work to help support the family and has less interest in technological advancement. Besides, those in the forties tend to have more sibblings compared to the twenties. As such, the twenties tend to have the parents' full and undivided attention especially if he is the only child. He receive the best of everything and has no chance to learn about sharing and caring in their childhood, and so habitually, most bring their pampered mindset to the society and so the society changes gradually. Imagine when they become parents themselves, what values will they impart to their younger generations? Inherited values. lol. So does old fashioned values still have any meaning today? In my opinion, most are outdated. We need to change and grow with the society and accept new values. If we still stick to the old values and impose on the young to accept the old values, this is the so-called generation gap, isn't it?
2 people like this
23 Aug 07
What a great response, just what I was hoping for thanks. Yes a lot of the old fashioned valued may be a little outdated, but morals, respect, discipline still hold true I hope.
2 people like this
@whyaskq (7553)
• Singapore
23 Aug 07
Yes, moral, respect and discipline, these I feel upholds the society and prevents it from collapsing. However, the young ones embraced it in a different way, the modern way. lol. Thanks for the best response :)
1 person likes this
@crazynurse (7510)
• United States
22 Aug 07
You are sooooo right that it seems the old-fashioned values have gone astray and need to be returned! Seems children are just fed, clothed and sent out on the streets to 'raise themselves.' Young children are calling adults by their first names, talking back to their parents, cursing like sailors and acting like animals in public places. I can't even put into words how the young children in this area act in restaurants. It is atroucious!
2 people like this
22 Aug 07
Thanks hun, it does seem that the situation is getting worse by the day
1 person likes this
@Aussies2007 (5339)
• Australia
22 Aug 07
I have noticed this problem for many years and it keeps getting worse. For my part... when I respond to this on forums... parents and kids alike will give you every excuse in the world for justifying their behaviour. They use those same excuses when the police turn up and when they appear in front of a judge. And they get released with a slap on the wrist. The reason for that is that politicians listen to their excuses as well. So for my part... I have given up. I am going to sit there and watch them self-destruct until they start realising for themselve that they are nuts. And yes... old fashioned values still have meaning today. Those who respect those values earn the respect of all the people they come in contact with. It permits them to establish long term relationships in business and on a personal level. Old fashion values do pay in many ways.
22 Aug 07
Thanks for your input hun, I appreciate your comments.
1 person likes this
@rhinoboy (2129)
21 Aug 07
I like to think that I too was brought up with decent morals, respect for adults, and a decent code of behaviour. I was certainly no angel during my teens, like most teens (I suspect) and would often drink at weekends etc. I think the difference is that we were'nt so damned blatant about it. We would procure our booze and set off to a quiet park or something to get drunk & rowdy, whereas the kids now seem to just hang around and drink it infront of the shop (or infront of some unfortunate soul's house!). I reckon that the fundamental difference is that they know they can get away with it now. The PC brigade would have a blue fit at the type of punishments I would introduce!! lol As the first reply stated (sorry didn't catch the name) it's probably still a minority of kids that turn 'ferral', but since they're so obvious and the 'good kids' are out of sight, it seems like it's a bigger problem (generally) than it actually is.
1 person likes this
22 Aug 07
It seems to be a sad fact that more and more of the *good* kids are being pressured into this behaviour too. Although I don't avocate forms of physical discipline, I was smacked when I was younger, I feel that a lot of the problem seems to stem from the lax attitude taken these days.
1 person likes this
@rhinoboy (2129)
23 Aug 07
I agree with you completely. It's generally accepted among kids now that being well behaved and working hard at school is the complete opposite of cool. I have no idea how this can be fixed. As far as discipline for children goes, I think that smacking should be avoided wherever possible, but is sometimes necessary. It's not the right way to go about it, but it is certainly a lot better than the complete lack of discipline evident in many kids today.
1 person likes this
@MsTickle (25006)
• Australia
26 Aug 07
I don't see any answers friend...no amount of positive thinking on my part will change the behaviour of those bent on destruction or just plain self involved and selfish. I think we would need to divide the world in two....pacifists and peace lovers, lovers of harmony balance and beauty etc on one side and and those selfish, violemnt, uncaring unthinking, hatefilled persons on the other. It still wouldn't solve anything because we all need to work together to achieve anything good in this world.
