Do all guys stop being fun once you're married?

@jovimom (1576)
United States
December 17, 2007 2:51pm CST
I know my now husband was so much more fun when we were just dating. We went out dancing all the time and now he won't go. Plus he gets mad if I go w/my friends! He used to go shopping w/me and help me pick out outfits, believe it or not. Not anymore!! He acts like he's an old man and he's only 33! Just wondering if anyone else has this problem??
4 people like this
11 responses
@theprogamer (10539)
• United States
18 Dec 07
Well from the discussion it seems like a good amount of time elapsed from your dating years to today. Not too long mind you and I meant no disrespect with that comment, just an observation. It maybe possible he works hard and is getting tired from "the grind". There are times even I feel tired(a few times sore) from work and I LIKE my job. As for your situation at whole, you and your husband should go out every once in awhile just to get away, just to get out of the house. Well not "just" that, its also to keep romancing each other, to keep connecting with each other, and keeping your bonds strong. I believe relationships and marriage should be like this.
3 people like this
@jovimom (1576)
• United States
18 Dec 07
He does work a lot. Thanks for letting me know what that last comment said! We have a good bond, I just wish he wouldn't act like he's an old man is all. I keep telling him we might not be able to go out and do things one of these days, so we need to do what we can until that happens.
1 person likes this
@theprogamer (10539)
• United States
19 Dec 07
Very good point on your part Jovi. And you are welcome for the "rough" translation.
• China
18 Dec 07
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2 people like this
@jovimom (1576)
• United States
18 Dec 07
Don't know what you said, but thanks for responding...
1 person likes this
@theprogamer (10539)
• United States
18 Dec 07
"????????,????,???????,???????????????????????,???????"-[/quote] "Don't know what you said, but thanks for responding..."-[/quote] Rough Translation: There are many people who like this, not surprising, but you as a woman, should be to find ways to let your husband for your interest. You have fresh, it is necessary to constantly charge
3 people like this
@theprogamer (10539)
• United States
18 Dec 07
Sorry about that forgot to proof read it. Well I did say it was rough There are many people who are like this, not surprising, but you as a woman, should be finding ways to let your husband know your interests. You are fresh, it is necessary to constantly change.
3 people like this
@moneyandgc (3430)
• United States
18 Dec 07
No, not my husband. It is the exact opposite for me. He wants to do more stuff with me now than when we were just dating. I always tell him that he makes a much better husband than he did a boyfriend! On the other hand, we can't do some of the more fun stuff that we used to do together on the account that we have a little daughter now. Neither one of us trust leaving her with anyone but family, and since we moved there is no family around. We are going to try and go to Mardi Gras this year like old times if we are back "home" where my mom or my older kids step-mom will watch her for us.
2 people like this
• United States
18 Dec 07
Everyone should be so lucky--to have a spouse that has improved over time.
1 person likes this
@jovimom (1576)
• United States
18 Dec 07
You are so lucky! I've never been to Mardi Gras, that would be awesome! I have been talking to him lately about doing different things, and he doesn't want any part of it. I told him I would like to go see A Christmas Carol next year and one of these days I want to see an opera. What is wrong with wanting to do something you've never done before??
• United States
18 Dec 07
Yes, I am very lucky. Thankfully we have a lot of the same interests and he is willing to indulge me in mine if it is possible. We both want to go see a show on Broadway before we leave the East Coast, we also would like to see a UFC fight live one day. There are lots of new things we want to do together. He loves to introduce me to new things and I love it too. We have worked hard to be where we are today though. Things weren't always this happy at home. Now, we are working together to keep things happy. And Mardi Gras is a ton of fun if you don't mind crowds and drunk crowds at that! We used to go to New Orleans quite a bit when we lived in Mississippi before the hurricane. I miss it sometimes.
