How come we like someone even tho' we know is no good for us ?

United States
December 14, 2007 8:35am CST
How is it that we can fall or simply like someone that we already know will end up hurting us.. No matter if its subtle, if it leaves scars.. we simply know that certain things and ways of that person will end up makig us suffer and wish we were out of there.. yet, we keep on developing the feelings of likeness towards them ?
2 people like this
3 responses
@RosieS57 (892)
• United States
15 Dec 07
We keep repeating the same patterns over and over, hoping against hope for a better outcome than the last time. When that doesn't happen we get hurt and feel rejected. It's the definition of insane.
• United States
17 Dec 07
Repeating patterns! thats the main reason I think for getting back into a whole that we already know is deep and full of trouble.. do you think we do so because we simply dont know any better..or is it a form of punishing ourselves until someone new comes along ?
1 person likes this
@RosieS57 (892)
• United States
17 Dec 07
It's that we as humans are certain we can fix things. If it wasn't the way it should be, we can fix it next time and it will all be better. In love, and in health, too, it often doesn't turn out that way. We unconsciously undermine ourselves because that is what we're used to and what feels natural to us. To an objective outside obsever it seems nuts -- but for each of us it is our reality and we just KNOW it will go better this time and we just KNOW it will turn out right this time. But some things can't be fixed and other things need major changes before they will work right -- and that takes a lot of work and struggle. So it is not that we go into it looking to get hurt -- it's just that we aren't objective and we really don't have a good model to follow to make sure it does work out right. So like you say -- it's right back into digging that same hole deeper and wider. The problem is it is human nature to get stuck like that thinking we're 'fixing' the wrongs of the past and we're actually repeating the same patterns, instead.
@ozzie13 (177)
• Australia
14 Dec 07
it is called LOVE. it is fun, crazy, happy, sad, passionate, and it doesn't last forever like some think!
• United States
17 Dec 07
love .. real love, is not supposed to be hurtful or non productive.. yet again, as u describe it could be lust and something in the spur of the moment :)
1 person likes this
@musicman6 (2368)
• United States
30 Dec 07
Me, I'm sticking to the saying that says "love is blind"! I'm attracted to a person simply, first by their looks, then charisma, then personality, then compassion! And to put it bluntly, I am blind to their other "faults", and don't see them until I'm "way up the highway"! (i guess i should find out how intelligent they are) But, I don't know, I'm only a man!!