DO you believe in DIVORCE

United States
October 18, 2007 11:39am CST
it is hard for me to believe that a lousy piece of paper can separate a spiritual union. i think that there should be 2 types of marriages. 1 that is religious. like the one in the bible and holy ya know? and 1 that is legal. like you guys share a last name, house, money, but there is no religion involved. instead it is like a business deal. i think that'd be best because 50% of marriages are ending in divorce. if i had a gun that was half full of bullets randomly...would you let me shoot at you? it's not a good idea right? well that is how marriage is today and instead of bullets the ppl are going to hell. which is worse. and the 2nd marriage shouldn't even be called marriage. it should have a 2nd name.
8 people like this
15 responses
@lecanis (16664)
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
18 Oct 07
Umm... here's the thing. Christians do not have a monopoly on marriage. Every single society and religion has had some form of it. So saying only the religious version (YOUR religious version) should be called marriage, is like saying YOU own it, which you don't. The other issue here is... going to hell? The Bible doesn't give human beings the right to say who is going to hell. In fact, according to Jesus, anyone who accepts his sacrifice for them is saved, so what is up with saying people go to hell for any sin? The other thing is: there's absolutely nothing keeping people from making two separate commitments. I know a lot of people who had a spiritual ceremony and then later became legally married, or vice versa. There's no law against it. If you can get a clergyman to do the ceremony for you, then you're perfectly free to have your "holy marriage" without involving the legal system, and you can always have a legal marriage without involving religion by going to the courthouse. So you can already do these things... why do you need some kind of other setup for it? I got married in an interfaith ceremony by a Unitarian Universalist preacher, in a friend's home, and that was both legal and spiritual. If I get divorced, I'll both do the paperwork and break the broom my husband and I jumped over at our wedding. So there ARE two separate commitments there already, to me.
• United States
18 Oct 07
i'm well aware that we don't have a patent on marriage. what i'm saying is take the idea of marriage and make it fit the lifestyle of ppl today. although some ppl get married at the courthouse, they still recite vows from the bible. you took my comments and slapped "christian" all over it. i'm not about slapping names on religions. you believe in god then you believe in god. even if your god looks different than my god i'm sure he's the same person we just have different ideas of him. also the 2nd marriage would allow homosexuals to make their "business deal" also. not many religious marriages allow that...i can't think of any bible that okays that. so it is different. it isn't "x religion" vs. "y religion" it is "religion" vs. "lifestyle" if a person wants a religious marriage and think they're up for it then let them. if someone is living a wild and crazy lifestyle, and they know that they're not ready but want to give it a try then they should only have a legal marriage so they won't burn in hell when their divorce comes in the mail 3 years later.
1 person likes this
@lecanis (16664)
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
18 Oct 07
Espiritu!!! *hug attacks* "it doesn't say that you will go to hell if you get a divorce. As human beings we are not given the right to judge another persons spiritual condition or their relationship or lack thereof with God." I love what you said here! I know you and I don't always agree on everything, but I'm really happy you commented here. Despite what I might have made it sound like here, I don't believe in divorce as a "first resort" but I do think there are good reasons for it (abuse being the main one). And I love what you said about not judging. That's actually one thing that really confuses me about certain religious people: the constant need to judge despite the fact that their own religion says not to do so. That's what I like about you so much, that you aren't like that! =)
• United States
18 Oct 07
I believe in divorce. I see no reson why if two people got married for any reasons they may have, they shouldn't be able to legally separate. The reason it has to be legal is because it is considered to be better for the children, to support them. And why should there be two types of marriage? That would just complicate things. Plus, many people (including me) don't believe in hell, so I highly doubt that is why they're doing it. Can you please explain why you don't think the 2nd marriage should be called marriage? All the best, Commonsense0
• United States
18 Oct 07
1-if you get divorced then you obviously weren't ready for marriage, or keeping your word 2- if there is no hell then everyone can just go around killing without punishment. (now do you honestly think that that makes any kind of sense?) 3-it shouldn't be called marriage to distinguish between a religious marriage and a simple legal marriage. with the legal marriage, even homosexuals could marry since it is more of a ...business deal. honestly complicate things? 1/2 of marriages divorce and you're worried about complicating things! at the rate we're going pretty soon only 10% of marriages will last. that huge 50% says that ppl are not ready to religiously marry or they're marrying for the wrong reasons AND the don't keep their word or commitments. I THINK FOR THE PPL LIKE THAT, THERE SHOULD BE AN ALTERNATIVE TO MARRIAGE TO FIT THEIR IMMATURE, WIMSICAL LIFESTYLE.
