How many children yo have and why?

@aaidjs (1149)
Croatia (Hrvatska)
October 15, 2007 10:56pm CST
Hello,my youngest grandson is in first class of elementary school and I drive him every morning in school.There I meet a young pregnant women .Her son is in same class like my grandson and we sometimes talk about children,family,money,expencive life and etc.She told me that she has 6 children and the 7th is on the way!!She also told me that her husband don't have a job and she try to make some money on Internet!!She ask if I can help you and I give her my hubby's old computer!!After that I saw her in front of our Caritas house where I try to help!!I tell you this story because I am surprise ,and I can not understand that someone without any money,with no job and regular paycheck can be so stupid to have 6 children!!I think that we have to be in position to bring to the world our children!!Why people in the poor country have so many children?I have 5,but my hubby have a very good job,and my family have a good private business for long time!!I am sure that parents have to give all for children.,Children need lot of money such as a lot of love!!What is your opinion ?Regards Silvana
1 person likes this
15 responses
@Ravenladyj (22937)
• United States
16 Oct 07
I have 3 children but only two living (my youngest passed away some yrs ago)..but if ALL of my pregnancies would have been successful I'd have 6 kids LOL which is what I wanted :-( Unfortunately though I had two miscarriages (first and fourth pregs)and had to have an abortion for the 6th pregnancy
2 people like this
@aaidjs (1149)
• Croatia (Hrvatska)
17 Oct 07
Hello Dear!!Its not easy when you lost your children,that is not fer at all!!We have to believe in Gods Way!!With all my Love Silvana
• India
16 Oct 07
i have two kids and i am happy about the fact.i cannot take care of anymore so i did my family planning too.they take up most of my time and i love giving them as much as i can.
@aaidjs (1149)
• Croatia (Hrvatska)
17 Oct 07
Thank for your respond!!Regards Silvana
@drannhh (15241)
• United States
16 Oct 07
I have no children for a number of reasons. First, when I was of child-bearing age, my husband and I did not have the financial means we though necessary to properly educate and raise even one child. Both teachers, we also took care of other people's children all day long and usually well into the evenings. After seeing young people misbehaving all day long, we probably would have been overly strict with our own. Another reason was that we both had pretty clueless parents and did not want to take any chance of making the same mistakes our parents made. We agreed before marrying that rushing into parenthood was one thing we would never do. When in doubt, wait, we reasoned, and we have never regretted our choice and never will. It is possible to like children without having to have one's own.
2 people like this
@aaidjs (1149)
• Croatia (Hrvatska)
16 Oct 07
Thank you for this words!!I can fill your love foe children!!Thanks again Silvana
1 person likes this
• Canada
18 Oct 07
Oh my do I ever appreciate hearing your strong voice on this issue. It is of great concern to me about how people increase our overly-populated world without any sense of responsibility to that or the quality of life of their children. I frequently state my deep respect for parents...who understand how important child-rearing is. After all those of you who choose to bring babies into the world and raise them are preparing them to become the planetary citizens of the future...quite daunting indeed! My husband and I are at the other end of the bell curve and decided not have children of our own for a number of reasons. The first one is the nature of our work and the lifestyle we lead. We are group leaders, life coaches and public speakers. My husband is a computer specialist and I write professionally. We love our work because of the unstructured lifestyle we lead. However, the very thing we love about would interfere with our ability to provide a stable, structured family life and be present to the child and its needs. Having said that we work with kids and have been involved with the Big Brother/Big Sister organization and have mentored children. So whether a person decides to have children or not...I absolutely agree with your perspective about putting their health and well-being as the first consideraton and how well that can be maintained throughout life. Good discussion...we need more of them so people can become more accountable for the cause and effect of their choices...and hopefully THINK AHEAD!!!! Raia
1 person likes this
@aaidjs (1149)
• Croatia (Hrvatska)
18 Oct 07
Thank you very much for this words and sentence!!You are a valuable member for mylot!!You have good knowledge of English language and you understand a problem!!I can not express my filing and my thoughts because of restriction knowledge of English.Yesterday I saw your web site,and I it is a very good and professional site!I am a little afraid to be in same discussion with you!!Can you understand my point...!I marked your response as a the best on this matter!!Thank you very much again and be nice when You judge my language!Whit all my respect Silvana
1 person likes this
• Canada
19 Oct 07
Hello again... Thank you immensely for your best response, checking out my homepage...and for your generous words about my writing skills. All writers love to know how their work is being received because we do not have bosses and co-workers to interact with. We are in our workspace staring at a screen, putting ideas out there and always wondering how others are receiving them. So my new friend...you hit the mark on all of the above for me and I appreciate it! Please do not compare yourself to me or anyone else here because it is clear to me that you are a thoughtful woman, with much insight, life experience and knowing. Your ideas come across clearly and are presented well in an understandable way...so keep on putting them out there and others will come. Many members are always on the lookout for interesting discussions and you are providing that on your site. So I hope my honest feedback from you will encourage you to keep on posting and chatting...you are doing a good job and are already an asset to the site. Warmes regards, Raia
@paulsy (1264)
• Philippines
17 Oct 07
Yes, I do agree with you. The moment we have children, it is our responsiblity to make sure we can provide for their needs. I have three children. As parents, we do our best to give them what they need. It isn't easy, but they never asked to be born, did they? We chose to have them, and so we are responsible for them. That would be until they are old enough to provide for their own selves.
