Child Abuse...Racism....Just a couple unrelated topics that get under my skin
December 7, 2007 5:56am CST
Just a couple of unrelated topics that both, get under my skin, and blow my mind: 1. Child abuse: I will never understand how or why some people abuse their kids. Children are a blessing and they should be loved, cherished and protected, not harmed! 2. Racism/Prejudice: To hate another person simply because they have a different skin color, practice a different religion, have different ideas or beliefs or otherwise differ from yourself is pure ignorance! Everyone is different from everyone else in some way, even identical twins are different from each other in some ways. If you are going to hate a person simply because their skin color is different than your own, or because their religion is different than your own or 'just' because of any other difference in a person, than you might as well just hate everybody and be done with it because everyone is different, rather you can see the difference or not!
7 Dec 07
It is not right to beat up or abuse a child, and those who do it are either unfit as parents or as guardians, or to be around children. They are cowards. I am a bit reticent about racism and prejudice. What is racism and prejudice hatred, and when is it being a bit uncomfortable, being a bit apprehensive or unsure of how to conduct yourself around someone of a different color or religion? Most of what we consider hatred is merely fear or other's assumption. We do not approach black people because we fear, that because of their history of former slavery, they may blow up at the slightest provocation and sue us for wrong or accuse us of things even though we are not descended from the plantation owners. I have not that problem, but I felt rather angry when we were giving an after baby shower and they wanted me to hold the baby who was black, and yet when the other babies who had been white had been at their after baby shower, no one insisted. I felt I had to pass a test. The funny thing was that the baby did not want anyone holding him except his own mother. I have a friend who is a writer who happens to be part Black and mostly Dutch, and she has two children, but until recently, because of that incident at the after baby shower, I was rather nervous about talking to her and holding the baby and playing with the little girl. (For one thing, the children have a game where they try to touch the adults, something like "You're it.) The baby looks like one of the Kalamzammar kids of that old cartoon from over fifty years ago. The little girl is half way between. As I inferred, if you want me to be especially nice to someone of a different color, you had better want me to be especially nice to someone of my own color or ethnic group. It is the same as my having to help with mentally challenged children to prove I was worthy to adopt. What I would not have happen is for me to go into a store and ask the sales person who might be Black or Muslim or East Indian and have someone embarrass me by saying something like "this lady is a true Canadian. She is all for multiculturalism" or something like that. I am nice to everybody. As for beliefs and life styles, it does not mean I approve of their actions or their choices. I hope you do not expect me to.
• United States
7 Dec 07
With the racism/prejudice thing, I was referring to people who make stereo types and openly state that a person is automatically a no good worthless person just because that person is different than they are in some way, i.e. skin color, religious beliefs, etc. and people who call other people names, harm other people or in any way belittle other people simply because that person is different from them in some way. I did not mean that a person should be exceptionally nice to another person just because they are a different race or whatever, just that they shouldn't automatically regard a person as worthless or scum because of it. I am not saying that one has to approve of the lifestyle of a person who chooses differently then they do, only that a person should realize that people have a right to live as they choose rather we agree with them or not and we should not harm, name call, judge or otherwise belittle a person simply because their beliefs or lifestyles vary from our own. I realize that some people are cautious of people of other races, religions or who have different lifestyles, etc. due to fear or lack of knowledge about the person's beliefs, etc. I am not saying that these people necessarily hate people based on this. The people I am referring to when I say they hate people for being different are the ones who come right and say things like, 'all black people are scum and deserve to die, or all Mexicans are lazy and worthless', etc. And people such as various white power groups who seek out and badly harm or kill people of other races or religious backgrounds simply because they are different. Those people make it clearly obvious that they hate people simply because they are different.
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
7 Dec 07
Yup I agree with you on both topics, and they both hit very close to home for me. 1) Child abuse: As an adult survivor of child abuse of several types, I was often told that when I had my own child I would understand the way my family acted. I don't. In fact, having my own son only made the abuse I suffered as a child boggle my mind even more. He is only 1 1/2 years old, and I look at him and see such beauty, innocence, potential. Even on the days when I am annoyed with him, I cannot imagine causing him harm. And yet I know that by his age I had been beaten, starved, locked in small spaces, and nearly killed. I cannot conceive of how any family could treat any child the way I was treated, especially now that I have my own child and feel such love and protectiveness of him. 2) Racism and prejudice. I grew up being called a "race-traitor" because many of my friends were from other races. In small-town Kentucky, white girls weren't supposed to hang out with anyone of other races, and yet I had friends from every race. It got me in a lot of trouble, but even as a child I couldn't understand hating someone just for being different. And religious discrimination has followed me all my life as well, since I am from a non-mainstream religion. I don't hate anyone else because of religion though, so I really don't understand why others would hate me over it.
• United States
7 Dec 07
I understand completely. I was abused as a child also, although fortunately not to the point of almost being starved or killed as you were, but still badly abused. My dad would hit me in head; drag me across the room by my hair; hit me with his fist, broom handles, etc. and throw things at me with the purpose of hitting me with them such as baseballs and rocks! A lot of times this wasn't even for misbehaving or being bad in any way, it was simply because I disagreed with him about something, not in a talk back or sassing kind of way either, just that I had a different opinion than his. I now have 2 children of my own and I can not conceive of ever harming them in any way. My oldest child has ADHD and there are times when he so wound up and almost out of control and he just drives me batty, but even then, he is my son and he is precious to me and I could not harm him. Also my parents are both racist and prejudice to a great degree, especially my dad. Anyone who has different religious beliefs than they do, they declare as idiots, uncivilized, unworthy and otherwise unequal. They hate black people for no reason other than they are black and insists that all black people steal, lie, cheat, etc. I grew up in a small town that was predominantly white and didn't get the opportunity to get out much to other areas so I did not have many friends of other races mainly because I didn't have the opportunity to meet them. However, one year I went on a girl scout camping trip in which there were several girl scouts from all over the state attending. While there I became friends with a black girl that I met. On the last day of camp she gave me a picture of herself and when I got home and my dad found the picture, he tore it up and told me that I had no business hanging out with "N**er scum", as he put it.
• United States
8 Dec 07
Sadly you are probably right that neither will ever be defeated. My point was that both are senseless and ignorant and it sickens me that they exist. As for both of them being normal, I do not believe that is normal for a parent, legal guardian or any other adult to abuse or harm a child! It is sick and insane!
• United States
4 Jan 08
I definitely agree with you, I cant understand why anyone would think it okay to hurt the helpless children, or elderly which is now a big thing in the news. I also cant abide prejudice, I want everyone to believe the way I do, dont get me wrong. But I dont want to be there judge if they do not because it is not my job. I will argue points of my religion as it deals with faith, and how it deals with historical fact but I hate to argue with those who dont believe and want to make you believe what they feel may or may not be true. And as a black female I have over the years had my share of people who have problems with my color, they have trouble with my Italian husband and my mixed children. But who cares. Only God can judge me.
• United States
10 Jan 08
Children are a blessing to those who want them. I'm willing to bet that there are some out there who were forced to have kids and didn't want them to begin with. That leads to abuse. Women trick men, men trick women. It's a nasty cycle. Racism happens every day to every race. It's a shame that white people can't voice the fact that racism happens to them. We'd be racists if we did.