Things people say cause your husband has cancer.

United States
November 21, 2007 10:32pm CST
People say the dumbest things if they know your husband has cancer. Such as "I'm surprised you're staying with him", "Why don't you have kids yet", and "you're so strong." Any suggestions on how to reply to the foul comments or cheesy support phrases? I tire of them and the pause while you are trying to form a reply to the stupidity gives the wrong impression.
1 person likes this
2 responses
@mistissa (1348)
• Netherlands
22 Nov 07
I think it is just that people do not know what to say and want to make you feel that they are sorry for you. That is why they say silly stuff. Believe me people can be really stupid. When I had a miscarriage I was so sad, and people said maybe it was better because it was not planned. I felt like smacking them in the face, but just kept in mind that people who never been in the same position don't know what to say. And so they always say stupid things
@anniepa (26469)
• United States
22 Nov 07
First, I'm so sorry for your problems and I hope everything turns out well for him. You'll both be in my prayers. I can't believe people could say such stupid, cruel things to you! If they say they're surprised you're staying with him I'd say "Not half as surprised as I am that you just had the b*lls to say that." To the question about kids, try something equally stupid and insensitive if you can think of something that fits, like if they happen to be unemployed say "Why don't you get a job?" or "Why haven't you gone on a diet?"...something to get them back. Say it calmly and politely and hopefully they'll get the hint; if not, oh well, they're not worth it. One thing, some people may sincerely feel very awkward and not really know what to say so something might come out wrong. You can probably tell if that's the case if you know the person fairly well. I know how you feel, it's so frustrating when you think of what you should have said when it's too late. You take care, Hon, blessings and hugs for you! Annie