What is the worst relationship you have ever been involved in?

Relationships - Hearts
United States
September 17, 2007 9:22am CST
Mine is a toss up between my ex and my sister. My sister is 2 years younger and we never got along a day in our lives...even as kids. We are now 60 years old (she is 58!)and we still don't even communicate. She lives in PA and I live in MA. As for my ex...well that was a 5 year mistake...lol. I think he was fighting it all along but I wouldn't see it because I was so in love with him. They do say love is blind don't they? I'm living proof. Obviously it ended up bad and we've gone our seperate ways but I still do love him even after almost 2 years. What would you consider to be your worst relationship? Was it a romantic involvement or a family thing? How did/do you deal with it?
5 people like this
15 responses
@lecanis (16647)
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
17 Sep 07
I'd say my relationship with any of my family members is worse than any romantic relationship I've been in. That's saying a lot actually, because I've actually been in a couple of really messed up romantic relationships. However, my relationships with my family win over romantic ones because they've gone on longer, and continue to cause me pain to this day. And no matter how many times I try to just cut all my ties to them, I haven't quite managed it. My relationship with my grandmother is perhaps the most messed up one I can think of. I lived with her a lot as a child, so really she's more a parent figure to me than my parents. She hated me from the start. There were many reasons she hated me, but I think it was largely because she didn't really want to take care of me. I can understand that to an extent, but taking it out on a child isn't fair. Not only that, but her husband sexually abused me, and she ignored it, no matter how many times I tried to get her to stop him. She constantly told me how fat and ugly I was, how no one was ever going to love me, how I was going to hell, how I was a race-traitor, etc, etc, etc. She'd kick me out of her home periodically and then insist I ran away, or beat me and then claim it was my fault for not living up to her expectations. Yeah, that's definitely the worst relationship ever for me. I really, really wish I could just never talk to this woman, but the fact that she started being kind to my father a few years ago keeps me in touch with her. That's a whole other story though, and I think I've ranted too much already.
2 people like this
• United States
17 Sep 07
I find it amazing how many people have such big problem with family members. I would think those relationships would be the best.
2 people like this
@lecanis (16647)
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
17 Sep 07
It's funny how differently we look at things. I am always surprised to hear about people who have "good families" because mine was so horrible and abusive towards me. I am determined to make MY family (myself, my husband, my son) one of those good ones. =)
2 people like this
@vicki2876 (5636)
• Canada
17 Sep 07
Mine was my mother. She was a socialpath and had very serious mental health issues. She refused to get herself treatment. It is very difficult when you love someone so much that just doesn't have the ability to love you back. I left her home when I was sixteen but still kept contact hoping I could still try to help her. I eventually had to end all contact with her 4 years ago because her mental health was getting worse and she was harming my childern. It was so hard to let her go but I had to for my childern's sake.
2 people like this
@vicki2876 (5636)
• Canada
17 Sep 07
PS it is so sad that your relationship with your sister isn't good. My sister is 2 years older than me and 2000 km away but is my best friend and we talk every day. That wasn't the case when we were kids though HEHE.
1 person likes this
• United States
17 Sep 07
The worst relationship I've ever been in was with an ex boyfriend who was about 9 years older than me. This was about 5,6 years ago. I fell in love with him and I thought he loved me too but he really didn't. He played games with my mind and toyed with my emotions. He really did not care whether he hurt me or not. He would break up with me, and stupid me would take him back every time until I got so fed up with everything that I decided to end things with him once and for all. I cut all ties with him and I was so much happier as a result. I now realize that he probably did love me to the best of his ability, but he was afraid of commitment. FYI- he is still single with no commitment, while I am in a committed, happy, loving relationship. And I am thankful for having let go of that loser. :)
2 people like this
@naty1941 (2336)
• United States
17 Sep 07
My second husband. He turned out to be demanding, verbally abusive and lazy. After two years I divorced him. He would not communicate in a logical fashion and was always very angry and depressed.
2 people like this
• United States
17 Sep 07
I have a feeling you didn't even have to think long about that one. I can see why you feel that way.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
17 Sep 07
My worst relationship would be that with my brother. There are times we could get along but most of the time we couldn't get near each other. Right now, we are in the worst situation ever. He keeps treating people like they are inferior to him. I cannot tolerate this kind of behavior so I am sorry I will really fight for what is right. He cannot accept this because he wants to control everything which he cannot do with me. We had a huge fight after this. I cannot bring myself to give in to his democratic ways. I guess we will never get along with each other. I do not wish to do so, not unless he will learn to change his ways. We will just wait for that time.
• United States
17 Sep 07
lol...your brother sounds much like my sister. She has to control everyone and everything. I've never been able to find it in myself to let her do that to me even though other family members have. I don't like to see anyone who is wrong win.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
18 Sep 07
same thing with me..it was my worst relationship ever but still hanging on still..yes love is blind and only we can say its over when we fall out of love..i am 5 years older than my sister but we had manage things well..we are still communicating and she was living with me..my bf had come between us and they had the thing for a year on my back..but i love the man i can set that aside and live like nothing happened..
2 people like this
@cefaz_21 (2596)
• Philippines
18 Sep 07
I'm grateful that the worst relationship I've been involve to is not family matter, we have had our shares of difficulties but not realy worse. The worst I've been to was a 5 year relationship with an ex, learning that he cheated me even on our first month together..I hoped he would change, I hoped we would eventually get married but to no avail,he kept on cheating me through all those years and I just gave up.. Broken,shattered,hopeless..but I move on..:) And now I'm happy and couldn't be happier with the man that God agve me.
