Who initiates the 'talk' when couples fight?

We most definitely have something in common Flight. I am very stubborn too and my husband is mellow and calming and knows how to calm me down quickly. He too hardly ever gets angry.

If my hubby does get mad, he usually doesn't act much different. I mean, he doesn't talk as much, but he's not mean or hateful. He is a seriously chill guy.:) He's the best though. Ha ha. He knows not to try my temper anyway.:P Laydee, I have to say that your awesome because you ask questions in your responses back to us. I think that's great because it keeps a conversation going and it opens it up to new ideas sometimes. It's great.:)

God really does things to match people, doesn't He? *LOL* Rarely do I hear a couple who is both hot headed. There is always someone who is more mellow than the other. *LOL* But what happens if he himself is mad? Do you initiate though when that happens? or does he cool down first then initiate the talk still? Thanks for sharing =)

To be honest he hardly ever gets angry and when he does, I let him be. I completely ignore him and let him do whatever he needs to do to get over it, and then we come together and talk about it again. I have on a few occasions initated it and apologised because I am the one that has made him angry.

Oh that's good, at least the communication is still open regardless what. How long have you been married? Indeed the time spent together is very important to know the person deep, thus enabling you to know what to do in these situations. Thanks! =)

I'm really learning a lot in this topic. I too am like you, I am stubborn. *LOL* It's a good way that your partner knows you well enough to know you need to let it all out, and he's so calm about it. That's a great quality in a marriage. But what happens if he's angry? What happens?

Sometimes in life we really get burned-out with repeating talks and arguments with no obvious effects on some people. I do feel that way at times when no matter what I say, it seems like nobody is listening or my partner just keeps doing that things I don't really like (regardless how many times I told him how I feel about it). It's just really better at times to keep silent and let the other deal with it. But oh well, we can't keep silent forever. Thank you very much for sharing your thoughts. I hope someday you'll have a revived spirit and relieved yourself with stress. Good luck and have a great time in myLot. =)

A mother with 3 kids is not easy. I am sorry that I can't do anything to help except showing my sympathy. I have one kid and the annoying thing she alone can bring is under my max patience. I am not sure whethe I am still ok if I have three kids. Thinking more about the happiness the kids can bring may alleviate your pain. Anyway, the kids finally will grow up and at that time you you will be very proud that you are a mother of three.

I couldn't agree more. We too don't want to sleep on a problem. Yeah, it's not such a good feeling if it's late and you both are not settled yet. It's good though that you try to do the talking. Is that regardless who is wrong? or is it if you are at fault that you initiate? Thanks for the sharing. =)

I am guessing you are the girl. What happens if the boy doesn't initiate though?

Yeah, I think that's the best way there is. I don't mean to grapevine but why do you think the first relationship didn't last? What are the valuable lessons you've learned for yourself from the old flame to help you with the new love? Thanks.

His parents hated me and I guess he was afraid they'd stop paying for college or kick him out or not do anything for him anymore. I don't know really, but every time he talks to me it's I love you I miss you and all that stuff. It took me forever to finally get over it and it's just hard to have him do that to me.