Christian rejection

United States
February 10, 2008 5:35pm CST
Have you ever felt abandoned by other christians? Or have you ever abandoned a fellow christian because they began to slip away from church or "sin"? I have felt like I could not trust my fellow christians because when my husband began to slip away I practically begged for someone to be a friend to hima nd maybe help keep him connected. All that happened is that people would ask me about where he was and tell me to tell him they missed him! I finally got angry and told them I was caring no more messages if they missed him they could call or come see him themselves! I know that sounds harsh but we have been a faithful part of this body for almost ten years. We have raised our children here. It is the only church we have ever attended as a married couple. (exept for special events or times we were out of town) I have been very angry and dissappointed and I am beginning to think that this is the very reason the lost eludes us. When we partied in our early years if we were missing from events people would be at the door! Worried and caring. Dont get me wrong my committment is to God and that is why I have struggled through and stayed with it but isnt there a better way?
2 people like this
5 responses
• Canada
7 Mar 08
I have always felt abandoned by other Christians because I do not fit with any of the denominations currently out in the world. I think of myself as an observing Roman Catholic (which there in itself I am alienated by many denominations) but the Roman Catholics don't like having me around because I am a free thinker and frown upon me for interpreting the scripture and studying other sides of the story like the Gnostic Gospels and the Qa'aran. I have checked out the Anglican Church and they seem to feel the same way about me. I have also attended quite a few services in Lutheran Churches and surprisingly they had the same thing against me as the Catholics as well(I find this most entertaining of course because of how the Lutheran Church was founded!!). I have gone to the Baptists, Greek Orthodox and many other denominations but still can't seem to find one that I fit into, that I don't feel alienated in and it has not come yet. But perhaps someday...
1 person likes this
• United States
7 Mar 08
I know what you mean I have heard other denominations slam each other over fine points of scripture. That makes me feel really bad because there is only one God and one Jesus yet everyone thinks they have the inside line on the truth. Its almost like they have to point out that someone is wrong to feel right? Did that make sense? I just really want the truth and nothing but you know?
@gerald_lian (2193)
• Australia
10 Feb 08
I'm facing all these at this very moment. I don't understand why, but people, including fellow Christians alike, are always putting me on the sidelines no matter what I do. I would be the one always to be left out whenever there are any social gatherings as they would "forget" to invite me. Even in church, any conversation I start would end in less than 1 minute because people prefer to talk to their other friends. I also have the passion of serving in church in the worship ministry, but the church just doesn't want to put me in even though they ran a survey in church about the members' serving interests. They could do an audition if they want to (I'm fine with that), but they just are not doing it! I find myself going back early after church service each week because there is not many people I can talk or relate to. I'm also clueless on finding a way out of this, because the problem seems to come not from me but from the others.
• Australia
11 Feb 08
I'm a Christian, and I could talk to you if you like. But as you mentioned that you would like someone trustable to talk to, and I'm someone that you barely know, maybe it's not too safe to talk to me either. Regardless, I still wish you all thes best and hope you find someone that you can really confide with. =)
• United States
11 Feb 08
Hey at least your honest! Which is something else that is hard to find! Ill give you a shot though. LOL Adding you if you like.
• Australia
11 Feb 08
Ok, try me! =P
@dangs123 (10)
• United States
11 Feb 08
Yea I feel like I'm been abandoned by other christians because no one trys to help one another and that isn't good
• United States
11 Feb 08
You are so right and like I told my daughter its not that we want them to help because it is their "duty" but because they have taken the time and effort to get to know us and love us. Like the bible says you can have all the spiritual gifts in the world if you have not love you have nothing.
• United States
6 Mar 08
Bless you! You are right of course hugs are not the same but here is a great big HUG right back to you! Your story is identical to mine!