@nkhanna (925)
• India
18 Dec 07
well my hubby is just the same even after a year of marriages.however i have heard this change of attitude in many husbands.i think probably the reason is that they want to be more mature with thier age and they dont think it suits their personality to be with his wife in the same way as they were before marriage.i think one needs to understand that the childish instinct should never go from a person,since only that which is very innocent and good.your husabnd wants to keep the matured look and want to do those things only which shows his maturity.he might be thinking that being with you in such a way will look like a boyish act.tell your inner feeling ot him and convine hin that you love the man who was with you before marriage and he odes need to change atleast for you.
2 people like this
@jovimom (1576)
• United States
18 Dec 07
I've told him several times I miss going out dancing and shopping, etc. He says he had enough of the bar scene when he was in the Navy. I told him, well I still want to go out every now and then, not every weekend, just sometimes. He keeps saying he will and we never go. They closed the bar we met at and used to go to all the time. He is a very good dancer and I always enjoyed going out w/him. As far as the shopping goes, I think he just feels like I should do that with a girlfriend or something. Even though he used to pick my clothes out for me,lol!
1 person likes this
• Philippines
18 Dec 07
Well, I'm sure not all guys stop being fun, I believe I didn't myself. I heard a lot of wives complain, but, well, some of us guys also think that you gals stop being fund once you're married.
2 people like this
@jovimom (1576)
• United States
18 Dec 07
Well, I have to admit, once I hit the "comfortable" stage I kind of let myself go downhill....don't get me wrong, we still go to the movies and out to eat and stuff, but not very often w/o the kids.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
18 Dec 07
Oh boy...and I was thinking of getting married. Will my soon to be husband end that way too? Oh well, I can't remain unmarried with the guy for so long too. Fun or no fun, i guess ill just have to accept it. But what do you think we can do to bring the fun back to our lives as couples?
2 people like this
@jovimom (1576)
• United States
18 Dec 07
We've been married 4 years now, the first 2 we still went out dancing and shopping. I guess once a man gets comfortable, they stop trying so hard. I really don't know what to do besides beg,lol!
1 person likes this
@diillu (5128)
17 Dec 07
Well, I'm not married so can't tell much from my personal experiece. But yes I have seen similar problem with my sister's husband. Before marriage I must say that they were so much in love. He would come whenever my sister would call him to and they would be together almost everytime. They used do things together. But these days they are not like that.
2 people like this
@jovimom (1576)
• United States
17 Dec 07
I guess it's just different when the "new" love wears off. I think a lot of couples are more energetic about life period before they get married,lol!
1 person likes this
@Sissygrl (10915)
• Canada
17 Dec 07
Mine is just always too busy working or sleeping. We used to do a lot together too, and now do barely anything with one another. We also have a kid and one on the way.. guess i lied there are still some things we do together *Giggles* but on occasion i can convince him to come shopping or go out for dinner :) I think if they work work work, they just get into a rut, and women can as well. Life gets routine and as we get older we seem to find comfort in routine.
2 people like this
@jovimom (1576)
• United States
17 Dec 07
We have 2 kids, only 1 is his though, my son is old enough he's always playing video games :), but my daughter is 5. I just wish he'd go out dancing w/me every now and then and maybe shopping...but yes, a routine is comfortable and sometimes it's hard to get out of it
1 person likes this
@morgandrake (2140)
• United States
18 Dec 07
I am still the same stick in the mud that I was when she met me. We don't go out too much because I don't drink, and moving vehicles (cars, planes, trains) quite often set off my migraines. In fact, our first date was so bad (she didn't know my travel limits) that both of us swore that we never going to go out with one another ever again. The only reason that we got involved again was that we ended up in the same artist coop, and became friends before her motorcycle accident (another reason why we don't dance--her hip gives her pain). We both have friends that the other person can't stand. And either one of us has any problem with the other person going out alone with their friends. It is my wife who acts old--fibromylania (or however it is spelled)--my tolerance for long shopping trips is higher than hers, and I am the one who can be up until all hours of the night.
1 person likes this
18 Dec 07
heihei,wo need some money for this com.so,wo can respond in myself
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@jovimom (1576)
• United States
18 Dec 07
What does this mean??
1 person likes this
• Brazil
18 Dec 07
sorry, I dont spek english
1 person likes this