What was the point in your life that your faith was shaken?

Philippines
February 2, 2008 7:46am CST
Last year wasn't a very good year for me. My mom and I got into a fight and our relationship was slowly deteriorating. I was always thinking that just because I am a teenager now means that she should lessen her attention. Sometimes I felt I didn't belong, and that she didn't care. Other times I felt she was being too plastic to me. There was even a point in time that I tried to commit suicide because I can't balance the chaos in me with the work at school and my relationship with my family at home. I didn't even want to go home after classes, thinking that they probably wouldn't even care if I am gone. But God awakened me to the fact that I can't live a life like this. I need a family and a mother who would take care of me. I also realized that my idea of escaping by means of suicide meant that I didn't really loved the life that He gave me. After this incident, I woke up from my ridiculous nightmare and found myself apologizing to the people I loved. This was the point in my life where I doubted if there was really a God. And I found that the answer is yes - as long as there's life, God is there.
3 people like this
8 responses
• United States
7 Feb 08
I was raised Catholic but I didn't really develop faith until I found the Baha'i faith last year. Most of my life was full of depression and anxiety. I went to church every week but I didn't believe, the things they taught didn't make sense to me so I just assumed that none of it was true and that God didn't exist. Fortunately, I am now able to see that I was looking at the Bible in the wrong way. I was interpreting it too literally and not studying the deeper message. Now I am able to develop a stronger relationship with God everyday. Although, events still shake my faith and I still have doubts at times, these times never last and I am much happier. I am able to feel true happiness and appriciate the beauty of life. Thank you God!
• Philippines
7 Feb 08
That was nice of you to share your experience! So you were raised Catholic but didn't believe what the doctrine was teaching us? I have also experienced that same way as yours. I didn't know that there was a more in-depth analysis of the teachings - I thought they were just some boring scriptures. But now as I have grown (or so I think) I now understand the meaning of the things being taught for me.
1 person likes this
• United States
7 Feb 08
Yes, the doctrine just did not make sense to me. They would read what I saw at the time as boring scripture and then say "this is what it means..." and I would think "I have no idea where they got that but ok?" I eventually realized the catholic church was not working for me so I sought out another church. I went to a lot of different churches then started looking online and found the Baha'i Faith, which is amazing, all of the teachings make sense and explain why there are so many different teachings of the same scripture. I am glad you been able to understand the scripture more in your own way as well.
• Philippines
8 Feb 08
I hope you're enjoying your chosen religion now. Even though I don't get the chance to attend masses every Sunday as what the church requires and I haven't been as religious as other followers are, but I can say that I still hold on to God with my hope and belief that He is still always there for me.
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Feb 08
I am glad you are better. I never have lost faith in G-d. But then again I don't view G-d as sweetness and light. I see Him as an artist and being a artist He has a temper and can be emotional.Along with that, I believe in good and bad carma. So whenever something bad happens to me, I don't blame G-d.But when something does go right I do thank Him.But being a pessimist it is always a surprise when things go right.
• Philippines
5 Feb 08
I could stand in your perspective too, I admit that I am pessimistic when it comes to viewing things so it really does surprise me when good things come my way. Anyway, I am just curious why did you omit the letter O in His name? IS there any reason behind it?
1 person likes this
• United States
5 Feb 08
I am Jewish and it is a rule that we don't spell out the word G-d.That way you can erase the word or in this case backspace the word .I guess the action of erasing the word would be like erasing G-d. You can't be Jewish without G-d.
• Philippines
6 Feb 08
Oh I see, I respect your religion's belief but I really can't seem to understand why they have to not mention His name? After all, He is our Creator right? And He should be praised for all the things He has done for the world. But I do mean to respect your sector, it's just that I am bewildered by such beliefs. I hope you could explain so I might as well understand the Jewish religion (I have encountered friends online even on DeviantArt.com who are Jewish and they don't spell out His name but I have no guts to ask them because they might think I am being offensive).
1 person likes this
@martgin (55)
• Philippines
3 Feb 08
Ms. Amplified, I'am so convicted in your situation, having a similarity in your life. But God Always guide me to proof to ourselves and our family your hurting or ache the way that showing you. Sometime our imagination no controlled but if you always inside of our LORD (Papa JESUS) you guidance always there no mmatter what happened or struggle.All maother or parents having a strategy how love is in her children but we are here to proof our parents that we can do everything to become a successful kids or daughter. If your mother not okey (fine with you, you show them or her you are good or awesome daughter to her. In my real life i proof to each members of my family or other people that i pursue my dreams with God sights. I ignore the struggle as i read the bible every morning or everyday that i have time to guide always. I'm not give up someday my family proud to be who I am now, as OIC of a small busines i share my blessings to my family right now although a small profit or gain. I feel great right now to move on to proof my parents i do the best that i can do. So my friend keep the good heart no matter what happen. If you have time come visit philippines to proof my real life. Always remember GOD ALWAYS AWESOME..... OPen up your feelings to them.
• Philippines
3 Feb 08
Thank you for painstakingly putting effort in your long comment. Yes I have learned my lesson very well and will not succumb to defeat in terms of self-battle ever again. Prayer is indeed the most powerful tool and God really listens if we want to, He's just waiting for our initiative to talk to Him. Thanks again!