1 person likes this
@cefaz_21 (2596)
• Philippines
31 Oct 07
thank you for the BR..jujst letting you kow that it is very much appreciated.. blessings!
@worldwise1 (14885)
• United States
17 Sep 07
Well, I must say, ctry, that my worst relationships sort of mirror yours-an ex and a sister, lol. My ex and I were together for twenty years, and although we have been broken up for almost six years, he still doesn't realize it. I am such a softy that when he appears at my door I always let him in. He was good to me, but there were substance abuse problems. Now I sort of like the arrangement because I have the freedom to live life on my own terms and occasionally enjoy his company. When he starts to get on my nerves I just tell him it's time to go. My sister is another story. She has always been difficult, and I thought that with the passing of our oldest sister last September we could become closer. That has not happened. I am 61 and she just turned 64 and is stubborn as ever. I even thought that when our mother passed back in February it might bring us closer, but, sadly, it has not.
@maiax2k6 (535)
• Philippines
18 Sep 07
i would say mine would be with my ex. it wasn't off with a good start when we went dating, i should have taken the hint on that. but when we went seriously going out, it was the loveliest of all times, until we got married on the wrong foot again being both unstable financially. we were in for a rough ride. i was pretty sure the love was there though and was good while it lasted. but there came a time when the main spring snaps and every little thread that went with the bond was broken, as far as i was concerned. i'm sorry that it happened because that time we had three sweet little kids. but i think tht it was long overdue and that it was bound to happen. to be fair i think we both had contributed to the problem, and it was good that i acknowledged and realized that everything was not okay and will never be okay if we went on with the union. so, no regrets, we have to make mistakes to correct ourselves, that i know now.
1 person likes this
@maiax2k6 (535)
• Philippines
18 Sep 07
i would say mine would be with my ex. it wasn't off with a good start when we went dating, i should have taken the hint on that. but when we went seriously going out, it was the loveliest of all times, until we got married on the wrong foot again being both unstable financially. we were in for a rough ride. i was pretty sure the love was there though and was good while it lasted. but there came a time when the main spring snaps and every little thread that went with the bond was broken, as far as i was concerned. i'm sorry that it happened because that time we had three sweet little kids. but i think tht it was long overdue and that it was bound to happen. to be fair i think we both had contributed to the problem, and it was good that i acknowledged and realized that everything was not okay and will never be okay if we went on with the union. so, no regrets, we have to make mistakes to correct ourselves, that i know, now.
1 person likes this
@jatamogue (367)
• Philippines
17 Sep 07
My relationships are far less significant to what you have gone through. I wouldn't know more than you. My relationships are ones that have to grow and start. I guess being true to myself and to people I love will be a start? It is hard to give oneself to a relationship with tons of risks. Just thinking of them, it makes me feel cold and uncertain even about the next day. I guess those are how relationships go on. I think the worst relationship I could go through with are those that meant nothing to me because it makes those relationships grow worse with deep hatred when they do... Family will always be first. I believe that how you treat your family is how you may treat others in the long run.
@arwd997 (25)
• United States
18 Sep 07
Wow What a good question. I do not talk to most of my relatives because they are fake and stuck-up. They caused me much pain and heartache. My worst relationship was with my youngest daughter's dad. He ripped up my self esteem, caused me to be diagnosed with anxiety and put me through loads of emotional abuse. I stayed two years because I felt I eas too old to be a burden on my parents. He isolated me from my dad and I found out he had a heart attack. So, I left my ex and now live with my dad until I graduate to become a legal sssistant. I am still going through some reprecussions, but my life and kids are happier and I will never let a man ruin my life again.
1 person likes this
@arwd997 (25)
• United States
18 Sep 07
Wow What a good question. I do not talk to most of my relatives because they are fake and stuck-up. They caused me much pain and heartache. My worst relationship was with my youngest daughter's dad. He ripped up my self esteem, caused me to be diagnosed with anxiety and put me through loads of emotional abuse. I stayed two years because I felt I eas too old to be a burden on my parents. He isolated me from my dad and I found out he had a heart attack. So, I left my ex and now live with my dad until I graduate to become a legal sssistant. I am still going through some reprecussions, but my life and kids are happier andI will never let a man run my life again.
• Canada
18 Sep 07
my worst relationship would be the marriage i am trying to end. I left it a little over 3 months ago because he decided he should be able to do whatever he wants including becoming physically abusive. He obviously thought i would stay, guess he doesn't know me as well as he thought. Even now he is fighting the divorce proceedings, refusing to sign the papers or be served.
1 person likes this
@theprogamer (10534)
• United States
17 Sep 07
Any of the dating ones from the late 90s to about a year ago. I've been through a nice couple dozen harpies and every relationship with them sucked. There were times I was used and a lot of times I was abused. I've seen the whole assortment of harpy serpents too. Golddiggers, nags, empty headed clowns, shallow divers, cheaters, liars, mindgamers, hypocrites (I know I'm missing a ton, but I'm not enraged yet so I'm having trouble recalling it all) Sad part is a few of them were some pretty good pretenders, and I had to really observe to spot who they really were. Others, it only took a little time to see they serpent for what it was. How'd I deal with it. At first I was docile and wasn't as resistant but that's changed in recent times. I also deal with it by vilifying the harpies for who they are any chance I get. And even better, I live how I want to and I've made even larger endeavors toward making myself a superior grade person. I've even turned my relationship standards a whole 180. I don't seek out the opposite gender like society wants, the opposite gender has to prove itself worthy of my time. I'm not just worth it, I'm damn worth it. And ever since changes like that, I've been feeling beyond great. I even coined 120% due to these changes, my vastly strong work ethic, and my focus toward hobbies. It just gets better from here too.
1 person likes this