marriage

@xingxx (24)
China
November 15, 2007 8:59am CST
I began my first work four months ago.I met my girlfriend seven years ago.Sure,we are classmates in college including our postgraduate study.I have not marriage with her though we are nearly thirty,which is considered to be that marriage should be in process,or no one like to marry you.Why do I proposal to her?It is not because I do notlove her enough to live together with her,but I have no enough money to purchase house and to live a good life with her and our family.I do not want to prolong our wedding that is lika castle in the air.Now I am at a loss.That is my thought only.
1 person likes this
12 responses
@spoiled311 (5502)
• Philippines
15 Nov 07
hmmm...i am not sure what is really bugging you, but have you talked this out with your girlfriend? have you asked her what she wants to happen? well, i got married late, too, i was 31 when i settled down. so is my husband. but i had been bugging him for the longest time to get married before i actually got him to decide for us. do ask yourself what's keeping you. if your girlfriend is okay with the idea of your prolonging marriage, then good for you. if not, before you know it, you may lose her to another man,.
2 people like this
• Philippines
15 Nov 07
by the way, i noticed that this is your first post. so welcome to mylot! :-)
• New Zealand
15 Nov 07
Well I think you have to talk to your girlfriend about this. If she really loves you, she will understand for sure. For me, it is just hard if you propose and you will always be bothered because of lack of money. Getting into marriage is simple but not easy. You have to be prepared emotionally, financially, physically and spiritually or else both of you will suffer. Take it easy. Don't be bothered of your age. Talk to your girlfriend. She will be a big help. You have to plan both of your future. Goodluck. Hope both of your dreams come true..=)
1 person likes this
@shelbyo (19)
• Canada
15 Nov 07
Im not sure why you haven't proposed but my husband came to me because he didn't have money for a house and a great ring and all i told him was we are a team we should be able to work together for these things. how i see it is if your not a team now it will be harder to be a team when you do finally get married . But the biggest thing i found was my husband thought he had to take care of me which was the farthest thing from the truth talk to her
1 person likes this
@wisedragon (2330)
• Philippines
16 Nov 07
I understand how you feel. I feel that way too sometimes. In fact you're even younger than I am. It's understandable because as men it is our duty and responsibility to take care of our future family. We have to worry about buying a house and a car, sending the kids to school, etc. And if we don't do a good job, the wife will complain. But do your best and if your girlfriend loves you she'll accept whatever you have to offer.
@xingxx (24)
• China
19 Nov 07
I will do my best and answer for my responsibility.Fortunately,my GF and I would like to build our life together.I believe we will live a good marriage.
• India
16 Nov 07
I think its high time now yous hould marry.i understand that you are in a bit of trouble financially.but i think this is the right time to marry,may be she would be able to help you to solve your problems.since your realtionship has been continuing for so long i think even she would be wanting to marry you.anyway my advance marriage wishes to you,hope you have a proseperous and peaceful married life.
• China
16 Nov 07
Your experience is common in morden China. What I want to tell you is that, discuss it with your girlfriend and ask for her idea. It you two do love each other,then, your future should be created by yourselves. Take my elder brother as an example,when he got married,he also had nothing,no high salary,no suitable job and no house. But,he had my sister-in-law's support.Now, he works for the government and possesses of two houses. I slao began my first job this year, I understand you and wish you all the best!!!
@grapegyt (35)
• China
16 Nov 07
um,firstly,I think you should talk your opinion and worries with your GF.The family belongs to you both not only yourself,so maybe she wants to afford the family with you as long as you are together.Money is not the most important thing.Even you don't have to much money,so far as you love each other,you can strive and be blessedness.The house is too expensive to buy,then you can just hire one.She has been with you for seven years, so if she mind it, she has maken the decision to go away.But she didn't,it means that she want to shoulder your future with you together.Don't cover up your mind, talk with her .The lover shoulder communicate each other.~-~ Good luck! In addition,you are a couple which are admired!~-~
• China
16 Nov 07
I do not think money is a problem in marriage, because you and your girl friend both have a job. You have means to support yourself. In my opinion, your girl friend will understand your situation and you can talk about your worries and the problems. You wil get through this. Now that you have a place to live in, that is ok. You do not need to buy a new house, because it is unaffordable to buy a house in China now!
@shmokoy (124)
• Philippines
16 Nov 07
I suggest you have a talk with your girlfriend. Good Luck. Welcome to MyLot and Happy Posting.Ü
@lgwlong (199)
• China
16 Nov 07
yeah ,it is a real popular for the colleage,but you can register firstly
@Monkeyrose (2850)
• Canada
16 Nov 07
If you really do want to marry her tell her that. Just tell her you are worried about the money and the house. I'm sure together you can come up with a plan. My brother and his wife got married at age 21. They have no money either but they made it work. Its not the smartest way to go about it, but it can be done. Good luck to you both!
@linben (132)
16 Nov 07
Buddy, i think you should talk about this with your GF in case some misunderstanding takes place. If you really love her, just cherish her and catch her with a ring. As to the money and house stuff, just forget about it. It's you she wants to marry and live with. You can pursue them together after your marriage. Besides, house is too much expensive now in China. It's not easy to purchase one in a short time. Anyhow, wish you happy and good luck!