1 person likes this
@aaidjs (1149)
• Croatia (Hrvatska)
17 Oct 07
Hello, I always say to all that we chose to have children and we have to provide them as more as we can !Regards Silvana
@foxygirle (377)
• Philippines
17 Oct 07
I have one daughter, she is 5 years old. I still wish to add one more but sometime due to high cost of raising a child, we are still contemplating if we really want to add one more. Though we are not poor, sometimes thinking about the expenses in raising a child is becoming a challenge especially if you are not earning that much. Yes, i agree with you children needs lots of money and lots of love. I still can't understand people having lots of children and not being able to provide for their basic needs. Its hard to see children suffering from basic needs not to mention that they also have some childish wants that you have to give in from time to time.
@aaidjs (1149)
• Croatia (Hrvatska)
17 Oct 07
Hello, we have the same opinion about this problem!!Regards Silvana
@meilina (78)
• China
17 Oct 07
I have no children yet, but I think I will have one at least in the future. Two years ago, I almost had a child but I gave up. I've regretted for my decision for a long time. Nevertheless, raising a child needs lots of care, financially and spiritualy. And at that time my circumstance made me come up short as a mother, which was unfair to my child. I hope I can give more than expected to my future child!
@aaidjs (1149)
• Croatia (Hrvatska)
17 Oct 07
Thanks for your participation!!!Regards Silvana
@meanangel (167)
• United States
16 Oct 07
Yes you should have the money to raise children before having a house full but you can not judge a person by the number of children they have. You have to consider the persons personal and religious beliefs. Take for example Catholics do not believe in birth control they believe it is Gods will to get pregnant or not and to mess with reproduction is a sin. The bottom line is we don't know what is in a persons mind until we have walked a mile in their shoes. Be kind to all even when they don't practice the same belief's as your own and this world would be a better place. I am done preaching now. For myself one child is enough. That way I get to spend more time with her and not spread myself to thin.
1 person likes this
@aaidjs (1149)
• Croatia (Hrvatska)
17 Oct 07
Yes,you have a good point!!Who am I to judge others!!Regards Silvana
@devilangelo (4525)
• India
16 Oct 07
well i dont have any children yet . coz i aint married yet .. but wen i do get married . i plan to have 3 children :D .not that small . but not that big either .. just perfect :D
@aaidjs (1149)
• Croatia (Hrvatska)
17 Oct 07
Hello,very nice plan for your future!!Regards Silvana
@youless (94757)
• Guangzhou, China
16 Oct 07
I have only one child and he is three years old now. Actually I hope to have two children but it is difficult because my country doesn't allow it. This law doesn't make a sense.
@aaidjs (1149)
• Croatia (Hrvatska)
17 Oct 07
Hello dear!!I am sure that it is hard for you when your government tell you how many children you will have!!Regards Silvana
@Savvynlady (3686)
• United States
16 Oct 07
I am the mother of two daughters ages 15 and 17. The 17 year old is a senior in high school here and a bit undecided as to what to do. The 15 year old one will be sixteen next month, and knows moreso what she wants, as a matter of fact, before she even started high school, she was stressing on what college to attend! I also have two stepdaughters ages 6 and 10 that are a result of my ex husband's remarriage. The youngest is a smart little one, and I have been hoping that she gets the right opportunities when the time comes.