1 person likes this
• Kuwait
3 Feb 08
martgin you always have the strong faith and i salute you,, i need you to share some to me,,
• Philippines
5 Feb 08
annettenasser I agree with you! Faith is something that we should treasure because it could give us the tiny spark of hope that could be the flame to our lives to get us going.
17 Feb 08
First let me say that if your religion gives you comfort then fine. Peace of mind attributes to good health. However I personally do not believe in any deity.I was brought up as a protestant. My father dying at my age of three. My mother with hate in her heart for him took it out of me by constant severe beatings. At the age of 14 I ran away and joined the Norwegian Merchant Marine. A very troubled and mixed up kid.Where was this God to help me?. I firmly believed everbody hated me. So I hated everybody in return. Then at the age of 16 I was lying on the boat deck one night whilst sailing through the Med. looking up at the shooting stars and feeling the power of the sea beneath me. Something snapped within my brain. The awe I suddenly felt was terrifying.No one individual in the shape of a human being could possibly be responsible for all this (God) It was then I vowed to treat all life with a respect I had just discovered how to understand.From that moment nature and only nature started to rule my life.I became obsessed with the question- Why am I here? I am now 76 years old. I still have not found the answer. However during the process of looking I have come very near. I have studied ALL religions that it was possible to study.This mainly I suppose to reassure myself that my decision of non belief was constantly the right one. Of the 3500 religions and sects on this planet of ours there is NONE that gives the answer. The major ones tend to be so dogmatic and fundermentalist in there claims that they are the only true believers they are prepared (in fact still do) to kill to prove their point. Let them get on with it. That train of thought abhores me. I now follow the path of Wicca. This way I find to be mentally soothing to my attitude on life. I have discovered ways of becoming so attuned that every waking moment is now an adventure.I took up Dowsing to add to my mental and physical pleasures. The wonderful constant discoveries in this field fill me with amazement. I am now happy and content. Whereas once I was full of bitterness and hatered. If your mind is free of problems your body tends to react in the same way. So as I said in the beginning if you believe in your God and it gives you comfort it can't be bad can it. It depends on how passionate you believe. Are you prepared to kill to prove your point?. Stop trying so hard to find an easy answer. Relax. Make the aura around you burn with respect for yourself and start looking at the way you are living with a different approach. It costs you nothing. What have you got to lose. Best regards and Blessed Be. ORDO1234
• Philippines
19 Feb 08
Thank you for your such detailed response! It is obvious that you have put your time and effort to this discussion. Your response is much appreciated. Thanks for taking part in my discussion. I agree that none of all the religions prove their own point. Sometimes I think religion is taking us all apart when it should be keeping us intact. We know everyone has different perspective right? And we still keep on having religions or sectors to bind us as one. But it doesn't matter that much. I am a Catholic myself and I value that, but it is also said in the Bible that God looks past on what is seen so as long as one worships and praises Him and appreciates His creations, He will be glad. For me, God is not an entity who lives in Heaven but the part in our hearts that make us still go on with life.
@cripfemme (7715)
• United States
3 Feb 08
As a person with a disability my faith was often tested by faith healers. They are insane people who belittle our lives and experiences of oppression. Now I avoid them.
• Philippines
5 Feb 08
Faith healers could be in positive or negative form, as long as they don't heal you in exchange for money they could be really what they claim to be. However, these people are just mediums of God and they do not take the form of God's power. Thank you for your response and it is a good choice that you avoid them, better go to a doctor instead.
• Kuwait
3 Feb 08
I dont know now i feel that this is just a beggining of what i have to be strong,,, i feel that i am lost and need help to gain my faith again, im not a bad person, i always love my family and respect everyone but sometimes badluck doesnt leave me alone,i dont know what else i have to do,, i need more prayers as much i need some goodluck for my family,myself and my love, and to my work too..
• Philippines
5 Feb 08
Well like what others have posted here, don't lose faith because it is something in which you could cling to in times of trial and distress. It is this thing that gives you the tiny spark of hope to get you moving and motivated. I wish for your happiness and for your good luck with regards to your life and your family as well as your career. God Bless and thanks for participating in my discussion!
@spoiled311 (5502)
• Philippines
3 Feb 08
hi amp! although my reason is not as grave, there were points in my life when i felt that my faith was shaken because marriage was not being given to me. i wanted to get married. i have a good, godly man for a boyfriend, but for a long time, we have not married. anyway, it is a long story because it was a long journey, but in the end, we finally got married. now, we are waiting again for i to become pregnant...sigh...everything needs waiting. anyway, but i am not anxious...i am waiting with a hopeful heart for I know the plans of the Lord, and it is for my good, not to harm me, but to prosper me. take care and God bless you dear! :-) have a blessed sunday! :-)
• Philippines
3 Feb 08
Thank you for your response, yes it is really hard to wait especially if you're expecting that to happen or come into your life. But like what you've said, God has reasons and those will be revealed unto you in due time! Have a blessed Sunday too!
@ctrymuziklvr (11059)
• United States
2 Feb 08
I lost all faith in God 19 years ago when he took my Dad from me. My Mom did talk me into changing my mind and I went to church with her regularly. Now that God has taken my Mom too I've lost faith again and I don't think anyone can change my mind this time.