1 person likes this
• United States
18 Oct 07
1:Yes, I meant that. They obviously weren't ready for the marriage, so they should get a divorce. That was my whole point =/ 2:And many people who are killers do get punished in the long run. Hell just doesn't seem real to me. 3:What exactly is the difference between a religious marriage and a legal one? What about people who are legally married but aren't religious? Where are you getting these statistics from? All the best, Commonsense0 PS: I may have replied fast this time, but if you reply don't expect an answer for a few hours because I am on the schools computer and the period is almost up.
• United States
19 Oct 07
"1-if you get divorced then you obviously weren't ready for marriage, or keeping your word" So people who fake and play nice and wait until after they're married to beat, rape, abuse or control their spouse makes the abused spouse weak, not ready and unable to keep his/her word? Sorry, I don't but it. There are hundreds of reasons why people get divorced. Being ill-prepared for marriage only covers a small number. "2- if there is no hell then everyone can just go around killing without punishment. (now do you honestly think that that makes any kind of sense?)" The majority of the commandments are not only common sense, but common decency. Don't lie, cheat, kill, etc. Not to mention the fact that real-world law takes care of most of it anyway. Why does everyone *have* to believe in an imaginary world of hellfire and brimstone that punishes people for anything from pedophilia to not paying for a coke exactly the same? Again, I don't buy it. Also, I thought "He" was all-forgiving? I thought repenting "wipes your sins clean" and makes it like it never happened? What about that? "3-it shouldn't be called marriage to distinguish between a religious marriage and a simple legal marriage. with the legal marriage, even homosexuals could marry since it is more of a ...business deal." Marriage is not exclusively Christian, you know. They didn't invent marital partnership, they just figured out how to regulate it. Big freaking whoop. Not everyone who gets married has a Christian ceremony in the first place, you know? Why should non-Christians be degraded and invalidated to nothing but "a buisness deal" just for having a different belief than you? "honestly complicate things? 1/2 of marriages divorce and you're worried about complicating things!" Um...yeah. Why should there be segregated terms for the exact same thing based solely on religious practices? That's not only stupid, but against the constitution. "at the rate we're going pretty soon only 10% of marriages will last." Ummm...No. It doesn't really work like that. If anything, pretty soon marriage will become obsolete thanks to narrow-minded fundamentalists like yourself who think that non-Christian relationships should be degraded and segregated. "that huge 50% says that ppl are not ready to religiously marry or they're marrying for the wrong reasons AND the don't keep their word or commitments." No, it doesn't. Quite frankly, you have no idea why those people are getting divorces and to presume they're all just stupid is ridiculous, insulting and just plain wrong. Grow up. "I THINK FOR THE PPL LIKE THAT, THERE SHOULD BE AN ALTERNATIVE TO MARRIAGE TO FIT THEIR IMMATURE, WIMSICAL LIFESTYLE." I think you need to learn to use proper capitalization, not be such a judgmental and narrow-minded b*tch, and keep your damn nose out of other people's lives. You have no right to invade or judge anyone or try to control them based on *your* personal beliefs that NO ONE is obligated to agree with.
• United States
20 Oct 07
Are you serious? Do you intend to dictate how every person on earth should or should not approach marriage, divorce, abuse, religion, etc?? It sure seems that way by your flammatory "do it my way or else" post. Good luck with that.
• United States
20 Oct 07
Peering closely at your profile and asking..."God, is that really YOU?!"