4 Sep 07
In the past couple of weeks the television and newspapers have been filled with even more deaths and injuries. There seems little anyone can do to stem the tide.
• Philippines
23 Aug 07
As a parent we all have the reponsibility of raising the child to beaome who will he / she be and what kind of perso will he / she be. it isjust right that we teah old values tot hem and these should have een what we shoudl be doing since we started parenting. i thinkthemedia has a great impact as well to the children now, with the kind of show they watch, we should choose shows they should watch. sometimes because of our busyness we just allow our kids to watch what ever show they want. We parents shud always be in control. well, it;s never too late to start doing the right thing. good luckto you and happy parenting.:-)
23 Aug 07
I agree that parents should be in control, it appears that an awful lot of parents have lost control though, and the current climate of pc and soft shuffle by the authorities doesn't really help the situation unfortunately. Let's hope that things change and that the majority of the *good* outweighs the bad
@mimpi1911 (25455)
• India
22 Aug 07
Hi sweet heart, i am also old fashined and love it that way. I feel technology and easy avalability of it are making today's children smart enough to design crimes. I grew up in a conservative family where high tones and swear words were considered as bad manners. We were strictly guided my grand parents and then parents and then home tutors. I feel, this severe social condition is dependent on the upbringing and the culture in which the child is brought up. the parents have a major role to play to guide their kids properly. My sisters play a near perfect mother to their children and the reason, i believe, is the way they had been brought up. The parents should keep close watch on the kids. like when they are into internet, there should be a censorship on the virtual friends they make and virtual sites they are logging in. I would never endorse spanking and stuff like that but when its really required what's there to make fuss off? afterall parents know better than outsiders, don't they?
1 person likes this
22 Aug 07
I got my fair share of clips around the ear and smacked legs when I was out of line as a kid, and although I would not advocate constant smacking, there are times when I think some of these kids could benefit from a smacked behind.
@DJules (55)
• United States
22 Aug 07
If by "Old fashioned values" you mean smacking kids, well, then I'm going to have to disagree. I'm not sure how hitting my children would help me teach them to not hit other people, or to be well-behaved. I don't consider smacking people to be good manners, and my children are people. I strive to teach by example, and am conscious of treating other people with kindness, courteousness, and respect in my day to day dealings. There are always going to be rambunctious and rude teenagers. But the teenagers I have gotten to know recently have been absolutely amazing people, don't judge a whole age group by a few bad apples. (Although if we could get them to hang up their cell phones once in a while, that would be nice.)
22 Aug 07
I do not advocate smacking, although I was on the receiving end of a clip around the ear which was nowhere near a smacking. I applaud you teaching by example, shame more of today's parents don't attempt to do the same
@twoey68 (13662)
• United States
22 Aug 07
Well, if you are an old misery, a fuddy duddy or a killjoy I'd be happy to join you. I agree with al that you had to say. Kids today for the most part are out of control and sadly that is mainly the parents fault. They either won't discipline or have just given up. Like you, I was no angel but I was no where near as bad as some of the kids today. I don't know what solution would fix the problem but your right that we need to return to some of the old fashioned values and I think we should re-institute the woodshed! AT PEACE WITHIN
1 person likes this
22 Aug 07
It's quite sad when you see these kids, especially when so many kids are good and well behaved. A little more discipline would help a lot.
@arkaf61 (10891)
• Canada
21 Aug 07
I know what you mean. I work with kids and I can see things changing each year - and not to the better in my opinion. Long time ago I believed that even though the world was changing and evolving some things like common sense and good manner would never go away, now i am not sure anymore and it's a pity.
@IcyCucky (361)
• United States
21 Aug 07
I was raised in the same values as yours. This issue sometimes bother me, because kids these days have very little respect for people around them. I don't think they know what values or principles are any more. We live in such a fancy technology, fast pace life that parents have no time to worry about disciplines. They are overwhelmed with so much pressure from work, and life itself, that they just let go. On my street, I see 2 little girls going from door to door to look for someone to play with, on a cold rainy day. They have no supervision from adults. They are on their own at 5 and 3 years of age. It is sad to see that their parents are so busy to even care about their children's safety.
1 person likes this