new neighbors, should i warn them?

@roniroxas (10576)
Philippines
September 16, 2007 10:09pm CST
almost two months ago the door next to our house was vacant and finally last saturday we had a new neighbor. our landlord has a son (who is gay). they also have a house in the country so every once in a while they are here at the city. this gay son of out landlord loves to drink. and when he gets drunk and needs to buy more booze he knocks on tenants door to borrow money. no! he has no work so even he promises to pay it will be for a long waiting before he does. it is okay if he borrows money as long as it will be for emergency reasons.... but for his vices only it is really very irritating. whats more irritating is he is drunk when he borrows money so it is really kinda scarry. our new neighbors are quiet or maybe they are still trying to adjust, i just really want to warn them about this. he sometimes knocks at the door in the middle of the night and say that it is okay not to pay for the months rent as long as you will lend him some money. i borrowed him twice maybe or trice but one time i got really angry and told him that he has to work if he wants to have money for his vices. from then on he stops bugging me. is it okay to warn them or let them find out by themselves?
9 people like this
25 responses
@cyntrow (8524)
• United States
17 Sep 07
warning the new neighbors would be fine and understandable. I just wonder why you had to state in this post that he was gay. Gay or straight, he is a problem. He needs to solve his own problems. But his sexuality has nothing to do with that. That part did not need to be stated.
2 people like this
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
17 Sep 07
well i did not stated that he is a gay because i am against gays, no im not. i have a lot of gay friends and they are all responsible. i stated that he is a gay because gay people are friendly and he is using that friendly side of him to have a reason to knock and borrow money.
1 person likes this
@cyntrow (8524)
• United States
17 Sep 07
Hon, not all gay people are friendly. I've come across a number of swindlers who are straight. Pardon my offense. Gay men and women would prefer not to be labeled. Sexuality and honesty are not the same thing. His sexuality did not need to be mentioned. I'm sorry if this sounds nasty. i don't mean for it to sound as such. I have a number of gay family members and friends. If their sexuality does not pertain to the post, it doesn't need to be mentioned.
2 people like this
@DJ9020 (1596)
• United States
17 Sep 07
Now, I'm not sure what being gay has to do with anything, but this guy is clearly a jerk. Yes, I would warn the neighbors about his mooching ways, but I don't think his being gay has anything to do with it.
2 people like this
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
17 Sep 07
i didnt say anything against him being gay, i am trying to explain what he is like. most of gay people are friendly and i have a lot of gay friends. but he being friendly leads him the authority to knock at tenats door for he knows he has build a friend relationship already
• United States
17 Sep 07
I would let them know. I know I would want to know about it before he came knocking on my door. Have you told your landlord. This is unacceptable behavior and should be taken care of!
1 person likes this
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
18 Sep 07
yes they know it but the taken part part is not easy they are too old already for them to control it. thanks for the response
• United States
17 Sep 07
I would deff tell his dad what hes been doing..no one should be living in any fear..especially the landlords son..and deff warn the other tenants..i dont knwo why you havent done anything about this..its not legal and they cant kick you out for it..just call the father and talk to him..and that doesnt help call the police if u have too..thats just wrong that ur goin threw this..i wish u lots of luck and the new tenants,,have a good one!
1 person likes this
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
18 Sep 07
the parents knows about this.... and almost all the tenants here left with that reason, specially those who cant standup for their rights. he is not bugging me anymore but still doing that to the other neighbors. i had opened this situation to the parents already but all they say is just dont lend him money. the parents are really old already and (maybe) to weak to control their own son. thanks for the response
@cefaz_21 (2597)
• Philippines
17 Sep 07
Hi! I think,since they are new,they might thought you are just making an issue about your neighboor and don't expect them to believe you right away, but I suggest do what your heart tells you toodo, if you feel you really need to warn them about the son,tell them at least you did your part as a good neighboor. :) I just hope your tenant's son get his self up and make a life..:)
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
18 Sep 07
thanks for the advice. though my heart and my mind is having second thoughts about this thats why i started the discussion. we are living here for 4 years now and this tenants son has a rotten life a lot of years ago. i think he has this psychological problem because all of his siblings are achievers he is the only one who has a lifel ike this. thanks for the response
@aseretdd (13736)
• Philippines
17 Sep 07
Your landlord's son is quite a pain... have you talked to your landlord about his son's habit of bothering you at night to borrow money? If not, then you should... with regards to warning your new neighbor... if you warn them the first or second time you meet them, it would seem like it is gossip... If they ask you first about people in the neighborhood, then that is the time when you can warn them because it did not start from you...
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
17 Sep 07
they know about it and all they say is dont borrow him money. my landlord and landlady are old couples already and i think they are not that strong to control the attitude of their son. so we are all peaceful here whenever their son is in the country. thanks for the response. that is also one of the reason why a have second thoughts if i have to tell them or not because they might not take it as a concern but they mightt hink it was a gossip.
• United States
17 Sep 07
If I was new I would want to know something like that. Just introduce yourself and let them know about this guy. Then they wont be freaked out in the middle of the night.
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
17 Sep 07
exactly what i was thinking. i just knew now that the father is going to leave soon for he works abroad, and i really need to warn them. thanks for the response
@meholl (510)
• United States
17 Sep 07
I would get a nice housewarming cake or something for your neighbors, and take it over. Then I would share that little bit of info with them, in the spirit of sharing neighborhood information.
1 person likes this
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
17 Sep 07
that a nice idea. thanks for that.
@ctrymuziklvr (11059)
• United States
17 Sep 07
I would let them know...in passing about the son. I don't think it would be good make it seem like gossip.
