Having problems adjusting

United States
December 30, 2007 1:25pm CST
I was a stay at home dad for a touch over ten years and have recently gone back to work. As much as I enjoy the whole job thing I'm still having some problems with missing things the kids do. Last week was the first parent/teacher conference I have been unable to attend and it was really hard for me. Any other parents out there who have gone through the same thing and if so, how did you cope with it?
3 people like this
5 responses
30 Dec 07
I was a SAHM for 9 years and I am so glad I had the opportunity to do it. When I went back to work it was hard, but luckily I work in education so my boss was quite sympathetic to me going to assemblies and parents meetings. There was one time I could not attend my sons Mothers Day assembly and it broke my heart as I knew all the other kids mums would be there. I explained why I couldn't go and I wrote him a note that he took with him to school that day. During the assembly I told him to read it if he felt sad and I wrote about how much I love him. That night when I put him to bed he had stuck the note on his wall, which made me feel sad and happy at the same time. Just remember Inked, you have given your kids the best start in life they could ever wish for. Even though you may miss out on some things, you will reap the rewards from what you have done. Much respect to you.
• United States
30 Dec 07
thanks...what a great story. I spent the whole day with a huge lump in my throat, but I see how well adjusted they are, ho polite, and how well they do in school and I realize it was a very good 10 years for the whole family.
1 person likes this
30 Dec 07
I wish you many more Inked. Happy New Year!
@Sillychick (3279)
• United States
30 Dec 07
I am a stay at home mom and am struggling with the idea of going back to work. I think that the way for me would be to ease myself back into working. Maybe start part time, and gradually build up to full time. Try to find an employer who is understanding and flexible and will try to work with me when I need to take time for my son. It would be tough to just jump in with both feet because I don't want going back to work to mean I miss everything. That would be tough for both me and my son.
• United States
30 Dec 07
thanks for the response....it is difficult, but I assume that things wll get easier with time
• United States
9 Jan 08
Being a working parent is the hardest job in the world. I did it for 15 years. I am so blessed to be home with my 2 little ones now. I am sure you will get adjusted to it, but it will be hard. Sounds like you're a great dad, inked!
@elemental69 (1562)
• Ireland
31 Dec 07
Hi inked4life... I used to stay at home and look after the kids and my husband went out to work. But that all changed when he hurt his back. He is out of work now for 2 years. We were finding it hard financially so we decided that I would go back to work part-time seven months ago. But even working part-time I find that I am missing out on a lot where the kids are concerned. Especially when my youngest took his first steps. But I have to count myself lucky that they are able to do that whether I am there or not, and also that the money is coming in to make sure that they have what they need. It is hard, but when I see their faces light up at the end of the month when they get a surprise with the extra money we have or a day out, it all seems worthwhile :-)
@dmillman (2273)
• United States
30 Dec 07
I'm not a parent, but I had a thought when I read your post. If your wife is now the one that stays at home instead of you, maybe you guys could borrow (or buy cheap) a camcorder (or whatever they call them these days) so that at least the moments wouldn't be completely missed. Plus, it would be great to look back at in the future, maybe when they get engaged and show them to their future mate. Oh, sorry, I'm sure you don't want to think that far in advance!