Divorce?

Divorce Booklet - Divorce
By MrX
@Tko2020 (266)
August 21, 2007 6:28pm CST
Do You Think Its Right For A Woman To Keep Using Her Married Surname After The Divorce Is Finalised,Or Should She Be Forced by Law To Revert To Her Maiden Name?
4 responses
@Ravenladyj (22937)
• United States
22 Aug 07
I honestly think it depends on a few various things really...first and foremost the couple in question but also the duration of the marriage as well...My mum was married to her now ex for well over 20 yrs, they divorced when I was about 19 or so (it became final then) and she STILL holds his name BUT its the name she's been associated with for decades so its just easier for her to keep it ya know..I mean all legal documents from bank accounts and credit cards to the house deed to her will etc etc etc are all in her married name....businesses shes been working with for yrs all know her by her married name and so on and since she'll never remarry it only makes sense on numerous levels for her to keep that name..
1 person likes this
@patgalca (14308)
• Orangeville, Ontario
23 Aug 07
Some more valid points that I didn't think of. I got married and had to change my driver's license, bank accounts, health card, etc. Then I got divorced. I kept the name until I became pregnant with someone else's child so I sent a formal request to the government to have my name changed back to my maiden name. Back to the bank I went, and the license bureau and the health department. Oh boy, a few years later I got married again and I had to do it all over again. What a nuisance. When I finally get my book published, what name should I go under? How many people are going to more me know under my maiden name? Or my first married name? Or my second married name?
@bhappy2 (327)
• Australia
25 Aug 07
Yes, going back to your maiden name sounds really easy until you start doing it. It's the little things you forget about, like club memberships, your references and certificates and on and on and on. I know, I am still finding things keep popping up that I didn't think about.
@bhappy2 (327)
• Australia
25 Aug 07
I don't think a woman should be forced by law to revert to her maiden name. If there are children involved it makes the choice quite difficult. When I divorced my children were adults and I talked to them and asked them how they felt about me reverting to my maiden name. I explained that as I was no longer married to their father I did not want to share his identity but wanted to reclaim my own identity. They understood my feelings and I did revert to my maiden name. However, by doing this, I lost an identity I had had for 42 years. I think it really has to be the choice of the woman and does depend entirely on her attitude and circumstances.
• United States
24 Aug 07
It totally depends on the sitution. If children are involved keeping the same last name keeps down the confusion at home, school, and anything to do with your children. My mother had remarried and some of my friends still called her by my last name and my stepfather also. He took it better than mom did. My father and my stepfather did not get along. My brother, sister and I had told our friends that our mothers last name was and that it was our stepfather. They couldn't remember. We had moved to another state to live with mom. School made the same mistakes even though they had the information at their fingertips and on all the paperwork.
@patgalca (14308)
• Orangeville, Ontario
22 Aug 07
I don't think it should be law. What if there are children involved? My sister divorced her husband when her kids were young (2 & 4), it wasn't until this year - 23 years later - that she changed her name back to her maiden name. Her kids are obviously grown and out of the house, plus I think she may have done it because she is now in a new relationship. Also, her EX's brother married a woman with the same first name as her so there ended out being two people with the same name. I didn't change my name until I got pregnant and wanted my baby born under a different name. I know it doesn't matter because you fill out the birth certificate however you please, but they do call the baby "Baby Smith" with whatever last name the mother has while you are in the hospital. I was even called Mrs. Jones (having reverted back to my maiden name but not married). Mrs. Jones was my mother! I think it should be her decision, especially since so many different circumstances need to be considered.