@asgtswife04 (2482)
• United States
11 Feb 08
You know, sometimes it is hard to find true, caring, Christian people that will reach out to help someone come back to the Lord. I am so sorry that you are having to deal with this, especially when you need the church so desperately at this moment and time. Have you ever thought about maybe trying to find a new place to attend? Maybe you should pray about it and see if maybe God is leading you somewhere else and telling you it's time to move on to another place He has for you. My husband is searching, but is not saved yet....not that I know of anyways. He's overseas, so it's hard to tell what all is really going on, but i'm proclaiming in the name of Jesus that he is finding God and that God is doing a wonderful move in him. Maybe you should start praying that way and praying that God will restore him and bring him back to Him. Sometimes, prayer is all it takes...even though it could take a while. I'm not sure how you mean he's backslidding or getting away from God, but I do understand how frustrating it can become. I'll be praying for you and your husband. I got this wonderful book called "I promise". It's a Christian book and it pretty much tells you that you need to focus on you...don't stop praying for him, but focus on you and how you act or react to situations. If your husband sees the Lord in you and working through you and you don't overreact to things, then he will change...most of the time for the better. It's how we act towards things that makes them grow closer to God and make them want that life. Search in yourself for the happiness, don't depend on him for it. And again, pray..pray..pray. Prayer is so powerful and being a follower of Christ, "Ask and you shall receive." Good luck and keep us posted. Again, I will be praying for you andyour husband as well. God bless
• United States
11 Feb 08
I have thought about that true... especially when our Pastor of ten years left for another area. I think I felt I would be desserting the church at a critical time. Plus I am a bit disallusioned and wonder if it is really any different anywhere? I mean I do not want anyone to fake it and just call or come by out of "duty" I guess I wanted a true christian family that would love us and really be there, you know? I know you are right of course about praying it is God and God alone that will do the work in my family. Thank You for your prayers and I will be praying for you and yours as well.
• United States
11 Feb 08
Thank you very much. Just keep the faith that God will do a work in your husband. Things will work out in God's time. and your prayers for me and my family are greatly appreciated. God bless
• United States
14 Feb 08
Shewolf,,, Scripture tells us to trust in no man, for man will hurt you.....(break your heart and/or mislead you). Trust in God alone. I don't think people abandon us intentionally. They are on their own path just like we are....learning as we go. Some of us are just on a different rung of the ladder. Don't expect anyone in or outside any church to help you. Learn to depend on God alone. Again, those people are as hurt and disappointed as you...in their own ways for their own reasons, and most don't have time or 'love' in their hearts to honestly be that concerned. They are too busy with their own salvation and lives to be concerned over one other human being. While there are some that might care and have compassion, scripture tells us not to expect anything from them. "We must all seek out our own salvation with fear and trembling". Are you going to that church for the people, for the pastor or to learn about God? If you're going for any other expectations than to learn about God, you are probably going for the wrong reasons. I don't mean anything offensive by that...I have experienced the same things you have. My husband and I were members of a congregation for over 20 years and finally realized over half of the people who went there didn't even know we were members, let alone, existed as a part of the body of Christ. It's not really there fault. It's what they are taught and how they perceive their own faith. My best advice would be take it upon yourself to 'work out your own salvation' and just be the best example of Jesus Christ you can be. It just might be the only Jesus anyone ever sees. The only better way is to realize why they call it a personal relationship. It's between you and God....not you and the congregation. While it might be in your heart to believe that you are to 'stay within the fellowship'.....the fellowship is when two or more are gathered in His Name.....like now....... You can have an effectual 'church' in your very own home with you and your husband and family. It doesn't take a 'village' to worship God. Be blessed honey...Keep the faith.
• United States
6 Mar 08
I think you are right in part, but didnt Jesus tell us to be one? How can we be one or part of the body if we dont care about each other? I also think about when Jesus mother and brother were there to see him and he asks "Who is my mother, or brother?" I always looked at that as if we are to act like family with each other. But you are right about why we should go to church and it absolutely must be about God FIRST! Thank you.