@Modestah (11192)
• United States
27 Jan 08
I believe that a divorce is a legal desolving of a contract in where the two parties will hence forth keep a separate maintenance... (room and board) but it in no way severs a valid marriage - as what God has joined together, let no man put asunder.
• India
23 Oct 07
in islaam divorce is the worst thing that is allowed?we say that when some one divorce all the angels are hurt.to give divorceis not a good thing? although we have to keep it in option,for it is important? if we seperate the religion and practical life it would be rather a business then something spiritual union.
@barehugs (8986)
• Canada
20 Oct 07
Marriage is neither Sacred or Holy, because it was man-made to keep families separate. Its been said, "Marriages are made in Heaven," but thats not so, because Marriage is based on a Promise. Promises are impossible to keep, because all things in this world are in a State of Constant Change. There is absolutely Nothing that remains constant (except change). Its a miracle that 50% of married people stay together!
• Canada
19 Oct 07
bravo
@angemac23 (2005)
• Canada
19 Oct 07
I think there should only be one type of marriage and that's the one where two people unite in love and if it doesnt work, they part ways. Its only human nature and it has nothing to do with religion. People part ways. Its perfectly normal. I beleive the bible is wrong because what it is saying is if you marry someone and it doesnt turn out right, you have to stay with them. That is not right. Everyone, religiuos or not, deserves to be happy, and If you are not happy with the person you are with, than divorce should be an option no matter what. Besides, there is enough separtation and fighting going on this world regarding religion, we dont need any more "separation" between religious or non-religious people. We are all just people, no matter what we beleive.
• Philippines
19 Oct 07
I don't find any reason why people marry and then they divorce if they found a reason that they can not be together at all because of difference, misunderstanding and etc. What I believe about marriage is that you're going to be with the one that you for the rest of you life and no matter what are the negative attitudes that your partner has, you must accept them with all your heart. That's what I believe about marriage. So, maybe we should really think twice before marrying someone so we will not divorce our partner just like that when we feel that we want to separate with him or we don't love him anymore.
@naturalst (143)
19 Oct 07
all i could say is divorce is one sad experience for every couple. it's not a pleasant experience. hope that people will stick to their partner and fulfill their vows. the rate of divorce and separation we see now in every country is really staggering. it is disheartening to know that few people stay for good anymore. this give me doubt on the kind of love we have now for others. are we still capable to love others. do we p really know how to love. are we more selfish now than we used to be. with all these things as normal part of life the world is becoming more less loving and more unpleasant to live in
@suspenseful (40316)
• Canada
19 Oct 07
That really hurts me. You see, according to you because we were married by a marriage commissioner (Canadians version of the Justice of the Peace) our marriage is not worth dibblysquat, that it is just a business deal, and that I nor my husband do not need to work at it because it really hurts me. The church I belonged to at that time, did not marry people, so we had to have a civil ceremony. I want an apology and we have been married over 34 years.
@tanjila (548)
• United States
19 Oct 07
Well, here's my thing. I don't believe in getting married unless you are absolutely 100% sure. Marriage is a commitment, something that grows with you, and shouldn't be given up on. Coming from a divorced family, I could never live with myself if I had a divorce. It's caused me a lot of pain, and I would never want someone to feel the way I have. Of course, there are always exceptions, and without a doubt, the way my parents handled their divorce was probably the poorest job, but nonetheless, it should really be a last resort.
@Netsbridge (3242)
• United States
18 Oct 07
Only when there is an endless record of abuse, neglect of family and unfaithfulness (as also recommended in the Bible). When any (or all) of these conditions has been clearly shown, then I believe it is proper for the abused or neglected to leave. The Bible recommends this, and so do I!
@uath13 (8207)
• United States
18 Oct 07
I thought marrige was a ceremony to express your commitment to each other. Thats what its based on at least. Now wether you want to tag on some religious effects is up to you but a second system isn't necessary. Dividing them into legal or religious sections isn't going to change the failure rate. It would just make things even more complicated.
18 Oct 07
So if someone is in a bad, abusive marriage, being beaten up and virtually raped, they have to stay married? I would say that the victim was already in hell, wouldn't you.