Are you a good mother if...

United States
August 28, 2007 12:12am CST
You allow your child to interact with other children of different values? Are you a good mother if you don't feed your child the right foods everyday? I have seen mothers who allow their children to hand out with other children who do not have the same values, and then tend to pick up on their bad habits. Me myself, would allow my child to be friends with who he/she wants but i would also tell them to be careful and voice my opinions when neccesary, and tell my child to remember who they are. I am also guilty at not feeding my child the "right" foods everyday. I try my best and that is all I can do.
2 people like this
7 responses
• Canada
28 Aug 07
I believe being a good mother is doing the best you can , one can't expect more then this . Children do not come with a manual and all you have to go on are your own instincts about what is right and what isn't . As parents we will all make mistakes just as our children will and hopefully from these will will learn and grow more . Interacting with other children can be a good thing as it shows our children that not all children are the same and not all children have parents that care as much to watch what their children are involved in or just don't have the money to be there with them as much as they should . It is good for all children to see that not everyone is the same and to interact with children that don't have the same type of values so they can see and learn for themselves what is right and wrong . With our guidance , we hope they will choose what is right in life but we can't be with them all the time to make these decisions for them so we have to trust our instincts as this is all we can do . The best parents can raise a child who is into trouble and parents who are not their to guide their children or just don't see to care about them can raise a child who is a very well liked part of society . There are so many influences in the lives of our children and we are only a part of this so just because one doesn't always make sure their child has had a balanced meal before walking out to play or allows the child to mix with children who may have bad habits does not mean that as a parent we are failing but means that we can't be with them all the time and are doing what we feel is best at the time with what we have .
1 person likes this
• Philippines
28 Aug 07
I am not yet a mother and I still have fears of being one. I don't know why. Maybe because I have fears of failing to be a good one. Then, how will we rate if you've been a good one. Are there specific rules or standards to follow? I'm afraid that's the big problem about it, there are no written rules about it. People will judge you as bad if you don't give your children what they need but if you provide too much which tend to spoil your child you will still be bad. Then where will a mother stand. But one thing is for sure, mothers are the greatest creature that God ever created. They will be able to give their child the love that no one can ever give.
1 person likes this
@r3sunz (17)
• United States
28 Aug 07
I believe that if you keep your children from other kids based on your values and beliefs as they get older they will more than likely flock towards that group that has been "off limits". We need to instill in our kids a good sense of values so that when they're confronted with those choices they have that voice inside that tells them no. As for the "right foods". Please! I am doing good to get food into my children. I do try to make their choices as healthy as possible and I offer tons of fresh fruits and veggies to balance out the ravioli and spaghettios they get occasionally.
1 person likes this
@LishaB (33)
• United States
28 Aug 07
Kim you know you're a good mama so don't worry if he eats the "wrong" foods. 2nd i would also allow my child to be friends with whoever they wanted, but if i saw a problem arising with her behavior then i would step in and say something and try and handle it. thank god we are far from that point right now with our little ones Charlee's Momma ;)
1 person likes this
• Australia
28 Aug 07
The definitition of a good mother I believe is one who gives their child the basic necessities; being nourishment, shelter and love. To be a great mother you then have to consider values and the like, I would then have to say that the definition of a great mother is one that, overall, gives their child nourishment, guidance, love, protection, shelter, consideration, compassion, education, "religion" (a belief system) and encouragement. This is the best that you can do for your child - educate them in the ways that you think are right and allow them to experiment and explore along the way so that they, themselves, can make better choices when they are standing in your shoes. I'm a "mum" myself...and it is the hardest job in the world. Just do your best. Love and laughter to you!
@kelly60 (4548)
• United States
29 Aug 07
We can't always choose our children's friends for them, nor is it possible to always feed them the perfect diet. All that we can do is the best that we can. After all, we are only human.
@vinzen (1022)
• India
28 Aug 07
Hi, i dont think that any mother is bad, or not concerned and bothered for her child. All mothers care for their children, no matter how the kids are and no matter what ways they take care of their kids. Some mothers show it, some feel it, some dont show it at all, but they all care from deep within. I dont think letting the kids interact with children of different values is bad, as i think in the long run, it makes your child stronger and bolder to face the world outside, as the world consists of all kinds of people, and we should not shelter the kids too much by always keeping them under our wings, as they would never be able learn and decipher the right from the wrong, if they dont meet the wrong people too. What we as parents can do to help is to instill the right values in our kids, and tell them what the right thing is, and then let them decipher the right from the wrong. Always keep an eye and discuss with your kids what and who they met and what they did and how they dealt with the situation, so that your guidance is always with them, where ever they may go and whom ever they may meet. Regarding eating the right kind of food, i make sure the kids have normal home cooked food, with the correct mixture of nutrients and vitamins. This again is something that is instilled and made a habit right from the start, when they are young, and something that the full family should follow ,so that kids learn by seeing us parents too , that this is the right food , that we have to eat. Sometimes of course you can go in for fast and other kinds of foods, or take the kids out for food, as that is also a learning for them and a good change from having home cooked food daily. Feeding the kids the right food, would not be the only issue to decide that you are a good mother or not, as many other things are there that make a good mother, this is inclusive though, and if you have not been giving them the right food, its never too late to start. Yes, you can try your level best to change yourself a little so that you feed them food with the right nutrients, as its for their betterment and would help them when they grow up.