@aaidjs (1149)
• Croatia (Hrvatska)
17 Oct 07
Thanks for your respond!Regards Silvana
@archer1811 (1099)
• Philippines
17 Oct 07
I agree with you. There are number of married couples in our country that bring so many children into this world without thinking of what the future they can give to their children, they maybe just want to satisfy their own needs not knowing that a minute of happinness they felt would probably bring a big responsibilities for them. And we notice that those who are jobless parents are the most numbers of children have than those parents who are a working parents. I am married for almost 8 years now and we only have 1 son, we are planning to have a new baby soon if God permits, we plan for the future of our son and our family that's why we are tryin our best to give our son the best love as we can be, giving him the healthy life that every child must have and most of all we plan for the number of children that we have to bring into this world to make sure of their future.
• Bangladesh
17 Oct 07
I have 4 children, three daughters and one son. two pairs, 12 years and 8 yrs old daughters playing together and 3 yrs boy and 1 year daughter playing together. these two doing very interesting things all the day, making laugh, etc. we enjoy their activities all the day. really happy family. without these pairs its never be happened, I think.
@bobbyjoe143 (1287)
16 Oct 07
personally i believe that love is more important than money where children are concerned. there are many parents out there, that may have good jobs and only one or 2 children, but don't treat them right or love them... and then there are parents that have many children that they love and care for to the best of their abilities, but don';t have much money. be honest now, which household would you prefer to grow up in? my paternal grandmother had 6 children, there was pleanty of money coming into the house as my grandfather had a good job, but they were cruel parents and my father had a traumatic upbringing. my maternal grandmother (nanna) had 14 children (yes that's right fourteen!) there was not a great deal of many things in my mums house when she was growing up, she always had lothes on her back, shooes on her feet and food in her stomach, but possessions were limited... one thing she did have though were parents that loved her greatly, and she never once has complained about the way she grew up! (oh and yes, her father worked, but it was not a highly paid job, plus my nanna worked vario8us jobs to make ends meet). sure my mum never had everything she wanted, but she certainly got everything she needed and had a loving and supportive familiy as well. people are allowed as many children as they want, providing that they can love their kids, it should not matter if they can't afford every luxury there is in life.
• United States
16 Oct 07
"there are many parents out there, that may have good jobs and only one or 2 children, but don't treat them right or love them... and then there are parents that have many children that they love and care for to the best of their abilities, but don';t have much money. be honest now, which household would you prefer to grow up in?" Neither. They're two ends of spectrum and they're both bad. That's like asking if you'd rather drown or dehydrate. Neither is good. The nearer to the center of the spectrum you can get, the better.
1 person likes this
16 Oct 07
yes they are 2 ends of an extreme spectrum, i never said they wasn't, and yes idealy you would want all children world over to grow up in a balanced family that is somewhere in the middle of that spectrum, but i am afraid that it doesn't always work that way. i am the third child out of six children, i had bucket loads of love but not a huge ammount of money growing up, i had an extremely happy childhood, i had what i needed, only sometimes what i wanted and i don't regret the life i was given. my parents are now pretty well off and my sisters have both the love and the money in their lives (i am alot older than my sisters, so we grew up in completely differnt ways and times). the happy medium is achieveable, but is not often commonplace.
1 person likes this
@aaidjs (1149)
• Croatia (Hrvatska)
17 Oct 07
Thanks both off you for very good discussion!!I enjoyed!!Regards Silvana
@mitzwu (214)
• Taiwan
16 Oct 07
i have 3daughter,my 1st daughter is 9yrs old she is grade two now and my 2nd daughter is 6going to grade one next year and my 3rd daughter is around 4months old.my husband is an electrical enginer he have a good job he have a workers and he make a townhouses here in taiwan.may be some poor people have many children they dont do family planning.in my case now i dont like more child that is why i take a tubal ligation after i give birth of my 3rd baby.so we can give our daughter to have a good education if have many children even you work hard i dont think so if they can go to school because allthe things now its getting higher its very hard to earn money and to easy to spend.two or four children is enough.we need to think our children future too ok.