how to deal with sick men?

United States
September 2, 2007 10:50am CST
Just how can you deal with a grouchy sick man? Mine had a infected tooth,which caused his ear to hurt, got him into a denist,got medicine for it, then it still hurt him, got him to the denist, they took the two messed up teeth out and now he is still hurting,but now more so in the ear.Well he has been worse than any sick kids I have ever taken care of.I can't talk, or whisper, I can't stand it!!!!!!!The kids have been hiding out in their bedrooms he is so hateful.But get this, when a co-worker buddy calls or his dad for him to help with something he acts just fine ! But as soon as he comes home, he hits the couch and starts his act again.I don't doubt his pain.But what is he up to? How do you deal with men when they become bears when ill?
2 people like this
11 responses
• United States
3 Sep 07
Sounds like your his comfort zone and he might not feel so comfy venting to his friends or co-workers. Its tough being a wife!! I know after awhile you should be sick of hearing it, but all in all do your best to be supportive and ease the pain for him. Or if all else fails, yell out "I dont want to hear that crap!" lol Ive had to tell my hubby that when he complains about something and he does nothing about it. Also it could possibly be something else bothering him and he doesnt know how to say it, or express himself about it and complaing about his tooth just might be the only way he knows how to feel better. You know how men are so funny about expressing their emotions.
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@tuffy999 (794)
• Philippines
3 Sep 07
basically men have low tolerance with pain. in my case if it gets out of hand his complaining and being cranky i just have a deaf ear, and not mind him at all. i don't lift a finger or do anything for him. i let him deal with his pain by not patronizing him. in due time he will just keep quiet. i don't want to stress myself for his pain wherein i know it will just be temporary.
2 people like this
@jeanena (1616)
• Bucklin, Kansas
2 Sep 07
Men are the worst babies when they are sick or hurting.And there are some that just use it as an excuse to be nasty or mean to everyone around them. Just tell him being sick or hurting isnt right to be mean or hateful to you and the kids.
• United States
2 Sep 07
My husband has a chronic condition and gets sick numerous times a year. I try to be as patient as I can with him (he always apologizes later anyway). If he gets too cranky, bordering on mean, I simply tell him "I realize you're sick and I know you don't feel good, but that's no excuse to take it out on your family. After all, I'm the one taking care of you." That usually reins him in. If it doesn't, I tell him I'm not going to put up with it and then I take a break from him. It doesn't matter if I just go for a walk or go to a friend's house to vent. By the time I come back, he's usually feeling bad about what he said so he apologizes.
@wisedragon (2330)
• Philippines
3 Sep 07
ear pain - despite having illness, men should still respect his family
I know dental pain is one of the worst pains there is, but in this case he behaves normally outside your family. So I think this is a case of him reaching a point that he is already taking you and your children for granted. It's wrong for him to do that. He has an obligation to be a loving husband and father. He should respect all of you in spite of his illness.
1 person likes this
@jothis (519)
• India
3 Sep 07
When somebody fell ill first of all we have to give that person utmost care. Some times as in the case u mentioned we will be in a position what to do next. So try to keep that person happy by your love. It is very useful in the case of children. As this is the case of a man you can give him good medical instruction with the help of a Practitioner.
• China
3 Sep 07
If you still love him and have haven't lose hope ,you can ask a good psychologist to have a talk with him.And the most important thing for you to do is make sure what is his real suppose. Good luck !
1 person likes this
@massaj03 (4376)
• United States
3 Sep 07
Wow! Well first off I would just flat out tell him not to take it out on me..it's not your fault he is in pain. Sure it probably hurts and yes I can see being hateful a bit..but enough is enough...Men can be babies when their sick..I've seen..but a real man (in my opinion) no offense...but a real man would deal with the pain the best he could and not take it out on his wife, girlfriend significant other..or whatever the situation..and especially his children.
1 person likes this
• Canada
2 Sep 07
I have often found that men are more like little children when they are in pain . The best way I have found to deal with it is to just let time pass when they are feeling better and then bring up how hard it is to deal with him when he is sick . More often then not when we are not feeling well we want ohters to know we are in pain but men seem to take it to a whole new level . Best of luck .
1 person likes this
@theprogamer (10539)
• United States
2 Sep 07
Stand up to him and say you aren't putting up with it! I wouldn't!! Either that or get some tylenol nighttime. :)
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• India
3 Sep 07
WE have to take care of them yesterday also we had taken a sick lady from busstand she felt away she was very sick and she was nt having hearing facility and after then we took her to her relation house there she had some food also and then we left away...