Being liked, is it important to you?

January 14, 2008 9:30am CST
Well, It's not important to me. That doesn't mean I don't want to be as "nice" as I can, I have a very kind and caring nature but It's not something I'm going to fake or attempt to be. I accept in school that I wasn't center of attention, so really that's kinda why I prefer being in the background. I like being "liked", of course it helps with making friends but I don't see it as important. People who like me will because of who I am, not for reasons I try harder. (This is another thing I don't get) Being liked, is it important to you? ~Joey
11 people like this
27 responses
@wolfie34 (26793)
• United Kingdom
14 Jan 08
Actually it is very important to me, I guess it was the way I was treated at school, I was badly bullied and always made to look the freak, so I guess it's implanted in you as a child that if someone doesn't like you, it's your fault, it took me years and years to try to come to terms with the fact that it is NOT fault if someone doesn't like me, I still do take it personally now, although I am not as bad as I used to be. If twenty people at work for example are nice to me and one is horrid, it upsets me more about the horrid one than accepting that the other twenty like me, does that make sense? Respect...
14 Jan 08
It makes perfect sense. I'd focus more on those who do like you, why? you can't please everyone and if 20 people like you, than that one person probably hasn't given you the chance to "understand" you. Least that how I see it, personally most are just jelous of others. ~Joey Thanks,
4 people like this
@wolfie34 (26793)
• United Kingdom
14 Jan 08
Yes the green eyed monster is a vicious son of a *%*%**%*% isn't it!
4 people like this
14 Jan 08
you can say that again. ~Joey
3 people like this
• Philippines
14 Jan 08
No it's not, what's more important to me is that I be true to myself and not pretend so that people will like me...
4 people like this
14 Jan 08
Great answer glitz! People who are true to themselves are pretty much ahead of the game =) ~Joey (Friends also come natually, especially those willing to be loyal and caring) sadly not many are found, least thats what I've noticed. thanks!
3 people like this
@speedy1279 (2667)
• United States
14 Jan 08
Like you, I don't care if someone likes me or not. I am who I am. If you don't like it, then hit the road. When I was younger, I used to try to make everyone like me and most often I ended up sad and feeling lonely. It took going through a bad divorce 8 years ago for me to finally realize that the only thing that matters is if I am happy with myself. I am not going to change who I am for anyone or try to be something I am not just to please people.
3 people like this
14 Jan 08
That's great! I think we all as kids, tried it. I know I did, when I hit senior school I just stopped caring and as my previous friends went their way I went my own. they focused on being "bullys" "fools" "likable people" while I dropped into the background and I found a few decent people like me too. Schools always like it =) ~Joey Thanks!
2 people like this
• United States
14 Jan 08
Same here, I was never the popular kid in school. I didn't have a lot of friends, but I had a select few that were true friends. Yet I still tried to fit in and have more. But now I know it shouldn't have mattered how many friends I had, but how special the few friends I did have were.
3 people like this
14 Jan 08
=) I always wondered why people "bothered" with those who wanted to be popular, each to our own I guess. ~Joey Thanks speedy =)
2 people like this
• United States
14 Jan 08
I do not try and make myself likeable because it is not important. People who do like me are in my circle of friends those who dont are not therefore it is not important to me what they think. I would rather be respected and this something that I would have to earn.
3 people like this
14 Jan 08
Exactly! I think the world would be much better if more people stopped pretending, maybe then polite people who shine and others would want to be more like that. *dreams, ~joey
2 people like this
@Sissygrl (10915)
• Canada
14 Jan 08
Ok i think this is a VERY fine line.. I dont particularly care if someone LIKES me or not.. but i dont want anyone to HATE me. Does that make any sense? I dont care that people dont think i'm popular or anything like that, but i dont want people to hate me or talk badly about me. hehe I try to be nice to most people, but if i dont like them, then i just usually avoid them for the most part. Stay away from me and i'll stay away from you. I dont like to cause trouble or have drama in my life!
3 people like this
14 Jan 08
It makes perfect sense! Your popular to me, so are half of those who have replied. I really think it's down to accepting ourself because our friends will no matter what and those who don't arent friends. ~Joey
3 people like this
@cher913 (25890)
• Canada
14 Jan 08
i am a very individual person and very comfortable in my own skin. of course everyone wants to be 'liked' but i am pretty wacky and definitely march to the beat of my own drummer...not everyone can deal with that... i guess what i am saying, yes, i liked to be liked (and with people), but i also love alone time
3 people like this
14 Jan 08
I actually don't care, take it or leave it. I'm not going to cry because someone or many don't like me, I enjoy being liked personally but I don't want to be in that position. Thanks for the reponse vicki, you've shared something special. ~Joey P.s I'm more of an alone person too.
