Would you stay close to your inlaws?

@raydene (9875)
United States
February 3, 2008 9:01am CST
My mother-in-law is going to 90 this May and although the husband is OUT I still love his mother dearly. His sisters and I are extremely close..One is closer to me then would ever be to him..actually many times I have been the bridge that connected him to his family members. It reminds me of the joke that I will include below.. What about you and your past,present inlaws? xoxoxoxo The joke goes: A man answers the phone and has the following conversation: "Yes, mother, I've had a hard day. Gladys has been most difficult - I know I ought to be more firm, but it is hard. Well, you know how she is." "Yes, I remember you warned me. I remember you told me that she was a vile creature who would make my life miserable and you begged me not to marry her." "You were perfectly right." "You want to speak with her? All right." He looks up from the telephone and calls to his wife in the next room: "Gladys, your mother wants to talk to you!"
3 people like this
9 responses
• United States
3 Feb 08
I think if I had a good relationship with them, then I would want to stay close to them. And it depends a little on how the relastionship with my ex ended. But if it wasn't on bad terms then I wouldn't mind staying friends with him either. It all just depends on lots of stuff! =)
@raydene (9875)
• United States
10 Feb 08
Well so far so good...I just take it day by day.. I am sad that my ex is still feeling the need to be dishonest but that's not about me.. We will never be friends ....I don't think I could be friends with someone I don't trust..but I can be friendly and tolerant. oxxoxoxoxoxo
@marciascott (25557)
• United States
3 Feb 08
I Raydene, I get alone pretty well with My Mother-inlaw too, It has been times when I got My husband back with all his family, I did read the joke, LOL.
2 people like this
@raydene (9875)
• United States
10 Feb 08
I just am glad to get along with everyone...I hate to rock the boat..She has been my mom longer then my own mom was.. xoxoxoxoxo
@Darkwing (21590)
10 Feb 08
Yes, Raydene, if they wish you to keep in contact, then I would remain friends with my in-laws. When I split from my first husband, I carried on visiting his Mother because of the children. We had grown together as a family unit and I spent some of my time, staying at her house whilst my ex was abroad on army postings. Therefore, the kids were very attached to her and she to them, as was I. There is no reason why you shouldn't continue to see them. They are as much a part of yours and your children's lives as they ever were. Brightest Blessings, my dear friend. xxx
@raydene (9875)
• United States
12 Feb 08
We have shared so much through the years and I know her heart,wants and needs better then her children except one daughter. She is such a hoot in alot of ways..Last time she came by(summer) she chose to climb over the fence..said it's way too much trouble to open and close the gate to the horse paddock..Now she will be 90 in May...he he xoxoxoxoxoxo
1 person likes this
@Darkwing (21590)
12 Feb 08
She may be 90 but she is young at heart, my friend, and I would imagine, great company to have. Brightest Blessings. xxx
@MsTickle (24966)
• Australia
9 Feb 08
I would if they wanted me too. It didn't happen unfortunately. I truly loved my father-in-law, he was a lovely man. My mother-in-law was a real nasty piece of work and mentally challenged in my book. She ignored her grandchildren, more to get to me than a dislike of them thank God, so they weren't aware. She was terribly conniving and I blame her for the behaviour of her violent son. My children grew up with the slow realization that their Dad wasn't interested in them and his parents and siblings couldn't care any less about them as well. My mother-in-law went along with my father's coercion of me to marry because she was desperate for a grandchild then she subtely undermined my husband and my relationship by dropping hints that the child was not his. This after discovering her elder daughter was pregnant. She set me up to look bad to my husband time after time by offering me help then changing her mind at the last minute. My own family had abandoned me. I try to be nice to everyone but this woman scared me. I knew at first hand what she was capable of. I couldn't get far enough away fast enough.
1 person likes this
@raydene (9875)
• United States
10 Feb 08
Sweets, You just love yourself and you'll find the doors open and the more confidence you have the more others will be attracted to you..And know that it isn't about you weather she like or disliked you..It was always about her and who she is... xooxxoxoxoxoxo
• India
4 Feb 08
Wow, l loved the joke. Here’s one from me…It is said that God couldn’t be everywhere everytime so he created the Mother. Seeing God, Satan too thought that he couldn’t be everytime everywhere so he created the Mother-in-law! Jokes apart…I am very close to my in-laws though I cant say I am close to my mother-in-law. I have stayed with them for 10 long years and most of the time I have felt as if I am a guest in someone else’s kitchen. I mention the kitchen because no matter how much we have progressed, a woman still likes to think of herself as the queen of her own kitchen. While I was staying with my in-laws, everything pertaining to the house was decided by my mom-in-law and with me working, I did not want to interfere all the time and blow up minor misunderstandings into long-time hostilities. But I did not like it always either. Anyway past is past and inspite of everything, I will never forgot that it was she who looked after my son while I worked outside. I am eternally grateful to her for her help and I maintain a civil relation with her. I urge my husband to look after all her needs, I enquire after her and give her due respect, but I no longer try to be extra close to her. Regarding the others in the family…there is my father-in-law who loves me like a daughter (since he doesn’t have one himself) and my one and only brother-in-law, who is more like a brother than a brother-in-law.
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@raydene (9875)
• United States
10 Feb 08
Too bad you can not find common ground with his mother... I just LOVE my mother in law and dread the day she goes because I know she will not live forever..but I sure wish she would.. oxoxoxxoxoxoxo
@winterose (39931)
• Canada
4 Feb 08
I guess it depends upon the in-laws I would not be close to interferring inlaws, but other than that I am the type of person who tries to get along.
1 person likes this
@raydene (9875)
• United States
10 Feb 08
Hi Doll, You have a point but to be honest I can not imagine not getting along..I just always do..I don't know why but I do...I really love everybody most of the time and if I don't like someone I stay away from them. oxoxxooxoxoxo
• Philippines
4 Feb 08
that's a good thing to be close to your inlaws. good for you. from the start of our relationship i could feel that my mother-in-law doesn't approve of me. she doesn't like me a bit. i always tell my wife that it would be really great if i can be close to her mom. but like what my wife always tell me, she's the one who's gonna spend the rest of her life with me, not them. so why worry about pleasing them. i don't know. i just don't feel that it's a nice things. i feel that the best way to get through everything is acceptance of the family members. my mother on the other hand loves my wife. i think she loves my wife more than me (not jealous) and i sure enjoy seeing them so close. for me, it's like a fulfillment.
1 person likes this
@raydene (9875)
• United States
10 Feb 08
Honey it's your mother in law's loss cause I can tell you are a special guy and like your wife says it how she feels about you that is important.. Big hugs Doll and share one with your wife. xoxoxoxoxoxo
@mummymo (23709)
3 Feb 08
Definitely and I know you will Mom! I stayed on good terms with my ex in laws after I left my ex and I was very sad to lose his mum last year! I love the joke but I would hate to think of being spoken of this way by my family ! xxxx
1 person likes this
@raydene (9875)
• United States
10 Feb 08
Hey Doll and you would never deserve to be spoken about that way either. That is the thing..the kids are always there too.... Hugs Sweets oxoxxoxoxoxo
@BarBaraPrz (17286)
• St. Catharines, Ontario
3 Feb 08
I did not stay in touch with my in-laws because I never felt entirely comfortable with them when I was in the marriage. Also, we lived 3000 miles apart.
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@raydene (9875)
• United States
10 Feb 08
Sweets I have lived very close and when the kids were small 'Grammy' spent an aweful lot of time with them so we didn't have to leave them with strangers...My kids never had babysitters..just family. xoxoxoxoxoxo