Is it possible to love again after heart break?

United States
September 11, 2007 8:16am CST
Is it possible to truly give yourself permission to love after your heart has been broken so badly? Or, do you find that you will always hide part of your heart away so that it can't ever be broken again? As for me, I've found that heart break has made me a weaker and stronger person. At first I feel broken like I will never be mended. But once the initial pain goes away my life opens up in amazing new directions that I could not have imagined before. The pain is always there in the back of my mind, but over time I don't think about it as much. And, then I move on with my life, a wiser person. What do you think? When your heart is broken, do you think that you will always be second guessing yourself and your decisions? Do you think that heart break colors your vision of love, causing you to see love in a different way?
5 people like this
29 responses
@lecanis (16647)
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
11 Sep 07
The way I see it, every person I have loved holds a piece of my heart still. My heart being so infinitely big that there will always be more to give away. =p So when my heart gets broken... I am never the same again. But I neither am I unable to continue, or to love again, because my whole heart cannot belong to one person. Those parts of my heart that are only my own (because of course I must love myself) or that belong to my loved ones from the past will not let me quit, or hide myself away, or become made of stone. Each love leads to the next some way in my life, if I look at it now from the right perspective. Each new journey begins at the end of an old path.
1 person likes this
@theprogamer (10534)
• United States
11 Sep 07
Wow, thats how I feel about it. One person in the past was such an impact on me I think she's got half of my heart. Its okay though, she earned it. As for other previous relationships, after they ended yes I was different. I'm a bit more cautious due to experiences, but I never completely give up hope. Despite how macabre I can sound on the matter. Very poetic and good Lecan!
1 person likes this
@lecanis (16647)
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
12 Sep 07
*nods* I can sound pretty macabre on the matter sometimes too. My life has been pretty messed up, and some of the relationships I've had didn't work out so well because of that. So continually moving forward and always giving love another chance is important to me. =) Thanks for the compliment. =)
@Shaun72 (15959)
• Palatka, Florida
12 Sep 07
I know I am very untrusting since my first marriage and divorce since last year. I am hoping one day I will find a mad that I can trust. I do try to make myself think positive but it's not always easy after getting burned so many times. I am already in my mid 30's but I haven't gave up complete hope.
@Shaun72 (15959)
• Palatka, Florida
12 Sep 07
Oh my gosh I made a few errors in here I meant to say man I can trust.
@RIDGEMOM (28)
• United States
6 Apr 08
well i do think we can love again in time. lost my hubby to cancer last summer and trying top get over this heart break and move on with life. but im scared to love again. then hope you dont kind the kind of man i did who is more scared then i am to love again. it has been bad. but ill be ok and ill move on . good luck
@subha12 (18441)
• India
13 May 08
i think it is possible. but it is not so much easy. when your heart has broken for a time, you reaklly find iyt hard to believe people again. also it makes you reluctant to think that the new person can love you deeply. still many fall in love after they had broken up.
• China
6 Apr 08
It is hard to say,but mostly can not
@ryshawneo (405)
• Philippines
13 May 08
As for me, i haven't experience such thing. Because, i haven't been in love to anyone except my husband, and i think, if he breaks-up with me and ask for a divorce, it would really hurt me and i don't think i can ever love again, Because, he is the only one for me. I can't imagine my life loving someone else but him! :)
@cheenlly (3477)
• Philippines
12 Sep 07
I've been hurt 3 times in my life and after my first broken heart i thought i will not love again because i feel hatred but i was wrong and i feel in love again, thought i was strong and better person then and will not be broken heart again but i was wrong and then i thought that was the last time again but then the same thing happen and now im looking for the real one hope will not be broken heart again and hope this time will be the last time, ONe thing i learned is that those things happen for a purpose perhaps to teach how life it is and how can i be strong learn from those experiences. I need to feel the pain to know the difference for being happy from sad, sweet from bitter and many other things to learn. I believe in right time, the right person will come so be positive and its possible to love again.
