child's father in jail for raping minor

United States
February 24, 2008 9:45pm CST
A friend of mine who is happily married just found out that the biological father of her 9 year old son is in jail for raping an underage girl. The biological father does not pay child support or visit her son and has not had contact for several years. She worries that one day he will attempt to recontact her and her son. What would you do?
3 people like this
9 responses
@youdontsay (3503)
• United States
28 Feb 08
Once the boy is 18 he can have access to info about his biological father - if he wants it. Does he know that a biological father exists? If the man is in prison, at least in the US, she can notify the prison if the man tries to contact the son against her wishes. It may never be an issue, however. So I'd recommend not stressing over it until it happens. And when it does be very honest and frank with the boy about why he hasn't been in his life.
• United States
2 Mar 08
He met my son; see my earlier replies to other posts. Saw him 3 times and haven't heard from him since. Thanks for your input. I appreciate it.
@twoey68 (13651)
• United States
25 Feb 08
I would move to where the father wouldn't have any way of knowing where the boy was and when the boy was old enough to understand I'd explain the reason he doesn't have contact with his dad. But then I think absent parents should have to earn the right to be in their child's life and not just take it for granted that they are entitled to it.
1 person likes this
• Canada
25 Feb 08
I agree with what your saying any male can be a father but only a man can be a dad
1 person likes this
@johndur (3049)
• Pasig, Philippines
28 Feb 08
whats the problem with that?even if he is irresponsible father he still is the father of that boy...right?i dont think there is direct connection on the rapist father with his son...even if he contacted his son,it would be fine as long as he will not get him and make more disturbances in the peaceful living of his son...
• United States
28 Feb 08
I don't think a man who rapes children i.e. a pedophile is a good role model. I find it disturbing and disgusting.
1 person likes this
@gabs8513 (48715)
• United Kingdom
28 Feb 08
I am sorry johndur I tend to disagree fully there I would not let anyone like that near my Child Father or not
@johndur (3049)
• Pasig, Philippines
29 Feb 08
he may not be the best role model but he is stil the father of that kid.and are you thinking that he might influence the kid making him think that it was alright.he may have some good reasons why he have done that.
@gabs8513 (48715)
• United Kingdom
28 Feb 08
I would tell him where to go to be honest as I would not want anything to do with him after this
@gabs8513 (48715)
• United Kingdom
28 Feb 08
I would say yes he is
@ledouxs (64)
• Canada
25 Feb 08
I personally would make my self so hard to find it's not even funny. And only tell those who are important where I am. But seeing as he's locked up the worst he could do is call from prison right and you have to accept the charges first so for now she's safe from being contacted. But if I were her I would keep my son as far away as possible from his father
• United States
25 Feb 08
The child is male. He raped a female child, however, don't want him near my son!
• Canada
25 Feb 08
just because a man rapes a girl doesn't mean it's not capable of doing it to a male and not only that the son may grow up thinking rpe is ok if the father has contact regardless of what he was told.
1 person likes this
@dtroas (481)
• United States
1 Mar 08
If there has not been no contact in several years that is a good thing. It is better for a child not to have someone in their life like that. But I would do what ever I had to do as to when he would get out that there is no contact with her or her son. Which people who go to jail for rape should not get the chance to get out. I wish your friend all the luck
@dfinster (3535)
• United States
28 Feb 08
Oh my gosh, that's horrible. I feel so bad for that lady and her son. I would definately not let her son have anything to do with him. Even though it was a girl and not a boy that the monster did that to, he's still a sick and demented individual. If he could do that to a little girl who knows what his sick mind can think of.
@winterose (39918)
• Canada
25 Feb 08
i wouldn\t worry about it, he is in jail when he gets out she can think about it then
@jhl930 (3605)
• United States
25 Feb 08
I would do whatever i had to to protect myself and the child because if he is desperate enough he would try anything to get them back...and I dont think that the mom has to worry about the father getting custody because i don't really know any judge that would give the child back to the father..with the father going to jail for raping a underage girl...