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
17 Sep 07
its not a gossip it is true, the last tenant who left 2 months ago left because she was so afraid of him knocking at the door and is drunk. she lives alone for her husband works abroad. thanks for the response it is making me think clearly that i need to tell it to them
@stella1989 (2274)
• India
17 Sep 07
Well being a good neighbour you should warn them!! As they are new at this place and you can always help them to adjust at this new place. There is no harm in warning them about this gay guy infact I should call it "inform them" rather then "warn" then cause this will project a negative aspect of yours, just let them know it casually that how the son of the landlord behaves, atleast they can get prepared for one..!! :)
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
18 Sep 07
hey stella that was a good advice there. that i should not call it as a warning but i should advice them. thank you very much. a BR for you
1 person likes this
• India
19 Sep 07
thanx!!
@kelly60 (4548)
• United States
17 Sep 07
I think that if it were me I would discuss it with my landlord if his son were bothering me in the middle of the night to borrow money. I don't think that going to the new neighbors would probably help though and they would probably just think that you liked to gossip. As long as he is only annoying and not harmful, I don't think that I would tell them unless they asked about neighbors.
@jHoEn16 (2043)
• Australia
17 Sep 07
i agree! the only thing that can stop him of doing that was his dad!
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
18 Sep 07
the landlords knows all about his son that is why he is better in the country than here in the city but still he sometimes comes with his parents when they are here or sometimes manage to go here without the parents knowing it. for jhoen, lokaloka si bayot un si cris, you know him.
@dopey22girl (3324)
• United States
21 Sep 07
I would warn them about this...but I have to ask something. Why did you feel the need to mention twice that this guy is gay? That has nothing to do with the question you are asking, so why bring it up? Do you feel there is something wrong with being gay? I'm not trying to cause a problem here, but I think it is completely unrelated to the problem you are mentioning.
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
21 Sep 07
i dont have anything against a person who is gay. i have a lot of friends who are gay too. i specified he was gay because he makes friends first, and as we know them they are easily to be liked because they are fun to be with. now when he thinks you are friends already this makes an excuse to knock and borrow money.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
20 Sep 07
Hi there, what's been up to lately buddy? Well, as i concern neighbor we should warn them and tell them what they should be aware of. As a good neighbor, we have to let them know some things in regards of the community, if they haven't know it yet. And as a good neighbor, we should not talk about our other neighbors lives, we shouldn't mind their lives, just mind our own business. Have a nice day ahead and happy posting and earning here in mylot. Godspeed, Kiko
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
20 Sep 07
hi kiko. thanks for the advice. i havent said a word yet and the landlords son is not around. he is at the country right now. i just hope he stays there so he wont be bugging the new tenants.
@beaniegdi (1966)
19 Sep 07
That is a really bad situation. Maybe he won't go to the new tenants so why not wait and see if he does. You could warn them and he may not go to them and then they will be worried about it for no reason.
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
19 Sep 07
wow what a goodpoint you have there. the landlord's son is in the country right now and he havent seen the new tenants yet. thanks for the advice. a + rate for you beaniegdi
@archer1811 (1099)
• Philippines
18 Sep 07
It is not wrong to warn your neighbor, and after all his decision may vary in his own opinion too. At least on your part you did what you think is right and you make him aware. Its really irritating when someone knocks on your door just to borrow money to you and spend on his vices, its like your supporting him to make him sick.
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
19 Sep 07
it is really irritating, specially when you think it was important then you will realize that it was not.
@jamie11982 (1659)
• United States
18 Sep 07
I would worn them but i would also have a nice long conversation with this man's parents eg your landlord. I would also start recording the amount on a sheet of paper in a book and make him sign by that amount everytime that he barrows money and then show the land lord. Good luck. I hope this advice works out for you.
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
19 Sep 07
i dont need to write anything for he is not bugging me anymore... and i hope no more bugging in the future. sometimes when people gets desperate they try again, but i wish not. thanks for the response
@ranitam22 (1147)
• United States
18 Sep 07
I definitely think you should warn them, especially if he is coming to people's homes in the middle of the night. that is different. Have you told your landlord about this? What does he have to say? He should definitely be involved and know what is going on because that is not cool to be bumming money off of basically perfect strangers who just happen to be renting from his dad. That has to be put to a stop.
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
19 Sep 07
they know it, and if their son borrowed money they are the one who pays for it. its really a burden for them because they are too old already, i pity them. thanks for the response
@ian1010 (459)
• Philippines
17 Sep 07
yes.,for me you should warn them.,it's a good thing they know about it., it's just my opinion, thank you
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
19 Sep 07
and your opinion is appreciated, thanks for the response ian
@Pose123 (21667)
• Canada
17 Sep 07
Hi roniroxas, First of all his sexuality has nothing to do with it. You should probably warn the new neighbours about his other activities, but I wouldn't mention that he is gay. That has nothing to do with the problem. Blessings.
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
18 Sep 07
thanks for the advice, i mentioned that he was gay because gays are really friendly. he is freindly i can say that when he is not drunk he looks like a good guy. but he make a point to be friendly so he has the reason to borrow money. thaks for the response
@dreamy1 (3815)
• United States
17 Sep 07
If it were me I wouldn't say anything. That certainly wouldn't be the first thing that I would say to someone just moving in. Maybe he won't know on their door, who knows. I would talk to the dad about the son's behavior not the neighbors. It's not their business so why tell them. Maybe you think the same might happen to them but might not. I think if that's the first thing you tell them they will definitely think you are a gossip. If it happened to you and he comes knocking on the door drunk in the middle of the night call the police.
@roniroxas (10576)
• Philippines
18 Sep 07
well the police always comes late if they come at all.... lol that is what tracy chapman say. thanks for the advice dreamy.