2 people like this
• Philippines
14 Jan 08
okay!  - sign of approval
it is important to be liked by people but to pretend to be someone else just to be liked or get the approval of other people is wrong. you are right, we don't have to fake our nature because people should like us for who we are and not what we pretend to be.
3 people like this
14 Jan 08
I think most "decent" people will tend to accept anyone for who they are, while "fakers" will only like those who go around being a carbon copy of everyone else and fake smiles etc. It's quite sad to see someone who's simply nice rejected because everyone is fake. ~Joey Thanks
2 people like this
@cosylvia (401)
• China
15 Jan 08
hello,i like being liked being loved by someone,i dont like the feeling that no one care about me,,i wish my friend around me ,,wish you have a good day
• Philippines
15 Jan 08
Not really important for me, because in my personal opinion people should like you with what and who you are and not trying things on how they will like you... i dont like to pretend to other people just for them to like me....
1 person likes this
• Singapore
15 Jan 08
Oh I don't really care about being well-liked. Why should I? Just bow down to me and let me crush "you" under my feet and I will be satisfied.
1 person likes this
@izathewzia (5142)
• Philippines
15 Jan 08
It is not really that important if I am being liked or not. What important most to me is being loved and respected. Like is too shallow feeling. I want to be considered and placed deeper in their hearts.
@stephcjh (32327)
• United States
21 Jan 08
It is very important to me in my heart, but I don't put myself out there any more and do things to make people like me anymore. It just does not work and I get used every time. I never was liked or had many friends in school or was very popular but just to be noticed or recognised would have been nice but oh well now. I am a loner and always will be. I am who I am. I spend all of my energy with my husband and my daughter in real life other than online and that is good enough for me.
• Halifax, Nova Scotia
15 Jan 08
i would be more likely to go out of my way to make someone hate me than like me.. ive always considered myself an over popular loner haha i have plenty of friends but i prefer to be alone *shrug* but as for being liked.. nah i dont think its important at all.. i think liking yourself is important (not to the point of obsession) but yah to be happy with who you are is all i go for.. i live life by my rules do my things and sleep sound nightly.. no time for games with social gain in mind
@lilaclady (28240)
• Australia
15 Jan 08
I think most people want to be liked,appreciated, accepted but I must say if people don't like me then I think that is their problem, but it is nice to be liked....
@meemingNEW (2228)
• Philippines
15 Jan 08
It bothers me hearing people who doesn't like me.. But I honestly haven't heard anyone complaining something about me so I guess they like me. Not that I'm that likable.. This is just me and I am what I am.. So, yeah.. It is somewhat important to me.. It doesn't feel good at all when someone doesn't like you or you suspect they don't. take care
@AmbiePam (50071)
• United States
15 Jan 08
I want to be liked by the people I personally like myself. Like my family, church members, possible coworkers... But it isn't my goal when I meet someone. I'm not interested in forcing myself to be something I'm not just to be liked. The most attractive thing about a person is how comfortable they are with themselves. Besides, I like you. : )
@drannhh (15240)
• United States
15 Jan 08
I've always preferred to have integrity and know I did the right thing rather than to be liked when forced to make that choice. Although I don't go around deliberately seeking to be disliked, if the price of popularity is too high, I will gladly pass it up. On the other hand, like you, I do try to be as nice as possible under most circumstances, bearing in mind the saying "Nice guys finish last" which surely applies to gals as well as guys. Probably if we are reasonably nice sufficient people will like us for what we are.
@barnkinney (1343)
• Philippines
15 Jan 08
it would only matter if i like the person too. it would not be nice to be disliked by someone you like. but the thing is, i don't like all the people who likes me. i know i can't please everyone and what others think about me is none of my business, but i can't help but wonder sometime if they do like me or not. i hate two-faced people, and i'm as honest as i can be. sometimes i just make up excuses to avoid being two-faced.
@zenmachado (1619)
• United States
15 Jan 08
It is not important for me to be liked in general. I take pleasure in being liked, but only for who I am, and not what I can falsely project. If someone dislikes the real me... then I care not for their opinion. Also, I care about those who I favor such as friends and family.. but stranger, coworker, disliked family.. for them I care not..
@arkaf61 (10882)
• Canada
15 Jan 08
Well, in certain aspects more than what it should. Due to my own childhood, and insecurities that came from that,no matter how good it was, I always had a huge need to be liked/loved somehow important by and to my family. I do not turn into someone I am not, but I am much more tolerant and compromising than I would ordinarily be. Outsiders are different, even friends. Sure everyone enjoys being liked but it's not a special need for me to the point of changing myself to be liked. I think I am a decent enough person, and I'm worth by what I am, and, apart from the setback with relation to family, I feel it's enough:) Is it important? Yes, but not enough to turn me into someone I"m not.