@KrisNY (7590)
• United States
14 Sep 07
think it is hard to let yourself open up that much after a heart break. But with time your heart heals itself and you are more trusting again. I do think it takes time though. Hopefully you learn something from the spoiled relationship- whether it be to trust more- love less- open up. I think we constantly learn through life- even with love and relationships. All relationships take work ~ love is hard at times. I have had my heart broken and I have broken hearts- I’m in love again and this time I feel like its it- the one- meant to be. It took me a bit to open up and fully trust again- but time heals everything. And there is no greater feeling than “Love”.
• Philippines
13 Sep 07
For me, it is possible to love again. It is really painful. It is also hard to overcome. AS days passed by, little by little, you will move on and try to live a life without your partner. If you totally forgotten the person, you will forget everything that he or she has done to you. You will recognize if who is wrong between the two of you. When you find somebody to take the place of your previous partner, you, somehow knows what is the real meaning of love, how to love and how to be loved based on your experience.
@laiza14 (593)
• Philippines
22 Mar 08
it depends on the person, but most probably, in most situations. yes it is possible.
@gr8life (6251)
• Malaysia
12 Sep 07
Hello beautyqueen, People say it is hard to forget the first love. But for me, it is different. I had my first love and it broke my heart. I felt like I will never fall in love again. It is hard to trust other people instead of myself. I have been thinking that I will never forget my first love. Amazing thing happened when I got to know my husband. I have been thinking I had found my true love before and when he broke my heart, my life has been destroyed forever. But after knowing my husband, I feel that I love him more than my first love. He made me forget all the sad pasts and I don't even want to remember my love life before meeting him. For me, my truly love is him and will always be him. In my life now, he is my first love!
• India
12 Sep 07
yes..i saw many of my frnds..but u i feel tats not there love.
• Philippines
13 Sep 07
Love and hurt is entwined,..for a lot would say you will never know what love is not unless you know the feelings of being hurt!!!?what's good about it is you were able to see new directions,..that you should be thankful,you see the reason why it happened?simply because everything happens for a purpose...
@Reyah23 (640)
• Philippines
22 Mar 08
The only way to mend a broken heart is to love again. But if you decided to enter into a new relationship, you must think all your past error and learn how to correct it so it wont be happen again. Healing takes time but you be a better person when you start to love again.
@subha12 (18441)
• India
12 Sep 07
It varies from person to person. Also on the situation I believe. It hurts when you really love that person. But When that person you loved or thought is so faithful to you, just chaets you, its very difficult to love again . I think its the case atleast would be for me. I can't ever believe that person himself. Or i'll also not be able to believe any one in future.
@lucky_witch (2707)
• Philippines
12 Sep 07
Yes it is possible to love again. If you consider heartache not only as painful experience but part of growing up and learning experince... and if you accept separation as a part of relationship that could not continue anymore then it would be easier for you to open yourself for a new chance in relationship. All the pain that you will feel the moment that you loose your someone special will eventualy vanish especially if you have given your best in your relationship with him. It would be easier to accept taht you are not just meant for each other and somehow someone you deserve will come along better than you expected. You are right that you will be wiser the momenta that you move on with your life, it is because you already know the do's and dont's in relationship so that it will last longer. I have been in a few relationship in my life when I was younger. And every heartache that ive felt during that time, fade away...and now I understand why I lost certain love stories in my life. I can say that those past relationship in my life have greater affect in what I am today. And I can say that they have great contribution in what I am today. The moment you say goodbye to someone then just be thankful that...that special person came and has been a special part of your life.:) I hope in some ways.. I have contributed in this very nice topic. Happy posting!
@singlepixel (2743)
12 Sep 07
everything you've stated there is right as far as I'm concerned. the only things I'd like to add is that after a heart break, we become more careful, a little reserved when it comes to romance and may be even more romantic than before..awww.!.;)
@khazeemee (288)
• Philippines
12 Sep 07
why not? a heart broken can always be mend, and moving on with your life is another way of gainig strength.. and to fall in love again might also a help to re-gain your confidence to open your heart again..
@ssf12ster (488)
• India
12 Sep 07
ou are so heart broken and you try to do the same thing agin and you are notsure it will work again. so where is the question of doing it againg my dear friend.no repairs will redo such damage dear.broken is broken.one way is to look before you leap!
@hv1peer (113)
• Netherlands
12 Sep 07
Yes it's possible, only if you really want to.